Blogs


Notices

Class of July 2018 Part 1

Old 07-06-2018, 03:49 PM
  # 121 (permalink)  
Administrator
Thread Starter
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 187,828
Blog Entries: 1
What if my problem is just someone trying to control everything around him???
The good thing is you have 32 posts of yours to go back and read and help you remember why exactly you came here in the first place LivinginLV.

I was a guy trying to control everything and everyone and every interaction round him - but I was/am also an alcoholic.

Its very normal to be resentful of drinkers for a while - it's great mind fodder for our inner addict/AV/Beast to work with.

Things will get better. The more I built a sober life I loved, the less what other people did (or drank) worried me.

In the meantime tho - do you have to sit in the same room as your husband when he's drinking?

'grats on 53 days too - awesome

D
Dee74 is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Free2bme888 (07-11-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), LivinInLV (07-07-2018), mnjen (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-06-2018)
Old 07-06-2018, 03:53 PM
  # 122 (permalink)  
Administrator
Thread Starter
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 187,828
Blog Entries: 1
Welcome Dejvice and atlast!

Congrats on your milestones Minion WGlenn mistory citrus, Sober369 and anyone else hitting a milestone today

ps noone is posting too much - this is a support thread

D
Dee74 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Free2bme888 (07-11-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), mnjen (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-06-2018)
Old 07-06-2018, 04:03 PM
  # 123 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sober369's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Georgia, USA
Posts: 1,777
LivinginLV, I don't live in your life, so I can't say for sure whether you have a problem with alcohol or not. But, I will say that if it is your AV talking, it sounds just like mine. As soon as I start feeling better, I start seeing other people drinking and my AV says, See? Everyone drinks, it's an enjoyable part of life! What is wrong with you that you deny yourself so much? … And lots of other things, too, of course. It's helped me to go back and read posts, read others' posts and write out all the reasons alcohol makes my life miserable and read that a lot. I hope it helps you, too.
Also, I have a replacement drink. Now it's cherry cranberry juice, but I've had others. I find myself craving it. I sit down and drink way too much of it, and often have some snacks to go with. This is not the time for me to be dieting, though that time will come soon.
Sober369 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Sober369 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), LivinInLV (07-07-2018), mnjen (07-08-2018)
Old 07-06-2018, 07:46 PM
  # 124 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 108
Today concludes day four of sobriety for me. Not sure why but I am seriously exhausted today! Perhaps this is part of the withdrawal process, I am not sure. Alcohol acted like an upper for me, strangely. Drinking used to wake me up.

Anyway, so happy to be sober again today. I am very grateful for the support here. Hope everyone has a wonderful, sober weekend.
PaigeMasters is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to PaigeMasters For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), mnjen (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-06-2018)
Old 07-06-2018, 08:25 PM
  # 125 (permalink)  
Administrator
Thread Starter
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 187,828
Blog Entries: 1
its very common Paige - you'll get your energy back eventually

D
Dee74 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Free2bme888 (07-11-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), mnjen (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-06-2018)
Old 07-06-2018, 08:50 PM
  # 126 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sober369's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Georgia, USA
Posts: 1,777
Another sober day! I think I'll sleep really good tonight. I hope all of you do, too!
Sober369 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Sober369 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Free2bme888 (07-11-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-06-2018, 09:05 PM
  # 127 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 108
Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
its very common Paige - you'll get your energy back eventually

D
Thanks, Dee! I know I will. I must say sober sleep is wayyyyy more refreshing!
PaigeMasters is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to PaigeMasters For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-06-2018), Free2bme888 (07-11-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 12:34 AM
  # 128 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 22
Morning All - just checking in, hope everyone is doing well and enjoying a sober weekend.

I'm on a road trip south tomorrow, holidays have always been a massive trigger for me - camping and drinking in the sun. It won't be happening this time, I have a plan for each day and when the AV starts, it's going to be a simple NO.

Almost heading into my third week without drinking and life is certainly a million times better without alcohol destroying it. Sleeping great, anxiety has dropped considerably and life is so much more manageable.

I cannot be complacent though, I have to keep working at this.

