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Old 06-11-2018, 04:29 AM
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Hiya, Iím new here. Just a bit of background info I am 25 years old and have been drinking since I was 15. When I was 15 I would literally have a drink at the weekends and that would be it, and by drink I mean like a WKD. When I was 17 I would have a bottle of wine on a weekend night. Then when I hit 18 and met my boyfriend at the time I started to drink a bottle of wine a night, then it got to a bottle and a half a night which I did for a couple of years but there were times where Iíd only drink at weekends. Anyway that relationship failed and I ended up with my current partner (who is amazing) and Iíve recently had a little boy. A year before I fell pregnant I was only drinking on weekends and then when I actually got pregnant I stayed sober the whole way through. He is now 4 months old and since heís been born Iíve been having a couple of bottles of wine a night I suppose I thought I was making up for lost time! Silly!!!! I am now going to stop again but I am petrified Iíve done lasting damage? Could I have after 6 and a half years of on off drinking? It is it quite rare!! I keep thinking Iím not going to see my baby grow up and I love him so much. The reason I have drank in the past and now is to help me sleep as I suffer terribly with anxiety and am on antidepressants for it and have been since I was 17. I worry if I donít sleep Iíll not be able to look after my son properly which is ironic as I donít know what. Makes me think being drunk in the evenings is any better than being tired. Just wanted to know if there was anyone in a similar situation to me? Dependant on alcohol to reduce anxiety and help aid sleep. Also how much were people drinking on here and for how long? With no lasting Ill effects? Iím petrified Iíve damaged myself so bad
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Old 06-11-2018, 07:02 AM
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Welcome to SR Herbie. I started drinking about the same time you did, but I kept going until I was in my early 40s - so I think it's fantastic that you are seeking help at such a young age. I truly wish I could have done so myself!

Almost all of us have been in a somewhat similar situation in that we were drinking more than we planned and that it was causing us problems. Exactly how much, what kind of alcohol or how often you drink is not really all that important. What is important is that you realize that it's a problem and that you are seeking help to quit and stay quit. As far as damage goes, our bodies are pretty resilient - but if you have concerns getting a checkup from your doctor is not a bad Idea. I did after I quit and while I had some issues none of them were life threatening and almost all have improved or gone away over time.

You have made a great choice and you'll find a lot of support and understanding here, hope you can stick around for a bit!
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Old 06-11-2018, 07:08 AM
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Welcome and I'm glad you are seeking support here.

As far as how much you've been drinking and possible damage, it varies from person to person. The best thing to do is to talk to your dr about your concerns.

And, yes, I drank to self-medicate anxiety/depression and it was insomnia that really took a toll on me. The problem is that alcohol adds to the problem, rather than solving it. There are healthy ways to deal with anxiety. And, it could be that your sleeping habits improve when you stop drinking.
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Old 06-11-2018, 07:20 AM
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welcome to SR!

I think I was drinking to deal with my anxiety and self medicating. When I quit I started exercising and that helped a lot with anxiety and also helped me sleep.

I didn't quit drinking until 35. I wish I quit at 25! You could always make a doctor appointment and talk to them about the anxiety.
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Old 06-11-2018, 09:30 AM
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Welcome to SR... everyone here is so wonderful and supportive.... and what I find most important most are non-judgemental, they, or I should say WE, know your struggle and know that doesnít make you a bad person. But by quitting you can be a BETTER person, especially because you have a young son to care for.... I canít imagine how I would have managed raising my kids if I drank in excess when they were young. But after they grew up and left the nest my drinking escalated, perhaps I was making up for lost time, I had my first child at 18 so as a college student I never drank or partied or had fun weekends like my friends without kids were having.

At least you recognize you have a problem and are looking for help... thatís probably the most important thing in quitting. By posting here, and reading othersí posts, can inspire you and give you confidence... YOU CAN QUIT!

You havenít mentioned if you are actually physically addicted. I drank off and on for years but was able to go weeks without it... then found myself drinking at night every night... then eventually found myself having the shakes in the morning. A swig or two of vodka would make them go away, but I had such an exhausting time waiting to be sober enough to drive to the store to get more for my secret stash, having that soothing swig as soon as I came home from the store... hours later shaking again, needing alcohol... my ďmedicineĒ. Hiding how bad I was addicted from my husband, he was still able to have a drink or two a night and go weeks without.

