someday147

back on day one. Joined a tennis club met alot of new people as was part of my plan of recovery get away from old friends and habits etc. After playing everyone went to the club bar. I decided to go up and try and socialise and meet people ordered a coke and sat for a while however I was so quiet and anxious as alcohol has always been my tool for social situations have otherwise avoided them except when drinking. I resisted for a while but eventually somebody offered to buy me a beer and i succumbed. Ended up drinking from 5pm to 7am. Feel like hell today but not drinking at least. Think I will just have to avoid social situations until I am alot further down the sobriety path and have hopefully learned how to socialise without alcohol.

Hopeful528

Keep trying. Stay on course.
Remember how bad it feels right now so that it will help you on your journey forward.
When is your original sobriety date? and what is your recovery plan?

iwilltryagain

Don't beat yourself on it. We know we cannot stop once we start. Take that as another proof. Pick yourself up and move on...get back on the schedule. Appreciate that you took responsibility and admitted it.

Once a wise person said - If you sit long enough in a barber shop you will get a hair cut. Next time have an escape plan or just leave.

I almost struggle with this every weekend. I am in early stages of recovery. I try to dodge all the parties and ****. Making my sobriety as a priority.

Do it one day at a time...

Hopeful528

Sometimes you have to innocently learn the hard way the things that they teach about early sobriety, and how to live sober now. Like not being around people places or things involved with alcohol.
I would think of new activites that involve NONDRINKERS, in a non drinking environment and know that your sobriety comes before going to any events or places or joining groups that drink. Its not worth it. A good learning experience. Add it to your not to do and trigger list.
We learn through our journey so start anew and get out your recovery plan

biminiblue

You had all good intentions. Making new friends. Picking up a new hobby.

I think the tennis is a great plan. Someday you will be able to go to a bar and not drink alcohol - maybe just not yet.

I went to bars and was okay - BUT! I had made the decision to not drink no matter what - AND I didn't go if the main reason was just to drink and socialize.

For instance: if people wanted to meet at a bar just for drinks, I would go on home. If they wanted to get a meal, I'd go and eat and then excuse myself after eating and before the drinkers got on a roll.

Same with other events. If it's a BBQ with a kegger? Sometimes I'll just pass, since BBQs tend to take way too long to get to the food part. Seems BBQ to some people means, "Pre-drink, drink some more, maybe get around to food around 11PM." I just pass on those block parties and parties at drinkers' houses. I can eat at home without dodging all the intoxicated people. It's not that fun at all to watch people become annoying

So I always have an escape plan. If there is a reason for me to be there (like someone's birthday who I love) then I go, but if it becomes uncomfortable for me for ANY reason, I leave. You can make several statements that have nothing to do with alcohol when you leave. Think about what you'll say ahead of time.

someday147

23rd of may was my date was on day 18 I think. My recovery plan has been going to AA which I started the other day also going to GA for another addiction. Seeing a counsellor and going to weekly 1 to 1 addiction therapy. I have a recovery plan made out which includes daily - walking, healthy eating, reading a book on recovery for at least half an hour, writing in and reading over my journal for at least half an hour, watching a comedy for at least half an hour, reading and on posting on SR for at least half an hour, meditating for at least half an hour, also have a list of things I do frequently - jogging, tennis, working out, cooking and seeing family.

someday147

Thanks for the replies everyone Yeah I will be avoiding any drinking situations from now on not worth the risk

Hopeful528

I've had similar experiences. Having no intention to drink and then next thing you know that's where we are. Or going somewhere with no intention and then it happening. That's the power of the illness.
It can feel devastating. But we learn. We grow. We become more aware. And we dust off and move forward. Stronger and knowing more. It sounds like you had good intentions and were doing good things by joining the tennis group, and your here today so don't beat yourself up too hard.

Hopeful528

Good for you, those all sound really great.

Hopeful528

Yes, I think its too much in early sobriety.
Something you can make a personal decision on way later but not yet.
I learned in the same way.
I don't care now who's event it is, or what it is, I don't go yet. Because really not to say that people don't enjoy our company or anything, but everyone will have a good time with or without us there. But it is me who will pay tomorrow, so it is not worth it.

D122y

some,

After the physical addiction was gone (about 1 month) the mental addiction ramped up.

The craving was incessant and peaked during my typical crave/drinking times/occasions.

It took many months to see a noticeable change in that. Even after 1 year clean, there were/are weaknesses in my sober life.

I am coming up on my 3rd trying at over 1 year clean. I consider myself sober for over 3 years, but for most folks here that count, typically even 1 knowing shot resets the clock.

I won't drink over it. The less we drink towards total abstinence the better.


Thanks.