Have a great weekend wherever you are
Futurehope79 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Futurehope79 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), mirrorball (07-07-2018), Sober369 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 01:24 AM
  # 129 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 52
Morning everyone,

I woke up today feeling so good about my decision to quit, went for a run in the sunshine and came home feeling amazing, that has to rival any drug high!

It's great to have a fresh head, be able to engage fully and do things with my family. Really beginning to feel like this might be it, my time to break free, after so many broken promises.

The AV has quietened down a little, it knows its cornered. It's been trying to bargain a little 'well what about when it's just when you go to see your friend down south' 'how about you only do it special occasions etc' but I know from bitter experience that that just leads to more using so the answer is NO.

I just want this nagging voice in my head that has haunted me to go away forever. I can see now what a hold it had on me, and the only way to break free is to do it totally, no exceptions.

Enjoy your road trip Futurehope, did you decide what to tell your friend?

Hope everyone is doing well, for those finding it tough keep going and it will soon get better!
mirrorball is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to mirrorball For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Futurehope79 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), LivinInLV (07-07-2018), Sober369 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 01:54 AM
  # 130 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 22
Glad you are well Mirrorball - love waking up at the weekend free of the anxiety filled hangover.

I've been back to the pool swimming after a few months break. Exercise does wonders for the mind and body

Yes, I'm going to tell her that I've stopped drinking - you were right that honestly is the best policy. I know there will be questions as to why so I'm just going to tell the truth - save having any awkward moments.
Futurehope79 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Futurehope79 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), Sober369 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 02:33 AM
  # 131 (permalink)  
Member
 
kopfan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 471
Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
The more I built a sober life I loved, the less what other people did (or drank) worried me.
D
This is what I've belatedly come to understand. It's no use looking at other people and what they do. You have to focus on what you do and make a better version of yourself every day. Secretly the "others" who drink too much wish they could be sober as well, although they will never admit it. I've kept a diary for the last year, and every day I write something like this:

six days sober
seven days sugar-free
four days caffeine free

Walked dogs 45 minutes
Meditated 30 minutes

Today I am grateful for...
Today I am thankful for...

My workout routine and the weights lifted.

Tasks to do today (I always fill the first one the day before)

Day seven beginners yoga routine
walked dogs 45 minutes
meditated 30 minutes

11,700 steps today.
Weight: 221 pounds

What I noticed is that every time I drank, the diary pages would be blank for the next two, three or even four days. Sometimes there are gaps of ten days. And of course, needless to say, my weight always went up. Looking at my diary, it is there in black and white how depressive, morose and ineffective those drinking binges made me, and that's what made me come back to SR.

I remember the black hole that seemed to open up all those years ago when I first gave up drinking and sometimes sitting around, wondering what to do with all this free time on my hands. I used to be angry at my wife for taking off and going drinking with her daughter (like she did last night) but now I fill the time with meditation, yoga and reading. Initially, I couldn't stand to be in the same room as myself all on my own with nothing to do, but now I welcome the solitude and peacefulness.

You have to learn to love yourself, and for someone that has been drinking all their life, running away from who they truly are, that can be an emotionally painful experience to handle and why it is so easy to go back to drinking again. I did think about joining her last night, but I came back to SR because I need help and support to stop doing that. I'm so thankful you are here.

Kopfan

Last edited by kopfan; 07-07-2018 at 02:35 AM. Reason: typo
kopfan is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to kopfan For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Caramel (07-07-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), mnjen (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-07-2018), stargazer016 (07-11-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 05:00 AM
  # 132 (permalink)  
nmd
Member
 
nmd's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Western New York
Posts: 2,022
Blog Entries: 8
Enjoy your road trip futurehope, begin honest with your friend and having a plan for temptations is defimately the way to go

