Lost
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 18
This is very helpful thank you
Originally Posted by Hopeful528 
Here is a FWD from a post someone left that I found helpful in explaining how i kept going back to it.
Now I'm going to be quiet and let the elder wisers chime in. But know you're not alone, and keep coming back. Congratulate yourself on making a big step and reaching out.
Hi Hopeful,
I am glad you are feeling better. From one of your earlier posts I picked up that you can last about 30 days on meetings alone. My limit was 21 days. Then the obsession returned.
When that happens, the last thing I was going to do was call anyone. It is fundamental to the AA experience that at certain times we will have no effective mental defence against the first drink, which means we will not call anyone. By the time the obsession comes back, it is too late.
My suggestion, don’t wait thirty days to start the steps. Get into them with a sponsor tomorrow, or today even. We take the steps to recover, not the other way around.
A passage from the big book, “ neither we nor any human power could provide such a defence. It had to come from a Higher Power” that is the purpose of the steps, to put you in direct contact with a Power greater than yourself that will solve your problem.
My experience wa that the moment I sincerely began seeking the higher power through the steps, the obsession was lifted.
The practice of calling others is very useful as a regular habit. It may help you avoid getting into a position where a drink is on the cards. It is what you do today that will keep you sober. If you call someone, work on a step, go to a meeting, try and help someone else, if you do that today, chances are you will be ok tomorrow.
If you want to wait until you neeeeeed to call, it will be too late. Chances are you won’t see the relapse coming. I never did, though I could always see how it happened in hindsight.
__________________
Mike.
It is not change that is painful, it is the resistance to change
All BB quotes from 1st Edition.
Now I'm going to be quiet and let the elder wisers chime in. But know you're not alone, and keep coming back. Congratulate yourself on making a big step and reaching out.
Hi Hopeful,
I am glad you are feeling better. From one of your earlier posts I picked up that you can last about 30 days on meetings alone. My limit was 21 days. Then the obsession returned.
When that happens, the last thing I was going to do was call anyone. It is fundamental to the AA experience that at certain times we will have no effective mental defence against the first drink, which means we will not call anyone. By the time the obsession comes back, it is too late.
My suggestion, don’t wait thirty days to start the steps. Get into them with a sponsor tomorrow, or today even. We take the steps to recover, not the other way around.
A passage from the big book, “ neither we nor any human power could provide such a defence. It had to come from a Higher Power” that is the purpose of the steps, to put you in direct contact with a Power greater than yourself that will solve your problem.
My experience wa that the moment I sincerely began seeking the higher power through the steps, the obsession was lifted.
The practice of calling others is very useful as a regular habit. It may help you avoid getting into a position where a drink is on the cards. It is what you do today that will keep you sober. If you call someone, work on a step, go to a meeting, try and help someone else, if you do that today, chances are you will be ok tomorrow.
If you want to wait until you neeeeeed to call, it will be too late. Chances are you won’t see the relapse coming. I never did, though I could always see how it happened in hindsight.
__________________
Mike.
It is not change that is painful, it is the resistance to change
All BB quotes from 1st Edition.
I am McLovin'
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Santa Clara, CA
Posts: 144
Welcome Firewire and good for you for reaching out.
Speaking from my own experience, I remember the first times I reached out both online and in person, and I felt so lost, hopeless, and stuck in my addiction. In retrospect, any and all the steps I took towards recovery, even if they didn't feel like it at the time, were significant in inching me towards a life free from drugs and alcohol.
Some great examples so far, and be sure to pursue sobriety with as much vigor and enthusiasm as you can, it will pay off.
Some suggestions (some may echo other posters):
- Be (really) honest with your therapist, they are there to help you.
- Start journaling every day, be brutally honest with yourself.
- Look into recovery programs and face-to-face meetings: AA, SMART, Refuge Recovery, and anything else in your area. Attend as many as you can.
- Consider IOP (intensive outpatient) programs, some insurance plans (like Kaiser & other major providers if you have them) cover most if not all of the costs.
