| Cobber3 | 06-07-2018 07:42 AM |
200 days sober!!!!!
This morning is a pretty cool one. I woke up at 7:00 (which would not happen if I was drinking) and got my sons ready for school. My oldest was watching a on Babe Ruth and talked about how he had problems with drinking and my son asked me how long it has been since daddy had a beer. I pulled up my counter and showed him today was day 200 and his little face lit up like it’s been 8 years and he was so happy. To think about how much your life can change in 200 days is just befuddling. 201 days ago I woke up with extremely intense anxiety from withdrawing from a 5 day bender and today my life couldn’t be anymore different. My wife tells me on a daily basis how happy she is to be married to me and it used to be she lived in constant fear, not knowing what guy she was going to get around 9:00 at night. Don’t get me wrong, I still go through little PAWS battles but they are getting less intense and farther apart. I had anxiety yesterday just talking to a guy at the drive thru and I had to remind myself that when I feel these feelings, opposed to thinking I can make them go away with the sauce. I now embrace them as I know my body/mind are changing for the better. I do more in a week now then I used to do in a month easy. Long story short, beer for me, not only robbed my family from this guy but it also robbed me of my potential and the happiness I get to feel on a daily basis.
In the grand scheme of things, 200 days is just a drop in the bucket and I can’t imagine/wait for 600 days. If you’re just quitting or making the effort to turn your life around, it IS possible. You’re going to have to suffer a bit a bit to get what you want is what I’ve learned through all of this. The old adage “nothing comes easy”. The way I look at it now and I hope it can speak to someone who is where I’ve been, having a tough time and knowing the answering is to put down the drink for good. I suffered on a daily basis, wake up hungover, try and make it through the day, watching the clock trying not to crack a beer until 5:00, or feeling weird physically and mentally if I didn’t have any beer past 5:00, I chose to suffer then with not positive outcome. Now I choose to suffer a little bit here and there with all the light at the end of the tunnel. Either way, if it’s day 1 or 26 or whatever and your brain and body are giving you hell. Just remember the suffer you put yourself through willingly to be a drunk and think about all the good that will come from this tiny bit of suffer in sobriety. I love you all and hope everyone’s well.
Cheers,
James | 