Not much going on for me this weekend besides house cleaning and yard work. Ill take it, its been too busy of a summer so far
nmd is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to nmd For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), Sober369 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 06:35 AM
  # 133 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sober369's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Georgia, USA
Posts: 1,777
Happy Saturday everyone! Feels good to wake up with no hangover this morning. Day four without a drink and I feel better.
My plan so far is to do a morning meditation every day, go to AA meetings, but I haven't decided how many and when, I'll work on that today. I've moved since I was last on this site, and it's scary to go to a new meeting, but I have to make myself do it. I know AA isn't for everyone, but I don't have any kind of support other than AA as far as friends or family who understand, so it's important for me. I'm also still close enough to my old town that I'll likely see some of the others that I already know from AA, so I still have that 'here's me, trying again after yet another failure' feeling. It isn't a great feeling, but I'm not that concerned. It is what it is, I'm not going to go die in a corner because I've failed before.
I also plan to spend some time on this site every day. I need to fill out the plan, and will work on it today. Yesterday I didn't get very far with it, but I did the number one thing, stayed sober.
All of your posts sound so positive and inspiring. It's a great help. I also have this site on my phone, and plan to read a bit at work every day when I catch a few minutes.
I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend.
Sober369 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Sober369 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), LivinInLV (07-07-2018), nmd (07-08-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 09:06 AM
  # 134 (permalink)  
Member
 
LivinInLV's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 46
Good Morning.....

Feeling a lot better today. The house is quiet which is nice. I have a lot to do today which will keep my mind busy & not to hear that AV asking for me to come and play.

Thank you everyone who commented on my post yesterday. It helped me feel a lot better.

Thank God for another sober weekend.
LivinInLV is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to LivinInLV For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), nmd (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 11:10 AM
  # 135 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 108
Everyone is saying exactly what I feel! I woke up this morning on my 5th day of sobriety and realized I didnít feel that dreadful anxiety, depression, guilt, sickness, dread, etc... I actually woke up and felt a HUGE sense of relief and peace.

Itís so nice to know there are other people who can understand. I hope everyone has a great Saturday.
PaigeMasters is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to PaigeMasters For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), mnjen (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 12:46 PM
  # 136 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 1,285
Originally Posted by PaigeMasters View Post
Everyone is saying exactly what I feel! I woke up this morning on my 5th day of sobriety and realized I didnít feel that dreadful anxiety, depression, guilt, sickness, dread, etc... I actually woke up and felt a HUGE sense of relief and peace.

Itís so nice to know there are other people who can understand. I hope everyone has a great Saturday.
It sure is great to wake up without worry and remorse!
Atlast9999 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Atlast9999 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), nmd (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 03:41 PM
  # 137 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sober369's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Georgia, USA
Posts: 1,777
I just started thinking about drinking. I was in the kitchen, hungry, and dinner is still a while off. I suddenly wanted a beer. But not one, of course. I got a snack. Special juice, crackers, cheese and pickles. The only thing special about the juice is that I call it special. Not going to drink any alcohol.
I felt so much better today. I hope everyone had a good day.
Adding to my plan: Eat regularly, get lots of rest, drink lots of water and juice. And take vitamins.
Sober369 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Sober369 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Caramel (07-07-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), nmd (07-07-2018)
Old 07-07-2018, 04:27 PM
  # 138 (permalink)  
nmd
Member
 
nmd's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Western New York
Posts: 2,022
Blog Entries: 8
Good for you Karen on grabbing a snack instead of drinking. HALT is huge for me early on.

I took an unplanned nap this afternoon. Just exhausted after tidying up and a long week. I ended up googling "can you drink with fatty liver" to remind myself, no i cant. Thoughts of having a bottle off wine were strong but passed.

Been drinking seltzer, watermelon and mandarin orange aren't bad. Diet ginger ale is my favorite.
nmd is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to nmd For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-07-2018), Hopeful528 (07-07-2018), Sober369 (07-08-2018)
Old 07-08-2018, 12:27 AM
  # 139 (permalink)  
Member
 
kopfan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 471
Good Morning Everyone!

A slow cooker is a great asset because dinner is ready before the late afternoon/early evening beer thoughts start creeping in.

Have a great day everyone!

Kopfan
kopfan is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to kopfan For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-08-2018), mnjen (07-08-2018), nmd (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-08-2018)
Old 07-08-2018, 04:28 AM
  # 140 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Pittsburgh Pennsylvania
Posts: 25
Good Morning,
Wow, slept so soundly! Just one of the many rewards of being alcohol free.
cando24 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to cando24 For This Useful Post:
BreakFree (07-15-2018), Dee74 (07-08-2018), nmd (07-08-2018), Sober369 (07-08-2018)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:36 PM.