Iíve been anemic all my life so often had blood work, it got very bad as I got older and was finally diagnosed with endometriosis. The last few years Iíve had numerous blood transfusions, courses of weekly iron infusions, and frequent blood tests done. And I can access my medical records online, along with graphs showing each test result over the years. Even to my doctorís surprise when I finally confessed I used to drink a 750 ml of flavored vodka a day for several months at my very worst point, all tests that I had taken back then and since then showed liver functions were still always within normal range. Also had sonogram and CT scan on my liver/kidneys/gallbladder when I was mostly-sober for at least 6 months (minus a glass of wine or 2 on special occasions) but everything showed those were functioning fine.... yay Iíll celebrate by buying a bottle of vodka!

But of course every person is different, I was lucky I didnít seem to do permanent damage from drinking and I think that justified my reasoning when Iíd go on drinking binges for weeks when my endo pain got bad it was the only thing that helped me sleep, but fortunately I didnít get physically addicted again and could once again easily go weeks without a drink.

Please do visit a doctor and have tests done, being aware of whatís going on with your body really helps ease anxiety, even if they find something wrong you then know what youíre dealing with. And if you arenít yet physically addicted it will be so much easier to quit before that happens... if you are physically addicted Iíve read itís dangerous to quit without medical supervision.

Be a good role model for your son, be the sober mommy he deserves, youíre still young and have so much life ahead of you... you donít want to look back 20 years from now and realize you wasted your youth and your sonís youth, being drunk. Get better NOW before it gets worse... put aside the money you would normally spend on alcohol, wow it really adds up, then splurge on something special for you and your son.

YOU CAN DO IT!
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Old 06-11-2018, 09:38 AM
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I'm so glad you found us, Herbie. When I first came here I was in awe of all the wisdom, humor, & empathy. The people here helped me find the courage to change my life. (I'd been drinking 30 yrs.) We're happy you're here!
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Old 06-11-2018, 03:35 PM
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Hi and welcome Herbie

as scary as it is, the very best thing to do is see your Dr and have a checkup. You'll likely to find that things are not as bad as you fear

as far as sleep goes I used booze too, but after a sleepless night or two things got a lot better. Same with energy.

There are millions of people who have sleeping issues and are still good attentive parents.

Give it a week or two
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Old 06-11-2018, 05:17 PM
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The only way to know if you've done damage is to get tests done by your doctor. In the meantime, stop drinking and make a plan to stay sober.

I had blood tests done a while after I got sober, and everything came back alright. Get sober and get tested.
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Old 06-11-2018, 05:48 PM
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Hi and welcome to SR. I can assure you that both you and your child or future children will enjoy a much more rewarding and fulfilling life without alcohol. Especially if you think its a problem now. Alcoholism is progressive, it always gets worse. You are young , some of us were not so lucky and wasted 10,20,30 years drinking. I wish you the best.
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Old 06-11-2018, 07:24 PM
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Hi Herbie. Your addiction sounds a lot like mine — it started slowly enough, but every time I revisited alcohol, my consumption increased. A little over a year in, my sleep now is great and my anxiety has subsided, mostly; I control the remainder with exercise and an antidepressant. You've made a good move to seek support here
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:28 AM
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
Welcome to SR Herbie. I started drinking about the same time you did, but I kept going until I was in my early 40s - so I think it's fantastic that you are seeking help at such a young age. I truly wish I could have done so myself!

Almost all of us have been in a somewhat similar situation in that we were drinking more than we planned and that it was causing us problems. Exactly how much, what kind of alcohol or how often you drink is not really all that important. What is important is that you realize that it's a problem and that you are seeking help to quit and stay quit. As far as damage goes, our bodies are pretty resilient - but if you have concerns getting a checkup from your doctor is not a bad Idea. I did after I quit and while I had some issues none of them were life threatening and almost all have improved or gone away over time.