- Check in with this site every day (join a daily support thread)
- Listen to and/or watch recovery podcasts (easily available on YouTube/elsewhere)
- Put together a daily schedule that you can adhere to (walk the dog, water garden, exercise, whatever fits your lifestyle)
- Reach out to good friends/family that you feel comfortable discussing your recovery efforts with.
- Consider any and all suggestions you get from others in recovery, esp. those with some sober time.
- Remember that this isn't easily, but entirely possible. Prepare to dig your heels in and take a stand in the pursuit of a better life.
- Do not entertain the idea of throwing in the towel, do not allow yourself to ruminate on the negative or your own pity.
Do as many of the above as you can (including others suggestions) and I think you'll be on your way :-)
Speaking from my own experience, I remember the first times I reached out both online and in person, and I felt so lost, hopeless, and stuck in my addiction. In retrospect, any and all the steps I took towards recovery, even if they didn't feel like it at the time, were significant in inching me towards a life free from drugs and alcohol.
Some great examples so far, and be sure to pursue sobriety with as much vigor and enthusiasm as you can, it will pay off.
Some suggestions (some may echo other posters):
- Be (really) honest with your therapist, they are there to help you.
- Start journaling every day, be brutally honest with yourself.
- Look into recovery programs and face-to-face meetings: AA, SMART, Refuge Recovery, and anything else in your area. Attend as many as you can.
- Consider IOP (intensive outpatient) programs, some insurance plans (like Kaiser & other major providers if you have them) cover most if not all of the costs.
- Check in with this site every day (join a daily support thread)
- Listen to and/or watch recovery podcasts (easily available on YouTube/elsewhere)
- Put together a daily schedule that you can adhere to (walk the dog, water garden, exercise, whatever fits your lifestyle)
- Reach out to good friends/family that you feel comfortable discussing your recovery efforts with.
- Consider any and all suggestions you get from others in recovery, esp. those with some sober time.
- Remember that this isn't easily, but entirely possible. Prepare to dig your heels in and take a stand in the pursuit of a better life.
- Do not entertain the idea of throwing in the towel, do not allow yourself to ruminate on the negative or your own pity.
Do as many of the above as you can (including others suggestions) and I think you'll be on your way :-)
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 18
That’s awesome thank you - gives me a lot of hope to hear from people who are fighting through this. Im scared of what’s happening here but I know I need to be focused and really commit to beating this, it’s great to here from you guys and thank you again.
QUOTE=tesquizito;6906106]Welcome Firewire and good for you for reaching out.
Speaking from my own experience, I remember the first times I reached out both online and in person, and I felt so lost, hopeless, and stuck in my addiction. In retrospect, any and all the steps I took towards recovery, even if they didn't feel like it at the time, were significant in inching me towards a life free from drugs and alcohol.
Some great examples so far, and be sure to pursue sobriety with as much vigor and enthusiasm as you can, it will pay off.
Some suggestions (some may echo other posters):
- Be (really) honest with your therapist, they are there to help you.
- Start journaling every day, be brutally honest with yourself.
- Look into recovery programs and face-to-face meetings: AA, SMART, Refuge Recovery, and anything else in your area. Attend as many as you can.
- Check in with this site every day (join a daily support thread)
- Listen to and/or watch recovery podcasts (easily available on YouTube/elsewhere)
- Put together a daily schedule that you can adhere to (walk the dog, water garden, exercise, whatever fits your lifestyle)
- Reach out to good friends/family that you feel comfortable discussing your recovery efforts with.
- Consider any and all suggestions you get from others in recovery, esp. those with some sober time.
- Remember that this isn't easily, but entirely possible. Prepare to dig your heels in and take a stand in the pursuit of a better life.
- Do not entertain the idea of throwing in the towel, do not allow yourself to ruminate on the negative or your own pity.
Do as many of the above as you can (including others suggestions) and I think you'll be on your way :-)
[/QUOTE]
QUOTE=tesquizito;6906106]Welcome Firewire and good for you for reaching out.
Speaking from my own experience, I remember the first times I reached out both online and in person, and I felt so lost, hopeless, and stuck in my addiction. In retrospect, any and all the steps I took towards recovery, even if they didn't feel like it at the time, were significant in inching me towards a life free from drugs and alcohol.
