time2shineagain

I had a GP appointment today to get a painful lump in my breast checked out. I'm having further testing done next week. I'm pretty young (34) and I know rationally that it is most likely nothing, or benign, BUT that doesn't stop the thoughts of 'escaping' in a bottle of wine go away. Would booze help this situation? No. But gosh it's tempting. I don't want to throw away my hard-earned 54 days. So posting here first. And keeping busy.

Thank you SR.

emme99

Hi time2shineagain, great job on 54 days ! You are right, wine won’t help. I know it’s easier said than done, but worrying won’t help either. Good job posting and keeping busy, I’m sending positive thoughts your way.

Dee74

Hi Time2shine

Drinking won't stop you worrying...and you know how it goes...you'll have to drink more and more (in volume and frequency) to try and satisfy your reawakened taste for alcohol.

I'm sorry this must be a very uncertain time for you but the way through it is by staying sober.

I hope you get the best possible news

D

Caralara144

Don't drink hunni
It won't make you feel any better
Stay focused...
All will be good x

time2shineagain

Thank you lovely people. Breast cancer has always scared me as my grandmother had it. Getting to bed sober tonight is the goal. I have no doubt I'll feel more positive tomorrow. About to indulge in nachos then ice-cream.

Rar

HI TImetoshine........>I really understand your health scares. I speak from experience when I say that alcohol isn't going to cure them. I relapsed over my own health scares. The health problems are still here and I'm still scared. The only thing changed is that I gave up my 112 days of sobriety.

Please stay close. I"m here for you. I wish I could take the fear away.

wynwrights

Morning timetoshine. I’m keeping it all crossed for you that the news is good. Alcohol, as you say yourself, is not going to help you cope in any meaningful way and it’s certainly not going to help your anxiety with what you’ve got going on. Thanks for the reminder that a really big part of recovering from alcohol is learning to deal with things we find difficult, rather than numbing or ignoring them; that’s where that resolve not to drink comes in as it allows us to develop our coping muscles!

All my best to you; let us know how you go.

entropy1964

I've had cancer twice. Both detected early, both treatable...although one reared up last november but again, early detection. It's really hard but drinking over it is the ultimate in irrational. Alcohol is a carcinogen and actually causes cancer, including breast. So NOT drinking is the best choice you can make.

When I'm facing the unknown I force myself to deal with only the facts. Stay in that fact until further fact finding changes the situation. I try not to let my mind stray out into the results that aren't yet known. Or catastrophize a 'worst case' scenario that isn't at all reality. I cannot afford to do that, even though my addiction loves it when I do because then I can play the victim and rationalize that I deserve a drink. Which is insane.

Hang in there. Don't worry.

Laura3

It's probably benign. I had lumps appearing in the lymph nodes and breasts. I was convinced I was dying but they were all benign in the end

time2shineagain

Thank you so much...Emme, D, Cara, Rar, WW, Frick and Laura...I appreciate all the kind words and personal experience. Oh Rar, I know you're fighting your own battles at the moment so thank you so much for the support.

Got to bed sober last night. I woke up this morning feeling much more positive. It's so unlikely to be anything sinister. I was just a bit emotional after the appointment yesterday and my thoughts kept wandering to the fact that my grandmother had breast cancer. Fact is, she was about 50 when she had it, so a fair bit older than I am.

I won't drink over this. Thank you again

AnvilheadII

time2shine, beautiful pup in your avatar by the way. i'm not sure you realize what a significant step you made in your recovery in the last 24 hours. you received some startling, upsetting news, which would throw anyone off their game.......and the drinker's Go To response is....to drink.

and you did NOT. you made a different choice. you broke the chain. that is not to say there won't be other moments, but you are on your way.

wishing you the best.

time2shineagain

Thanks Anvil! Drinking alcohol isn't a very good coping method...I know this logically. So breaking the cycle of using booze as medicine IS a big step for me (and other alcoholics). I'm feeling motivated by the fact that it's most likely nothing sinister and I'd be pretty upset with myself if I have to start again over nothing. Today brings a much better mood and more positive outlook. I'll definitely update after the scan +/- biopsy

wynwrights

Yeah, absolutely! Hope you’re taking credit where credit is due, time2shine.

Caralara144

Time to shine
I had a painful lump 10 years ago
Worried the head of myself went and had the breast screening turned out it was hormonal ...Nothing to worry about but to this day it's still very painful
Have you an appointment??
Sending you loads of hugs 💜💚💛

time2shineagain

Thanks Cara ❤
My ultrasound is booked for Thursday morning (Australian time).

Rar

Will be thinking of you Timetoshineagain. Keep us posted.

Stubbs16

Best wishes for your scan.
I freak out too over my health, which is just another excellent reason to quit the drinking.

time2shineagain

Happy to report that my ultrasound went well and I didn't turn to the bottle despite my anxiety the last few days. Day 60.

Thank you SR!!

Caralara144

BRILLIANT news hunni
Here with you
Hugs xxx
Cara

time2shineagain

Thanks, Cara!