Im a mother with small children a wife and im an alcoholic
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Originally Posted by Jjb2018 
Maybe try calling at a different time then? Different people man the phones. People do it voluntary, so maybe something was happening in their life / home that night. Nothing to do with not being welcome at AA generally. Not at ALL. It's best to call when you're sober. You won't get much out of the phone call loaded, because you won't remember properly what was said..
I check it from there new website mostly run by the church its alright ill try anyway if makes u sober why not try.. and thank you so much this is actually the first time im being accepted and someone understand what ive been through.for sure ill stay here
I check it from there new website mostly run by the church its alright ill try anyway if makes u sober why not try.. and thank you so much this is actually the first time im being accepted and someone understand what ive been through.for sure ill stay here
Just to clarify though - AA is not run by the church. Its run by alcoholics who got sober and want to stay that way. When AA talks of God, they don't (necessarily) mean a Christian / Religious God, but a Higher Power of each person's own understanding. For some folk that might be as simple as G.O.D. = Group Of Drunks, or Good Orderly Direction, or Great Out Doors. For others it's their conscience / integrity. As a Christian myself I often find myself a bit of a rarity in the groups I go to most.
The reason that meetings are often held in churches is that the rent tends to be lowest there, and the places are reliably clean and secure.
BB
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Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 110
I am also a mom of 3 small children and also on my day 2 after a few relapses. Your story sounds very similar to mine. I was only sober through all 3 pregnancies and breastfeeding. I’ve taken my toddler to the store to buy alcohol early in the morning as soon as I dropped my other 2 off at school. Today I’m home with the 3 kids because of summer break. They wanted to go get ice cream and I had to say no because I didn’t trust myself not to get beer. I’m hoping it will get easier. I need to do this for my health and my kids. My oldest is 7 and at the age where she noticed that I was drinking. The sad part that makes me feel terrible is she doesn’t even question it. She’s growing up thinking it’s normal to have a beer or mixed drink in the morning. It all has to stop, I have so much guilt that takes keeps me up every night... after the 3 hours of sleep I get from passing out drunk I wake up and think about what a terrible mother I am. I love my kids more than anything and want to live to see them grow up, that is what I’m thinking when I’m tempted. I’m so glad I opened this thread and saw other parents that are alcoholics like me.. I feel like the only one sometimes
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Join Date: Mar 2018
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SickInlove
Hi im glad u reply my post im so happy u are in day 2 as well.yes its a horrible feeling after the drinking i have a 5yr old and a 7months old i really want to become a good and better me for my family so tired of living the guilt i know motherhood is though but this moment i want to cherrish making memories with them which i could remember.
Lets do it together day 3 for me today
Im really glad i found u here we are not alone now. U take care and pls msg me when u can on this thread i would like to know ur day and il share mine to u we can do it. Isolation of parenting is my major trigger and its not easy.
Hi im glad u reply my post im so happy u are in day 2 as well.yes its a horrible feeling after the drinking i have a 5yr old and a 7months old i really want to become a good and better me for my family so tired of living the guilt i know motherhood is though but this moment i want to cherrish making memories with them which i could remember.
Lets do it together day 3 for me today
Im really glad i found u here we are not alone now. U take care and pls msg me when u can on this thread i would like to know ur day and il share mine to u we can do it. Isolation of parenting is my major trigger and its not easy.
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Join Date: Sep 2017
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Originally Posted by Jjb2018
SickInlove
Hi im glad u reply my post im so happy u are in day 2 as well.yes its a horrible feeling after the drinking i have a 5yr old and a 7months old i really want to become a good and better me for my family so tired of living the guilt i know motherhood is though but this moment i want to cherrish making memories with them which i could remember.
Lets do it together day 3 for me today
Im really glad i found u here we are not alone now. U take care and pls msg me when u can on this thread i would like to know ur day and il share mine to u we can do it. Isolation of parenting is my major trigger and its not easy.
Hi im glad u reply my post im so happy u are in day 2 as well.yes its a horrible feeling after the drinking i have a 5yr old and a 7months old i really want to become a good and better me for my family so tired of living the guilt i know motherhood is though but this moment i want to cherrish making memories with them which i could remember.
Lets do it together day 3 for me today
Im really glad i found u here we are not alone now. U take care and pls msg me when u can on this thread i would like to know ur day and il share mine to u we can do it. Isolation of parenting is my major trigger and its not easy.
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Isolation when you are a stay-at-home mom is tough. Are there things in your community that you and your children could get involved in? Public Libraries are often a great source of activities for young children.
Good job on Day 2!
Good job on Day 2!
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Join Date: Mar 2018
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[QUOTE=Anna;6938009]Isolation when you are a stay-at-home mom is tough. Are there things in your community that you and your children could get involved in? Public Libraries are often a great source of activities for young children.
Hi anna
Yes there is but when im done that it gives me craving that i want to have a share to like reward for my self for doing i guess a good job...so AV ooohhh u need a drink.
So far im doing alright work home and here
Hi anna
Yes there is but when im done that it gives me craving that i want to have a share to like reward for my self for doing i guess a good job...so AV ooohhh u need a drink.
So far im doing alright work home and here
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Join Date: Jan 2015
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wow so real.....I hope you find relief. Your kids deserve it. Just enjoy life for what it is ….dinner ...a nice tv show....dessert you get it. I need to follow my own advice lol. I know it's hard...really hard. Hoping you can get control.
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Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 129
Hi Jjb and a warm welcome to you! I’m a wife and a mother also, and a recovering alcoholic since January of this year. Your story isn’t the same as mine, but just as for all of us here, the parallels and similarities far outweigh the (superficial) differences. You sound exhausted and pretty beaten down, but you need to know this: sobriety is yours for the taking. You can absolutely stop drinking, just as so many have done before you; all you need to do day on day is decide not to drink and stay convicted in that decision. Read and post here frequently, check out a local AA meeting and listen to that voice inside you that’s telling you enough is enough, because it’s telling you the truth. Best to you!
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Originally Posted by SickInLove
Yes! Let’s do this together, I will keep checking in with you. You can also private message me if you need to talk. I know how hard it can be to quit especially when you feel isolated. I recently quit my job to become a stay at home mom. I was doing well with recovery.. well better than where I was a year ago. A year ago I was drinking a bottle of vodka a day. I got a few weeks sober here and there. Then decided I would just drink beer and wine (my alcoholic brain convinced myself that was better) I went from a 6 pack at night once my husband got home ... to hiding beers and cans around my house. Now that my kids are out of school and I don’t have to drive I’m worried if I don’t quit it will turn into binge drinking again. This forum helped me a lot last year when I was trying to quit, welcome to day 3 for both of us!
Hows ur day 3 going?? I went to work today seems im happy today that i unload my secret to someone and knowing that im not alone anymore.
Yes same like you the last 2013 to middle of 2016 was the worst of my alcoholism i thought im gonna die. binder mostly like straight7 to 8 days then ill stop how awefull the hallucination is can already hear voices. but then , during that time i never learn its only awefull when withdrawals comes promise no more drinking, after 5days enough i could have strength another 15 to 20 beers a day to the extent i bring alcohol in my coffee mug to work just to sustain the day.my son will be in the daycare after the day my husband will pick us up then continue drinking when we arrive home. my husband never drink i dont know how we survive those years.
Then i started to tapper down theres no such thing as slow or moderation for me.took me middle of 2016 till now struggling to stay sober. Im glad i already pass the process of pink cloud i find it horrible too. Two persons talking each other inside my head and my emotions like i cant even recognize me anymore.
Please lets not gonna drink tomorrow will make to 4days for us for our kids and husbands. We dont need to experience this again.
Hope you and the kids did have a great fun day.
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Originally Posted by wynwrights
Hi Jjb and a warm welcome to you! I’m a wife and a mother also, and a recovering alcoholic since January of this year. Your story isn’t the same as mine, but just as for all of us here, the parallels and similarities far outweigh the (superficial) differences. You sound exhausted and pretty beaten down, but you need to know this: sobriety is yours for the taking. You can absolutely stop drinking, just as so many have done before you; all you need to do day on day is decide not to drink and stay convicted in that decision. Read and post here frequently, check out a local AA meeting and listen to that voice inside you that’s telling you enough is enough, because it’s telling you the truth. Best to you!
Congrats that u stay sober this far..and for sure u will see me here more often thank u
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Originally Posted by PalmerSage
Jjb, what you described sounds so exhausting to me (and very familiar, of course!) Are you planning to make today your day 1, or have you already stopped drinking for a bit? We are most definitely here to help. 
Glad to tell you im 3days sober today..been sober here and there longest was during pregnancy last year. Yes that kind of life is so exhausting and i pay cash in daily basis during those times along with my shame and dignity just to have that kind of a lifestyle . Isnt that crazy???
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Hey there, Jjb. Congratulations on day 4; you sound very positive and committed to sobriety and that's the attitude you need to succeed. I don't have children but remember well my dad's brutal alcoholism and how he was not fully there for me as a parent. I know you want your kids to have a wonderful life and to be there completely for them.
I drank only beer but alcohol is alcohol no matter the form, about 18 a day. (I am a small woman.) When I quit full stop I suffered those awful hallucinations and had a couple of seizures as well. It was hellish but I got lots of help (I needed it!) and celebrated my 30th month of sobriety last Saturday. I can't moderate either--I have no 'off' switch when it comes to drink. I was about as far down as it gets--now things are not perfect but they are much better, and that's enough. Wishing you all the best on this amazing, sober journey.
I drank only beer but alcohol is alcohol no matter the form, about 18 a day. (I am a small woman.) When I quit full stop I suffered those awful hallucinations and had a couple of seizures as well. It was hellish but I got lots of help (I needed it!) and celebrated my 30th month of sobriety last Saturday. I can't moderate either--I have no 'off' switch when it comes to drink. I was about as far down as it gets--now things are not perfect but they are much better, and that's enough. Wishing you all the best on this amazing, sober journey.
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Hi Jjb- Ten years ago that post could have been written by me. Mother, wife, and closet alcoholic. Hiding can and bottles. A nervous wreck wondering if I will run out and not be able to think up and excuse to get to the liquor store. I've done it. I understand. I seriously have no idea why on Aug 1 2008 I decided no more but boy am I glad I did. I can't believe I almost have 10 years sober. It's so much better. Keep holding on. It is so hard at times but worth it. Good luck.
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Originally Posted by Verdantia
Hey there, Jjb. Congratulations on day 4; you sound very positive and committed to sobriety and that's the attitude you need to succeed. I don't have children but remember well my dad's brutal alcoholism and how he was not fully there for me as a parent. I know you want your kids to have a wonderful life and to be there completely for them.
I drank only beer but alcohol is alcohol no matter the form, about 18 a day. (I am a small woman.) When I quit full stop I suffered those awful hallucinations and had a couple of seizures as well. It was hellish but I got lots of help (I needed it!) and celebrated my 30th month of sobriety last Saturday. I can't moderate either--I have no 'off' switch when it comes to drink. I was about as far down as it gets--now things are not perfect but they are much better, and that's enough. Wishing you all the best on this amazing, sober journey.
I drank only beer but alcohol is alcohol no matter the form, about 18 a day. (I am a small woman.) When I quit full stop I suffered those awful hallucinations and had a couple of seizures as well. It was hellish but I got lots of help (I needed it!) and celebrated my 30th month of sobriety last Saturday. I can't moderate either--I have no 'off' switch when it comes to drink. I was about as far down as it gets--now things are not perfect but they are much better, and that's enough. Wishing you all the best on this amazing, sober journey.
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Originally Posted by Leana
Hi Jjb- Ten years ago that post could have been written by me. Mother, wife, and closet alcoholic. Hiding can and bottles. A nervous wreck wondering if I will run out and not be able to think up and excuse to get to the liquor store. I've done it. I understand. I seriously have no idea why on Aug 1 2008 I decided no more but boy am I glad I did. I can't believe I almost have 10 years sober. It's so much better. Keep holding on. It is so hard at times but worth it. Good luck.
Thank you for the support
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Join Date: Mar 2018
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I don’t know if it will help. I usually drink 2-3 nights a week and that’s a couple of beers followed by a bottle of wine and feel so sick the next day. If I wasn’t working full time it would probably be more nights. Anyway I read Alan Carr, “how to stop drinking” and now reading “ this naked mind” by Annie grace and to be honest the though of alcohol sort of repulses me. It’s been 7 days now since my last drink. I also signed up for dry July so I have a another good reason to keep going! I wish you all the best
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