Weekender 7-11 June2018
Marchia in Aeternum
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 11,094
That's an interesting question, Trach.
No. Not when I am in the ring.
Rather when I am at home and thinking "What am I doing this for?"
It's like two different realities for me.
No. Not when I am in the ring.
Rather when I am at home and thinking "What am I doing this for?"
It's like two different realities for me.
So, treat it like a bout. Plan. Know why you're stepping in the ring. Everyday for me it's about collecting money. My jobs what most people would call a misery. It gets me steady income and traction in the local job market. That why I do it. I know that every day.
So plan. Know. Do. Step in the ring.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,859
Originally Posted by MantaLady 
Morning All, just had breakfast on the first day at rehab. Bit overwhelmed as I live on my own so having so many people around when I get up is something I am going to have to get used to lol. Had a counselling session yesterday on a few hours after I arrived and counseller is from Australia, seems like a nice chap. It's going to take a while being comfortable talking to someone in person too. I have meditation in 20 minutes then we do gratitude and get a 30 minute break then a 2 hour group therapy session. I have an exercise to do now where I have to do a roadmap of my life, noting all the good the bad and the ugly things that have happened along the way, I will start that in my freetime this afternoon. Then at 4pm there is a womens group which will be a bit odd for me as I don't really do that sort of thing and have very few female friends so another thing I will have to throw myself into and get out of my comfort zone with. I signed up for something else at 6pm about triggers, not really sure what it's about but I am going to give everything a try.
It's hot, I have 8 very swollen mossie bites and are dog tired due to time difference. Well, got to love you and leave you all, off for meditation. Take care all and be good xx
It's hot, I have 8 very swollen mossie bites and are dog tired due to time difference. Well, got to love you and leave you all, off for meditation. Take care all and be good xx
Very impressive move.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,859
Originally Posted by MantaLady
Hi again everyone.
MB - I am down for 30 days but can make a decision the week before the end of the month on if I want to do 60. This is good as I can just concentrate on the immediate stuff.
Venus - the Food is absoutely fantastic, all organic fresh and really tasty
Today's itenery was meditation first thing then gratitude, then breakfast and a 30 minute break and a 2 hour group session, break for lunch and then a mindfullness session, we then popped out to Monkey Hill where there are hundreds of monkeys running around an old temple, some of them chased you and snatch your stuff off you!!, and then an NA meeting where someone shared their story which was pretty powerful stuff.
I am struggling with it all to be honest, I have gone right into my shell, can't really speak and are paranoid. I have had to speak in front of a group of people (at least 15 people) multiple times today, this makes me sick to my stomach and most of the sessions I have spent shaking with fear of when the next time I am put on the spot is going to be. I just don't know what to say. Just typing this out now has made me cry when all day I have felt nothing other than fear, my fight or flight instinct is well and truly switched on the flight mode. I knew I had low self esteem and confidence but hear it is magnified and I just want to cry and hide away. I am purposely sat outside in the designated area where you can use your phone or computer so at least I am not shutting myself in my room. Everyone else is sat round the other side laughing and joking and all seem to know what to say, come up with the right phrases about recovery etc and I feel so inadqequate.
I am going to have a darn good cry tonight and hope that this feeling passes or is just something normal that people go through.
Take care everyone and be good xx
MB - I am down for 30 days but can make a decision the week before the end of the month on if I want to do 60. This is good as I can just concentrate on the immediate stuff.
Venus - the Food is absoutely fantastic, all organic fresh and really tasty
Today's itenery was meditation first thing then gratitude, then breakfast and a 30 minute break and a 2 hour group session, break for lunch and then a mindfullness session, we then popped out to Monkey Hill where there are hundreds of monkeys running around an old temple, some of them chased you and snatch your stuff off you!!, and then an NA meeting where someone shared their story which was pretty powerful stuff.
I am struggling with it all to be honest, I have gone right into my shell, can't really speak and are paranoid. I have had to speak in front of a group of people (at least 15 people) multiple times today, this makes me sick to my stomach and most of the sessions I have spent shaking with fear of when the next time I am put on the spot is going to be. I just don't know what to say. Just typing this out now has made me cry when all day I have felt nothing other than fear, my fight or flight instinct is well and truly switched on the flight mode. I knew I had low self esteem and confidence but hear it is magnified and I just want to cry and hide away. I am purposely sat outside in the designated area where you can use your phone or computer so at least I am not shutting myself in my room. Everyone else is sat round the other side laughing and joking and all seem to know what to say, come up with the right phrases about recovery etc and I feel so inadqequate.
I am going to have a darn good cry tonight and hope that this feeling passes or is just something normal that people go through.
Take care everyone and be good xx
Can you practice some deep breathing? It may help.
Although one would never know it based upon my SR time/posts, I am very quiet and somewhat shy in real life. SR is a great outlet; lean on us any time.
