Iím an Alcoholic - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Go Back   SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information >
Register Blogs FAQ Members List Calendar Arcade Mark Forums Read





Reply
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 06-12-2018, 06:16 PM   #1 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 752

Iím an Alcoholic


But goddamit I am going to fight this. For me, my children (including my stepdaughter), my wife, everything.
Horn95 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to Horn95 For This Useful Post:
Anna (06-12-2018), BDTL (06-12-2018), calmself (06-12-2018), Dee74 (06-12-2018), Delilah1 (06-12-2018), entropy1964 (06-13-2018), Hevyn (06-12-2018), Ladysadie (06-12-2018), Lizajane (06-12-2018), Outonthetiles (06-13-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 
lessgravity's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,247
Quote:
Originally Posted by Horn95 View Post
But goddamit I am going to fight this. For me, my children (including my stepdaughter), my wife, everything.
What's up Horn?
lessgravity is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to lessgravity For This Useful Post:
August252015 (06-13-2018), Delilah1 (06-12-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:26 PM   #3 (permalink)
Member
 
FreeOwl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 7,418
Quote:
Originally Posted by Horn95 View Post
But goddamit I am going to fight this. For me, my children (including my stepdaughter), my wife, everything.
For me, for my children (including my stepson), my life, everything....

It all became much easier when I stopped fighting and instead started embracing.

Embracing sobriety instead of fighting alcohol.

Embracing tools and support instead of fighting to manage on my own.

Embracing a connection to a higher power (not "God" in my case) with a willingness to ask for help and a willingness to see that something greater than myself might help instead of fighting the "God" thing.

Embracing the image of a life without alcohol as a goal instead of fighting images of the 'loss' of my life with alcohol.

You can.....

__________________
~ Life!! It's WAY too good to drink to! ~
FreeOwl is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to FreeOwl For This Useful Post:
columbus (06-12-2018), Delilah1 (06-12-2018), least (06-12-2018), Mango212 (06-12-2018), NoBones (06-14-2018), Snowydelrico (06-13-2018), thomas11 (06-13-2018), tomsteve (06-13-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:28 PM   #4 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 752
Just tired of the squirrel cage. Tired of not being who I was, and what I can be. Same for all of us.

Was in LA meeting with people I had worked with before. And they talked about our great experiences. All I could do was barely control my anxiety. I want to be that guy again. With Swag (thatís how I won my wife), ability, vision.

I hate who I am right now.
Horn95 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Horn95 For This Useful Post:
Lizajane (06-12-2018), Mango212 (06-12-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:32 PM   #5 (permalink)
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 51,895
That's what alcohol does to us, Horn. It robs us of our self-esteem and makes us hate who we are. You can be the person you were and that you want to be again.
__________________
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

Marianne Williamson
Anna is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Anna For This Useful Post:
BDTL (06-12-2018), Delilah1 (06-12-2018), Forward12 (06-13-2018), least (06-12-2018), Lizajane (06-12-2018), Mango212 (06-12-2018), thomas11 (06-13-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:34 PM   #6 (permalink)
Hillbilly Girl
 
MariahGayle's Avatar
 

Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,910
And we can absolutely be the person we’re meant to be Horn! Put it first, before all else. You can do this! I see it here on SR everyday, people who have been where you are & found a program that works for them.
__________________
I lay aside the battles within my own mind, and grant myself peace.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
MariahGayle is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to MariahGayle For This Useful Post:
Lizajane (06-12-2018), Mango212 (06-12-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:37 PM   #7 (permalink)
Learning to live again
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: New York - Catskill Mtns.
Posts: 38,509
Horn, you are definitely going to do it. You sound disgusted - and ready.
__________________
You are so much more than the worst thing you've ever done. Fr. Greg Boyle

A little voice deep inside me said, "Hello, I am here." It was a small voice, & sounded as if it were buried underneath the cushions of my couch. It was my soul...I had forgotten it.

Hevyn is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Hevyn For This Useful Post:
Delilah1 (06-12-2018), least (06-12-2018), Lizajane (06-12-2018), thomas11 (06-13-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:48 PM   #8 (permalink)
Member
 
lessgravity's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,247
Can get it back, that swag, and more. You checked in the other day, after your drunk vacation. Have you been able to put it down or are you drinking now?
lessgravity is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to lessgravity For This Useful Post:
Delilah1 (06-12-2018), Lizajane (06-12-2018), Mango212 (06-12-2018), thomas11 (06-13-2018), tomsteve (06-13-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:52 PM   #9 (permalink)
Vietnam Vet
 
BDTL's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Georgia
Posts: 421
I know you can do it. This is your time so seize the day and put a solid plan into action to help you succeed. Pledge to yourself and your family that you are here forward living a new and better life. Find a support team who you can bounce ideas off of and whup this thing!
__________________
BDTL = Been Drinking Too Long!
Today is the first day of the rest of my Life!
Sobriety date 15 April 2018
BDTL is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to BDTL For This Useful Post:
Delilah1 (06-12-2018), Ladysadie (06-12-2018), Lizajane (06-12-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 06:54 PM   #10 (permalink)
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 178,370
Blog Entries: 1
Hi Horn

I agree with everybody who says you can be who you want to be. (Pretty sure the swag wasn't the clincher in the deal with your wife either - you seem like a good guy )

I think there's two parts to admitting you're an alcoholic - admitting it....and doing something about it.

