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Silly question, and don’t want to offend...but curious

Old 05-24-2018, 06:30 AM
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Silly question, and don’t want to offend...but curious

Why is it some people have stronger cravings and withdrawal symptoms while other alcoholics can go a few days without much problem? Is it a mental aspect or more of a physical thing, or both? I’m trying to understand my addiction to alcohol and do some major soul searching trying to figure out how I got this way. Just wondering why some alcoholics seem to have “easier” first few days. I know it’s different for everyone, but some alcoholics seem to struggle going one day while others can manage a few days a week with few issues. Is one alcoholic more addicted than the other? I’m not trying to find a reason to relapse, don’t want to start over again after 6 sober days, but was curious.
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Old 05-24-2018, 06:34 AM
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I think there are several factors which are individual to each person. One of the main factors is the amount of alcohol and duration of drinking. Then after each relapse, there is the effect of kindling, which makes those withdrawals worse each time. Not discounted are the underlying reasons each of us drink and our ability to cope with them without alcohol.

6 days of sobriety is wonderful! Keep it going! .
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Old 05-24-2018, 06:34 AM
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I guess if you accept that we are all unique, then our responses to alcohol and withdrawal will also be unique. We drink in different ways, binging, daily, all day every day. And we are all biologically slightly different and have different pasts etc.

It doesn't make any difference though, does it?

I mean, I knew I needed to quit. I took it a day at a time. I went to a lot of AA meetings and came here and no ones' story is exactly like mine - and more is revealed to me every day.

Stay off the ledge and you won't fall to your death.
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Old 05-24-2018, 06:46 AM
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I had no withdrawals, I was a weekend warrior. I would binge and blackout almost every weekend. The day I stopped, I was hung over, it sucked, but I will never have to feel that way again, at least for today I know I won't!
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Old 05-24-2018, 07:02 AM
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I drank till I had to stop, then stopped till I had to drink. I was always very ill after a bender. I used to envy those alcoholics who could stay topped up without losing control like I did.

Taking it past initial withdrawals, there does seem to be a period of grace, or window of opportunity for newly sober alcoholics to begin making the changes necessary for permanent recovery. That seems to be different for everyone. For me I had about 20 days to get busy before the obsession would return. Others get just a few days and some get years.

The one thing that is the same is that no one knows how long they have. Best not to waste time though.
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Old 05-24-2018, 07:26 AM
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Hi Amby,

I drank for 30 years, and quit many times during my lifetime. I am almost 4 months sober today. I can honestly say for me, the longer I'm away from booze...the less I think about it...want it....crave it....ect....

I don't intend to put myself in any situations that might tempt me.....
No parties
No dating
No bars
for as long as it takes......maybe forever.

My sobriety means more to me than any of the 3 things I have listed.
You can do this too! One day at a time, one foot in front of the other.



WF
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Old 05-24-2018, 07:30 AM
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Great question!

Hey there,I think the degree of persistence and severity of cravings is different for everyone. I know for myself that if I was Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired those feelings would trigger a craving. In a nutshell it depends on the experiences that you have. I drank during the 5:30-7:00pm time period each day for years so once I got sober it wasn’t surprising to me that I would crave alcohol during that time.
As far as withdrawals I’ve heard that withdrawals get worse and worse the more you relapse. Things get worse never better. That may be a good motivation to stay sober! : )
My last withdrawal in Feb 2017 last for weeks. I had severe insomnia and anxiety for weeks. I keep that fresh in my mind if I ever decide that picking up a drink is a good idea. Hope I was helpful!
Garrison
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Old 05-24-2018, 07:30 AM
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Is one alcoholic more addicted than the other?
there are stages to alcoholism. some stop sooner than others but it seems that doesnt change the obsession level.

i drank for 23 years. when i stiopped i had no problem with the obessesion for a bit becuas ei was extremely misreable and in quite a mental fog.
once the mental fog and misery started to lift(about a month in) the obsession started hitting pretty strong.
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Old 05-24-2018, 07:44 AM
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I'm not sure it really matters much Amby. I desperately searched for a reason as to "'why" i am the way I am, but in the end it it really doesn't matter. I simply AM an a alcoholic, and comparing myself to others did not help solve my problem.

The symptoms you experience as an active drinking alcoholic can get progressively worse over time too. I personally had pretty much no withdrawal symptoms at all if I tried to quit earlier on in my life. Fast forward to the last time I quit and I ended up in the ER with dangerously high BP and heart palpitations.

Another thing to keep your eye on is that the "why" quest can also be your AV/addiction trying to convince you that you can solve "why" and somehow return to normal drinking. I fell for that one many times too unfortunately.
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Old 05-24-2018, 07:53 AM
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Exactly what Scott said.
I'm glad you're here, AmbyMarie.
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Old 05-24-2018, 07:54 AM
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Alcoholism affects people in many different shapes and forms and for many different reasons. Pain is relative.

For example, I have never been someone who wakes up in the morning and starts drinking. I kept my drinking to the evenings. To some it would appear as if my drinking isn't "that bad".

Yet here I am attempting to quit for god knows what time. And it's tough. This time around I am finding it much easier than previously, but that doesn't mean I'm free from the battles of alcoholism.

If it were that easy I wouldn't be an alcoholic.
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Old 05-24-2018, 08:19 AM
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From Scott: Another thing to keep your eye on is that the "why" quest can also be your AV/addiction trying to convince you that you can solve "why" and somehow return to normal drinking. I fell for that one many times too unfortunately.

Very true and SO important!
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Old 05-24-2018, 09:33 AM
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Exactly what Scott then Hevyn said. My focus on the whys and wherefores kept me drinking a very long time - only once the alcohol was gone could I start addressing underlying "whys"...keep going to day 7 and beyond! Time really does take time to create a new life for ourselves.
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Old 05-24-2018, 01:08 PM
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I wonder why I have this problem and my sister doesn't. I wonder why I feel I have to get my due share and I can't drink normally. I can't believe its all genetics but I don't know if I will ever find the answer.
Thank you for your post. It helps me when everyone response to get more clarity and know I've got this.
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Old 05-24-2018, 01:41 PM
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As pointed above, it depends on how much and how long you drank and what you were drinking. And how your general health is and if you took vitamins or were able to eat. I hate beer but guys like it. Hard liquor invariably put me to ER and ultimately to jail. In any case all of it really self poisoning your body. Do seek medical help if it gets bad. At least have someone be there. I had horrible hallucinations long after detox. But who wants night sweats, nausea, shakes, guilt and shame? Being unfocused and antsy, insomnia? Looking like something that the cat dragged in? No. Ride the wave but I was not able to do this alone. Hence this board because it is a proven fact that there is someone here 24/7 and if it gets really bad seek medical help. They have seen it all. Only once did I got treated like a leper. There was a tall blonde nurse and she said "is this one for us? She's a drunk". The other nurses and doctors held my hand. I let it slide. Whatever you need to do fight the good fight and if it gets bad see a doctor, councilor or AA. Hugs and much luck to you, stay here.
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