Rar

I'm having a tough time - but so far, need a little boost to get me through the day.

After our house closing yesterday, my husband was unloading some things from our car to the new house. It started to rain, so he pulled the car into the garage with the rear hatch open. There wasn't enough clearance, so it smashed the rear window on MY car to smitherines. I managed to not drink.

This morning, my old cat began panting and drooling. Husband and I took him to the vets and while in the waiting room, our cat died in my husband's arms.

I've been crying from everything - my car, my cat and the pain I'm in from my surgery. I'm not drinking. I just want to feel better. I'm posting because I might be tempted especially when my husband starts to drink in a little while.

lessgravity

Oh Rar, what a s---ty couple days. I'm so sorry to hear about your cat, I've lost many a family pet and it's always the saddest.

That said, we know what drinking will do. It will make that pain go away, maybe, for a fleeting afternoon and then bring in its wake the ugly and familiar pain and suffering and anxiety that is its twin.

Nothing will be solved or resolved, you will just be back on the hamster wheel again.

Ride the urges and know they will pass. Worst case, give yourself permission to drink tomorrow, in my worst cravings that seems to work.

You know you have it in you to face life with sobriety. Give that simple gift to yourself in this difficult time.

Check in with us later. Pulling for you.

aasharon90

Im sorry to hear that many of life's situations
are overloading on you right now. However,
the most important thing to do and in which
you did, was come here to share what's happening
right now and that you need our support, an ear,
a shoulder, all in which can offer emotional support
for you instead of reaching for poison that won't
make anything better.

Reach for your Higher Power or your strongest
Faith high above you in prayer for serenity, calmness
and some sense of peace, strength and understanding.

Rely on Him and us and find the courage
and willingness to do the next best thing
and not to pick up alcohol to numb the pain.

We are here for you Rar.

biminiblue

Aww. Sorry about the kitty. I just had to put down my 19YO cat a couple weeks back - it's sad...I now think of him in a beautiful garden with flowers and butterflies he can actually catch.

I've done that exact same thing with my car. D'oh.

You can make it through this, Rar. A drink will make everything exponentially worse.

Hey, congrats on the Real Estate closing. That's good news.

tekink

Resetting that clock never gives the results you desire from it. It tends to make things all the harder and stretch out all the mental anguish that initial sobriety brings.

Sorry to hear about your kitty,. The car is just an accident, things happen. Insurance should take care of that? I back into an unexpected recycle bin not to long ago and took out the back window in my hatchback.

Bird615

Remember to think the drink through, what price will you pay for some fleeting momentary relief? Going through these things sober can lead you become better able to cope with events that hurt and are difficult, while drinking will only set you back again.

As painful as life is feeling right now, you will feel better again.

ProfessorD

Oh, Rar I'm so sorry. R.I.P. sweet kitty. At least he died quickly, and so he didn't suffer?

So glad you are not drinking. What a strong and empowering decision to make in the face of tragedy and difficult times. I wish you peace.

Ladysadie

Rar - so sorry to hear your beloved kitty passed. Heartfelt condolences to you.

As for your car, such a crush on top of everything. If it's any consolation, when I got my dream car SUV I scratched the back of it with the garage door three times. I have a $1000 deductible, each time it was that much to repair (no drinking was involved at any of those times, just my own thoughtlessness). Sending you hugs!!

MantaLady

Bless you Rar, so sorry about your little friend but as Bim says he/she is in a land of flowers with butterflies that can be caught! Keep strong, be brave, you have got this Rar!! Sending you big hugs from across the pond xx

StellaBlu

Rar, so sorry about your kitty. It's very sad to hear that. My thoughts are with you.

icewater1961

Rar, hugs to you! I still feel the pain of losing animals. For so many years I had dogs and horses and two cats. I hope they are waiting for me now. I don't want to go to heaven or over the rainbow bridge if there are no animals there. I don't want to sound morbid but I feel your pain. But think about it, was it not better to have loved and lost than not loved at all? The car... stuff happens. That's just metal and shards of glass and surely can be fixed? Certainly not worth drinking over.

Rar

Thanks Everyone - still not drinking, though my husband has started. I expected that though. He's gone over to the new house with another load of stuff, so at least he won't be drinking in front of me for awhile.

I feel like I'm in a daze and not having any bad cravings (yet). Kitty did go quick. He never even got to see the vet. It must have disturbed the other folks in the waiting room to have him die on the spot. My husband said, "Is he dead? I think he's dead." and everyone looked at us. I do wonder if the trauma of the car ride and the smell of the vet's office accelerated his death. I can't think of that though. There was no other way.

The car will be okay. We have full glass coverage with no deductible, so that's good!

I've already reset my days and now have 22 days since the brief relapse. I don't want or plan to reset again. Once again, I appreciate the boost. I'm hanging in there...>I just want to feel better. I expect tomorrow to be better. Thanks everyone. ((HUGS))

SoberLeigh

Oh, Rar; I am so sorry to hear about your cat.

Our beloved pets just don't live long enough, do they.

Sending you love and warm thoughts, dear one.

SoberLeigh

I am so sorry to hear about your cat, too, Bim.

Love and hugs.

Rar

I'm sorry for the loss of your kitty BB . ((HUGS)) . 19 years is a long time. My kitty was 15.

2muchpain

Rar, I'm very sorry for all that you're going through, especially your cat. But I'm sure you gave your cat a great life and is off to a beautiful place. Just try to hang in there. Wishing you the best. John

ProfessorD

Rar, you did everything you could for your kitty. He died in your husband's arms. Even if he didn't like the car ride and the vet, you had to take him there. You might have saved him! And he was with both of you when he passed. So sorry for your loss.

Dee74

I'm sorry for your loss Rar - but cherish the memories.
Many years ago now, but I still really regret getting drunk when my pet died.

I hope you can fix the car as soon as too

Rar

Well, I made it through the day without drinking. Surprisingly I didn't even feel like drinking, though I did have thoughts that at least I might feel better for a little while. The memory of how awful I felt in having to reset my sober clock is still fresh and was incentive enough to not drink. I am very depressed today and have much to do regarding the move. I am unmotivated and not caring much about anything. . I still have to deal with the litter box and give away stuff that can be used by other cat owners. So - onward to another day.

August252015

Thinking of you Rar, especially with losing a beloved pet- one dog of mine in particular is still desperately missed (and he passed 7 years ago).

Great job on staying sober yesterday. Take care of yourself, be gentle, just for today. You can keep going sober.