Some great examples so far, and be sure to pursue sobriety with as much vigor and enthusiasm as you can, it will pay off.
Some suggestions (some may echo other posters):
- Be (really) honest with your therapist, they are there to help you.
- Start journaling every day, be brutally honest with yourself.
- Look into recovery programs and face-to-face meetings: AA, SMART, Refuge Recovery, and anything else in your area. Attend as many as you can.
- Check in with this site every day (join a daily support thread)
- Listen to and/or watch recovery podcasts (easily available on YouTube/elsewhere)
- Put together a daily schedule that you can adhere to (walk the dog, water garden, exercise, whatever fits your lifestyle)
- Reach out to good friends/family that you feel comfortable discussing your recovery efforts with.
- Consider any and all suggestions you get from others in recovery, esp. those with some sober time.
- Remember that this isn't easily, but entirely possible. Prepare to dig your heels in and take a stand in the pursuit of a better life.
- Do not entertain the idea of throwing in the towel, do not allow yourself to ruminate on the negative or your own pity.
Do as many of the above as you can (including others suggestions) and I think you'll be on your way :-)
[/QUOTE]
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Firewire, you said you really liked that long post by Hopeful - (and Mike aka Gottalife)
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ml#post6906054 (Lost)
Have you read the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous?
Here is a direct link to the online "Alcoholics Anonymous" book and their "12 X 12"
https://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/read-...lve-traditions
(Linked with permission of) Copyright © 2018 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ml#post6906054 (Lost)
Have you read the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous?
Here is a direct link to the online "Alcoholics Anonymous" book and their "12 X 12"
https://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/read-...lve-traditions
(Linked with permission of) Copyright © 2018 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 18
No I haven’t - I will download now and get reading. Appreciate the reccomendation and will take on board everything I can,
Originally Posted by biminiblue
Firewire, you said you really liked that long post by Hopeful -
Have you read the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous?
Here is a direct link to the online "Alcoholics Anonymous" book and their "12
(Linked with permission of) Copyright © 2018 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Have you read the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous?
Here is a direct link to the online "Alcoholics Anonymous" book and their "12
(Linked with permission of) Copyright © 2018 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
It's great to have you with us Firewire.
I knew in my 30's that I was too dependent on alcohol, but I chose to try & manage it myself. As a result, years later I was drinking every day - with a ruined life. When I found SR I was immediately comforted by the caring support I received. Everyone understood what I was going through. Knowing I was no longer alone really helped with the anxiety & fear I was feeling.
I'm so glad you see what needs to be done & are taking action. You'll never regret taking this step.
I knew in my 30's that I was too dependent on alcohol, but I chose to try & manage it myself. As a result, years later I was drinking every day - with a ruined life. When I found SR I was immediately comforted by the caring support I received. Everyone understood what I was going through. Knowing I was no longer alone really helped with the anxiety & fear I was feeling.
I'm so glad you see what needs to be done & are taking action. You'll never regret taking this step.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 18
Thank you again and I am so glad
To hear that you were able to move forward- hoping I can too. I know that I’m headed down a very bad path at the moment and being here gives me hope that I can change that.
To hear that you were able to move forward- hoping I can too. I know that I’m headed down a very bad path at the moment and being here gives me hope that I can change that.
Originally Posted by Hevyn
It's great to have you with us Firewire.
I knew in my 30's that I was too dependent on alcohol, but I chose to try & manage it myself. As a result, years later I was drinking every day - with a ruined life. When I found SR I was immediately comforted by the caring support I received. Everyone understood what I was going through. Knowing I was no longer alone really helped with the anxiety & fear I was feeling.
I'm so glad you see what needs to be done & are taking action. You'll never regret taking this step.
I knew in my 30's that I was too dependent on alcohol, but I chose to try & manage it myself. As a result, years later I was drinking every day - with a ruined life. When I found SR I was immediately comforted by the caring support I received. Everyone understood what I was going through. Knowing I was no longer alone really helped with the anxiety & fear I was feeling.
I'm so glad you see what needs to be done & are taking action. You'll never regret taking this step.
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