Hevyn

Stewy, You sounded so much better just a few days ago. Like you were relieved to be climbing out of the hole. You can get back there. This time stay with it, & give yourself a fighting chance to live again.

thomas11

Stew, as an alcoholic and addict I won't turn my back on you. I will support your efforts. That being said, you are not doing yourself any favors and quite frankly, since you are a parent, I think you are being soft and not a good parent. My wife and I do not have kids, we have pets (dogs specifically) and our golden cut his head yesterday and we are so focused on his health, drinking does not even come into play. But that's addiction bro, and you have it bad.

3trees

i hope that when you read all of these posts again, you realize that you are not alone. you can start over, and we will support you.

ScottFromWI

Yet you come here drunk day after day and share your issues with us but do nothing about it. And we listen.

jt1234

Agree with Scott. We are here to listen and provide moral support/ideas. It’s up to you, and only you to change

You have a lot of people who have gone through similar issues. Including myself. I came home from 6 months in Afghanistan to find out my wife had been cheating when I was gone. I drank to numb the pain. I was devastated Once I realized drinking was only making it worse everything got better. I realized I wasn’t in love with her anymore either. I realized facing these issues was easier sober. I realized my daughter was all that mattered.

Make the move man. Stop drinking.

Verdantia

Stewy, I feel very sad for you. I understand the depths to which alcohol can take us. It is a prison of horror and torture and hopelessness, but you have the key in your possession. Stop drinking and face your life with clarity and dignity.
Since you are a parent, think of your child. My father was a horrifying alcoholic who made our family life a living hell. I resented and hated him and then grew up to be a drunk, too, the thing I most hated. Dad became sober and we reconciled at the end of his life, but I wasted too much time feeling helplessness, anger and pain. I don't want your child to feel that way about you. Please get help; I know you are against rehab but I needed it and a lot of help from others to get and stay sober. I am rooting for you so hard.

DontRemember

This is also something I'm working at repairing with my 22yr old daughter,stew.. I've drank pretty much her whole life and there's 100% resentment still there..but...she knows I'm trying to make my amends day by day. I wasn't a raging drunk,but I have been an *******. At a bit over a year sober and present in her life, she's starting to see that I'm serious about my sobriety. She drinks and that's whatever..I have warned her "don't let it get ya!",but that's her life to live..I'm actually at a loss for what direction to 'point' you in because it seems like you aren't ready to give up the drink/self pity...I do wish you well,my friend.

SoberLeigh

Stewy, hope to hear from you.

Delilah1

Stewy,

Drinking is preventing you from finding happiness in all aspects of your life. I really hope you decide to actually give sobriety a chance. You know what you need to do to stay sober, now you need to commit to doing it.

Hevyn

Hoping you're ready to give it another go, Stewy. We know you can rise above this bad time in your life & have a new beginning.

Stew1984

I don’t feel like I’m rising above anything at the minute. I made one mistake, drinking beer. It’s not a complicated thing

Absolutely bombarding me and saying I need rehab and aa and smart recovery is not working this time.

I understand that I have a problem, I’m not burying my head in the sand.

It is all down to me and my mindset. Quitting the band I play in is detrimental to me, taking time out from my routine at work is detrimental to me.

I don’t really feel like it’s worth me posting here anymore. I’m having a difficult time, but I truly believe that going to aa or smart is not going to help me. I’ve read some AVRT stuff, maybe it’s that will help me.

I get it, you guys reply with the absolute best advice you can give, and based on your experiences. I know I’m hard work but honestly, once I’ve cracked this, it will be forever. I’m getting close, just don’t lose faith in me

Dee74

its never worked Stewy.

Your addiction has you convinced that you can beat this by yourself, changing very little.

It tells you're 'nearly there', but the reality is much of the last two years have been the same.

It loves you in that mindset, Stewy cos the only thing you show any real enthusiasm for right now, the only thing you take any real action on, is more drinking.

D

Anna

Stewy, I always have faith in you.

But, something needs to change. I understand quitting your band would be detrimental, as would taking time off work. But drinking alcohol is also very detrimental.

ScottFromWI

Read back through this and you'll see that this is just the same 'ol story Stew. You don't think you should post here anymore. You think you can do this yourself. You are getting close/quitting tomorrow/soon. You won't do/don't need rehab. You "read some stuff". You think you have it "figured out"

It's all the same thing you've been saying for months and months - and that's all it is - talk. Talk won't get you sober. I've probably written this same reply to you at least a dozen times and I'll probably write it another dozen if you keep on the same track you are today.

And yes - it's frustrating as hell because you are throwing away your life when you have so much to live for and so many things around you to live for. You have parents that have taken you in despite your drinking. You have a daughter that doesn't have a dad because you refuse to take any action. You are being colossally selfish with your addiction - and that's pretty much exactly what it wants - your attention all to itself. And that's what it's got. Many of us were there at one point - but there is a way out. You need to choose it or face the consequences.

AnvilheadII

stew, two days ago you posted here:

I’m going to end up dead at this rate.

now today you say hey its just beer, no big deal.

you continue to REFUSE any and all suggestions. you have an excuse for everything. you won't put forth energy into recovery but hell no you won't let go of THE BAND. you want what you want without actually DOING anything. you post here drunk saying life is over and then have the audacity to come back and tell the caring supportive folks here to hang it.

Carlotta

OK, so you posted about all the stuff you don't want...cool
Now stop for a minute and ask yourself (and answer yourself honestly):

What do you truly want?

Then put it in writing and start taking action to achieve whatever it is keeping in mind that sometimes in life, you cannot have your cake and eat it too.

Flower2327

I'm rooting for you, stew. