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Old 06-14-2018, 02:54 PM   #1 (permalink)
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i cant win this


sorry i have been around for so long , i have been going to AA but am finding things hard my mental health isnt so great hearing voices and seeing things ...am sober but i dont want to be still self harming still hurting myself most of the time and mind ******* myself

friends are trying to help me but am on trail to hurt myself more and more i cant escape it i though i could improve but all there is is darkness or pain not one can understand unless there in my head and no one can do that

pain hell darkness i cant win this
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Old 06-14-2018, 02:57 PM   #2 (permalink)
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GMS, I'm glad to see you.

I'm sorry you're struggling again and that there is so much pain in your life. Please reach out to your counsellors and doctor regarding hearing things and seeing things. There may be medical help that will improve things for you.

Please see what a wonderful and beautiful person you are, rather than thinking of cutting and hurting yourself. You deserve peace in your life.
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Old 06-14-2018, 03:01 PM   #3 (permalink)
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(((((GMS)))

It is so good to see you.

I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling.

Your doctor or therapist needs to know that you are hearing things, dear one. Maybe call or schedule a visit.

SR really cares about you. I hope that we hear from you more often.
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Old 06-14-2018, 03:08 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I'm glad you are here GMS... there are a lot of people who care for you here and in other areas of your life. Anna and Soberleigh have some great advice to keep seeking help from your doctors/therapist and I hope you do.
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Old 06-14-2018, 03:21 PM   #5 (permalink)
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they know i hear voices they give me meds that do **** all they say am treatable as its stress they dont give a ****

buying tools tomorrow then am done
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Old 06-14-2018, 03:25 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GrantMeSerenity View Post
they know i hear voices they give me meds that do **** all they say am treatable as its stress they dont give a ****

buying tools tomorrow then am done
What do you mean buying tools and then being done, GMS. I hope that I am wrong in my interpretation.

We love you, GMS.
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Old 06-14-2018, 03:27 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Have you seen. Psychiatrist? Those problems sound serious. How long have you been sober?
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Old 06-14-2018, 03:32 PM   #8 (permalink)
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i feel like am an non person a human has the right to believe in what ever they wish to believe in but am not allowed to believe anything apart from Christianity my pastor and my husband make sure i dont believe anything else am a non human i dont have rights as i am mentally ill
the tools are blades you can guess the rest
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Old 06-14-2018, 03:43 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I was afraid of that, GMS.

Please talk to your husband right away or call an emergency number.

You are a very valuable person. You are a very kind, beautiful and tender soul. The world needs MORE GrantMeSerenities - not less.

You are very important.
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Old 06-14-2018, 04:19 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I am very glad to see you. We really do like you here.
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Old 06-14-2018, 04:55 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Everyone wants to see you well GMS.

Please talk to whoever you need to about your plan to buy blades.

Chooselife -Choose Life - Suicide prevention in Scotland
Suicide - Health topics - NHS Health Scotland

At one time I thought life would always be hard, always be a struggle. But I was wrong.

Don;t make a life time decision on the way you feel today. Maybe you need more meds or different ones. Maybe you need to see your DR and therpaist more than you so?

Like others have said we need more GMSes in the world

Please get some help and stay safe.

D
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Old 06-14-2018, 05:38 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I like you!

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Old 06-14-2018, 07:25 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Life has a way of turning around when you least expect it to, GMS.

Hang on and never give up.
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Old 06-14-2018, 08:01 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Tonight I sat next to a man in AA who was about my age (67). He was talking about being angry for not remembering and missing so much in the 80's & 90's. He talked about how precious life was and he would give anything if he could take those two decades back. He mentioned he was waiting on an organ transplant and wasn't sure when/if it would happen. I asked him after the meeting what sort of organ he was waiting on. He said he needs a liver transplant. When I hear people talking about wanting to hurt themselves or take their own lives it makes me really sad. Life can be so much more if we look past what we think is a major crisis and see people who would trade places with you in a heartbeat. GMS I hope you find a way to enjoy peace and health as life is really good if we let it be.
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Old 06-14-2018, 09:20 PM   #15 (permalink)
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GMS, I went thru hearing voices like someone standing next to me talking. I also went thru seeing things and people that weren't there. I thought I was losing my mind and it scared me so bad. I suffered alone because I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone. The voices and people who weren't real went away. I'm not sure if it was alcohol induced or why it was happening but it was awful. Please know you are not alone in what you are going thru and that you have people that care for you and are willing to help you. You are human and beautiful and you have people that love you.
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Old 06-14-2018, 10:27 PM   #16 (permalink)
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GMS...don't give up. There is so much hope for you. You KNOW you are hearing voices. That is huge. That means you are self aware and can beat this. You just need the right help. You express frustration of not being free. I understand that. We are all trapped in our own situations. We all are on a spectrum between insanity and sanity. Do not end your beautiful life. You have yet to discover your purpose and true beauty. Keep working with your doctors. Believe in your right to live and be free. Don't rob yourself with those blades.
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Old 06-14-2018, 10:32 PM   #17 (permalink)
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GMS, to reiterate what SoberLeigh said: the world needs more sensitive people like yourself. Please keep posting.
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Old 06-15-2018, 04:23 AM   #18 (permalink)
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just want you all to know am safe ...sorry i wasnt feeling very well last night
am ok now
thank you all for replying and talking to me
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Old 06-15-2018, 05:12 AM   #19 (permalink)
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I'm so so glad to see you GMS. No need to apologise, we're here when things are good, but most importantly we're here when things are bad. No judgement, just support and strength. You sound like a wonderful man, and you are very much loved.
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Old 06-15-2018, 06:10 AM   #20 (permalink)
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I’m very glad, GMS!
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