You have made a great choice and you'll find a lot of support and understanding here, hope you can stick around for a bit!
Thank you for the reply. The thing is with me id say I have more of a dependence on alcohol rather than an addiction. I depend on it to get me
to sleep so that Iím not up all night worrying about things because I suffer with health anxiety so I am constantly worried about my health which is ironic considering the amounts of alcohol Iíve been drinking is harmful to me. I can go without it and am not physically addicted, donít get withdrawals etc. I guess it just gives me a part of the day where I donít have to sit there and fight the demons in my head but itís a vicious cycle because I wake up the following morning feeling worried about my liver etc. Itís a total nightmare and wish I could just stop worrying all the time.

Thank you for yoUr response itís so nice having support!!! Xxx
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:30 AM
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Originally Posted by rascalwhiteoak View Post
Hi Herbie. Your addiction sounds a lot like mine ó it started slowly enough, but every time I revisited alcohol, my consumption increased. A little over a year in, my sleep now is great and my anxiety has subsided, mostly; I control the remainder with exercise and an antidepressant. You've made a good move to seek support here
Yeah thatís exactly what Iím doing right now Iím currently on mat leave so when I have a spare moment to myself (not looking after my 4 month old) while heís asleep, Iíd do my exercise dvd I slept well last night and no drink. Thanks for the response xxx
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:31 AM
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Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
Hi and welcome to SR. I can assure you that both you and your child or future children will enjoy a much more rewarding and fulfilling life without alcohol. Especially if you think its a problem now. Alcoholism is progressive, it always gets worse. You are young , some of us were not so lucky and wasted 10,20,30 years drinking. I wish you the best.
Thank you very much. Yes this is why I want to get support early rather than carrying it on and then having real problems in the future ! Feels soooo nice talking to people!! Xx
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:32 AM
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Originally Posted by least View Post
The only way to know if you've done damage is to get tests done by your doctor. In the meantime, stop drinking and make a plan to stay sober.

I had blood tests done a while after I got sober, and everything came back alright. Get sober and get tested.

Yeah thatís what Iím ganna do. Give it a month or two then get tested I donít want to yet as I know my numbers would probably be off the wall haha thank you xx
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:33 AM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
Hi and welcome Herbie

as scary as it is, the very best thing to do is see your Dr and have a checkup. You'll likely to find that things are not as bad as you fear

as far as sleep goes I used booze too, but after a sleepless night or two things got a lot better. Same with energy.

There are millions of people who have sleeping issues and are still good attentive parents.

Give it a week or two

Thank you that really helps. I build EVERYTHIG up in my head. I think to myself Ďsay if I never sleep and then I can focus and concentrate!í Itís pathetic. But luckily i think this little beautiful boy I have and the website is giving me the strength I need. I want to be around to see him go to school, get married, get his first job etc! So Iím determined now!!! Thank you xxx
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:34 AM
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Originally Posted by Hevyn View Post
I'm so glad you found us, Herbie. When I first came here I was in awe of all the wisdom, humor, & empathy. The people here helped me find the courage to change my life. (I'd been drinking 30 yrs.) We're happy you're here!

They are all SO lovely. Seriously the people on here seem nothing but supportive. Thank you so bloody much xxx
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:37 AM
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Originally Posted by Katzen View Post
Welcome to SR... everyone here is so wonderful and supportive.... and what I find most important most are non-judgemental, they, or I should say WE, know your struggle and know that doesnít make you a bad person. But by quitting you can be a BETTER person, especially because you have a young son to care for.... I canít imagine how I would have managed raising my kids if I drank in excess when they were young. But after they grew up and left the nest my drinking escalated, perhaps I was making up for lost time, I had my first child at 18 so as a college student I never drank or partied or had fun weekends like my friends without kids were having.

At least you recognize you have a problem and are looking for help... thatís probably the most important thing in quitting. By posting here, and reading othersí posts, can inspire you and give you confidence... YOU CAN QUIT!

You havenít mentioned if you are actually physically addicted. I drank off and on for years but was able to go weeks without it... then found myself drinking at night every night... then eventually found myself having the shakes in the morning. A swig or two of vodka would make them go away, but I had such an exhausting time waiting to be sober enough to drive to the store to get more for my secret stash, having that soothing swig as soon as I came home from the store... hours later shaking again, needing alcohol... my ďmedicineĒ. Hiding how bad I was addicted from my husband, he was still able to have a drink or two a night and go weeks without.