Thought about what that second part might be for you yet?

D
__________________
Dee74 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
BDTL (06-13-2018), Delilah1 (06-12-2018), Ladysadie (06-12-2018), least (06-12-2018), Lizajane (06-12-2018), Mango212 (06-12-2018), thomas11 (06-13-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 07:23 PM   #11 (permalink)
Member
 
Lizajane's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jun 2018
Location: St Louis, MO
Posts: 539
Blog Entries: 11
Hey Horn! You can do this. The old you...is YOU...in a better place physically, emotionally and intellectually. Isn't it awesome that you have identified the cause of moving away from your optimal self? Like Dee said...what's next? Get your plan going. I think we waste too much time trying to find the perfect way to do this. There is no perfect way, but we need something. Don't be afraid of taking the wrong approach, you can switch it up. Just get something started. The first part of any plan is sobering up...it is not scary. In fact I found getting my head clear so refreshing. Embracing the advantages of a clear head and healing body have made me feel so much closer to my old self in just a week. Now I am making my plans and goals.
Lizajane is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Lizajane For This Useful Post:
BDTL (06-13-2018), Dee74 (06-12-2018), Delilah1 (06-12-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 10:21 PM   #12 (permalink)
Member
 
FreeOwl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 7,418
Quote:
Originally Posted by Horn95 View Post
Just tired of the squirrel cage. Tired of not being who I was, and what I can be. Same for all of us.

Was in LA meeting with people I had worked with before. And they talked about our great experiences. All I could do was barely control my anxiety. I want to be that guy again. With Swag (thatís how I won my wife), ability, vision.

I hate who I am right now.
In sobriety I'm a better man than I ever was before.....

You will be, too.

__________________
~ Life!! It's WAY too good to drink to! ~
FreeOwl is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to FreeOwl For This Useful Post:
BDTL (06-13-2018), Dee74 (06-12-2018), Delilah1 (06-12-2018), Mango212 (06-12-2018), thomas11 (06-13-2018)
Old 06-12-2018, 10:38 PM   #13 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 518
Horn, you can still be the man you are meant to be, swag and all. Look in the mirror at your awesomeness. You want to be behind your eyes, you want to be the incredible person you are. And you are! Just leave the sauce alone. You start now. We're here to say You Got This. It can be that simple, moment to moment. Grab this sobriety because you want it. It's worth fighting for. Forgive yourself and get back on track.
Ladysadie is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Ladysadie For This Useful Post:
BDTL (06-13-2018), Delilah1 (06-12-2018)
Old 06-13-2018, 12:26 PM   #14 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 752
Thanks everyone for the encouragement. It helps immensely.
Horn95 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Horn95 For This Useful Post:
BDTL (06-13-2018), Hevyn (06-13-2018), Mango212 (06-13-2018), ScottFromWI (06-13-2018)
Old 06-13-2018, 01:13 PM   #15 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: CA
Posts: 891
Isnít alcoholism cunning and baffling? We crave that next drink at times, yet we also know the destruction such a drink can cause. Iím trying to do something for my sobriety each day.
FreedomCA is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to FreedomCA For This Useful Post:
Mango212 (06-13-2018)
Old 06-13-2018, 01:20 PM   #16 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 752
Quote:
Originally Posted by FreedomCA View Post
Isnít alcoholism cunning and baffling? We crave that next drink at times, yet we also know the destruction such a drink can cause. Iím trying to do something for my sobriety each day.
.

Spot on.
Horn95 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-13-2018, 01:30 PM   #17 (permalink)
Member
 
lessgravity's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,247
Didn't answer my question.
lessgravity is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-13-2018, 01:47 PM   #18 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 752
Quote:
Originally Posted by lessgravity View Post
Didn't answer my question.
Sorry. I am sober right now. Actually went back to my journal and reread how great I was feeling about a month ago. It helped.

As for my plans, I had one, I just blew it off. Not this time though.
Horn95 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-13-2018, 01:49 PM   #19 (permalink)
Member
 
lessgravity's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,247
Good man.

Right your ship.
lessgravity is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-13-2018, 02:24 PM   #20 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 30
Battling an addiction and winning will make you a better man. We all know how hard this is.
Oneday04 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:59 AM.