Keeping you in my thoughts.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
1558 visiting "guests" on this site right now.
That seems to be a pretty average number.
Prayers going out to all of you who are lurkers.
I hope you'll decide to step in and speak. It changes everything from a deep shameful secret, to a solution-based project.
That seems to be a pretty average number.
Prayers going out to all of you who are lurkers.
I hope you'll decide to step in and speak. It changes everything from a deep shameful secret, to a solution-based project.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,859
Originally Posted by biminiblue
We used to roll this thread (500 posts) on the regular by Saturday morning.
More posts the better, I say.
From my walk yesterday: The Edmonds ferry as it departs. Huge negative tide yesterday, too.
More posts the better, I say.
From my walk yesterday: The Edmonds ferry as it departs. Huge negative tide yesterday, too.
It is quite a problem at times here. Makes it impossible to sit on the beach when present.
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,187
Originally Posted by SoberLeigh
Do you get Red Tide (an algae bloom) where you are, big?
It is quite a problem at times here. Makes it impossible to sit on the beach when present.
It is quite a problem at times here. Makes it impossible to sit on the beach when present.
This is not my pic but this is a part of the canal east of me called the Limehouse Cut, not far from the Olympic stadium.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 1,951
Originally Posted by MantaLady
Hi again everyone.
MB - I am down for 30 days but can make a decision the week before the end of the month on if I want to do 60. This is good as I can just concentrate on the immediate stuff.
Venus - the Food is absoutely fantastic, all organic fresh and really tasty
Today's itenery was meditation first thing then gratitude, then breakfast and a 30 minute break and a 2 hour group session, break for lunch and then a mindfullness session, we then popped out to Monkey Hill where there are hundreds of monkeys running around an old temple, some of them chased you and snatch your stuff off you!!, and then an NA meeting where someone shared their story which was pretty powerful stuff.
I am struggling with it all to be honest, I have gone right into my shell, can't really speak and are paranoid. I have had to speak in front of a group of people (at least 15 people) multiple times today, this makes me sick to my stomach and most of the sessions I have spent shaking with fear of when the next time I am put on the spot is going to be. I just don't know what to say. Just typing this out now has made me cry when all day I have felt nothing other than fear, my fight or flight instinct is well and truly switched on the flight mode. I knew I had low self esteem and confidence but hear it is magnified and I just want to cry and hide away. I am purposely sat outside in the designated area where you can use your phone or computer so at least I am not shutting myself in my room. Everyone else is sat round the other side laughing and joking and all seem to know what to say, come up with the right phrases about recovery etc and I feel so inadqequate.
I am going to have a darn good cry tonight and hope that this feeling passes or is just something normal that people go through.
Take care everyone and be good xx
MB - I am down for 30 days but can make a decision the week before the end of the month on if I want to do 60. This is good as I can just concentrate on the immediate stuff.
Venus - the Food is absoutely fantastic, all organic fresh and really tasty
Today's itenery was meditation first thing then gratitude, then breakfast and a 30 minute break and a 2 hour group session, break for lunch and then a mindfullness session, we then popped out to Monkey Hill where there are hundreds of monkeys running around an old temple, some of them chased you and snatch your stuff off you!!, and then an NA meeting where someone shared their story which was pretty powerful stuff.
I am struggling with it all to be honest, I have gone right into my shell, can't really speak and are paranoid. I have had to speak in front of a group of people (at least 15 people) multiple times today, this makes me sick to my stomach and most of the sessions I have spent shaking with fear of when the next time I am put on the spot is going to be. I just don't know what to say. Just typing this out now has made me cry when all day I have felt nothing other than fear, my fight or flight instinct is well and truly switched on the flight mode. I knew I had low self esteem and confidence but hear it is magnified and I just want to cry and hide away. I am purposely sat outside in the designated area where you can use your phone or computer so at least I am not shutting myself in my room. Everyone else is sat round the other side laughing and joking and all seem to know what to say, come up with the right phrases about recovery etc and I feel so inadqequate.
I am going to have a darn good cry tonight and hope that this feeling passes or is just something normal that people go through.
Take care everyone and be good xx
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,187
Morning MB.
It has just got windy here, outliers of Storm Hector which has arrived in the north and west of the country. It will not be too bad down here in London and since i'm not going out it will not affect me at all.
It has just got windy here, outliers of Storm Hector which has arrived in the north and west of the country. It will not be too bad down here in London and since i'm not going out it will not affect me at all.
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,187
Originally Posted by MidnightBlue
Morning, Sao.
Stay warm and safe.
How's your man's flu?
Stay warm and safe.
How's your man's flu?
I'm a man, barely alive.
Edit: The weather in London has changed out of recognition since I was young so I think you're right Vman.
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