Iíve been anemic all my life so often had blood work, it got very bad as I got older and was finally diagnosed with endometriosis. The last few years Iíve had numerous blood transfusions, courses of weekly iron infusions, and frequent blood tests done. And I can access my medical records online, along with graphs showing each test result over the years. Even to my doctorís surprise when I finally confessed I used to drink a 750 ml of flavored vodka a day for several months at my very worst point, all tests that I had taken back then and since then showed liver functions were still always within normal range. Also had sonogram and CT scan on my liver/kidneys/gallbladder when I was mostly-sober for at least 6 months (minus a glass of wine or 2 on special occasions) but everything showed those were functioning fine.... yay Iíll celebrate by buying a bottle of vodka!

But of course every person is different, I was lucky I didnít seem to do permanent damage from drinking and I think that justified my reasoning when Iíd go on drinking binges for weeks when my endo pain got bad it was the only thing that helped me sleep, but fortunately I didnít get physically addicted again and could once again easily go weeks without a drink.

Please do visit a doctor and have tests done, being aware of whatís going on with your body really helps ease anxiety, even if they find something wrong you then know what youíre dealing with. And if you arenít yet physically addicted it will be so much easier to quit before that happens... if you are physically addicted Iíve read itís dangerous to quit without medical supervision.

Be a good role model for your son, be the sober mommy he deserves, youíre still young and have so much life ahead of you... you donít want to look back 20 years from now and realize you wasted your youth and your sonís youth, being drunk. Get better NOW before it gets worse... put aside the money you would normally spend on alcohol, wow it really adds up, then splurge on something special for you and your son.

YOU CAN DO IT!
Thank you for your words . I am not physically addicted no, but like you say... I donít want it to get to that point. I didnít drink last night and am not planning to. When I was pregnant I was much happier, less anxious... because I wasnít drinking for 9 months so my life felt normal and put together and I finally got my **** together. It gave me the kick I needed but now my son is giving me the kick I need and this website helps even further! I really hope I havenít done any damage it petrifies me xxx
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:39 AM
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Originally Posted by Midwest1981 View Post
welcome to SR!

I think I was drinking to deal with my anxiety and self medicating. When I quit I started exercising and that helped a lot with anxiety and also helped me sleep.

I didn't quit drinking until 35. I wish I quit at 25! You could always make a doctor appointment and talk to them about the anxiety.
Yesss I want to do it NOW before it then goes into my 30s. Iím CONVINCED I wonít make it another year even if I stop but Iíve been worried Iím dying my whole life haha! Drink is my enemy. When I was pregnant I felt MUCH better and less anxious as I wasnít drinking at all for 9 months. Iím going to do it again and have already started. No drink last night wooo! Xxx
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Anna View Post
Welcome and I'm glad you are seeking support here.

As far as how much you've been drinking and possible damage, it varies from person to person. The best thing to do is to talk to your dr about your concerns.

And, yes, I drank to self-medicate anxiety/depression and it was insomnia that really took a toll on me. The problem is that alcohol adds to the problem, rather than solving it. There are healthy ways to deal with anxiety. And, it could be that your sleeping habits improve when you stop drinking.
Yes alcohol defo makes EVERYTHIG so much worse and heightens anxiety tenfold. I am on antidepressants too and have been for years so the combination probably isnít great because all the benefits the antidepressants are doing is being taken away by the alcohol. Drink free last night and I plan to stay that way. Thanks for your advice
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Old 06-12-2018, 03:41 AM
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
Welcome to SR Herbie. I started drinking about the same time you did, but I kept going until I was in my early 40s - so I think it's fantastic that you are seeking help at such a young age. I truly wish I could have done so myself!

Almost all of us have been in a somewhat similar situation in that we were drinking more than we planned and that it was causing us problems. Exactly how much, what kind of alcohol or how often you drink is not really all that important. What is important is that you realize that it's a problem and that you are seeking help to quit and stay quit. As far as damage goes, our bodies are pretty resilient - but if you have concerns getting a checkup from your doctor is not a bad Idea. I did after I quit and while I had some issues none of them were life threatening and almost all have improved or gone away over time.

You have made a great choice and you'll find a lot of support and understanding here, hope you can stick around for a bit!
Thank you very much yes Iím going to get tested in a couple of months. I feel SO much better not drinking last night xxx
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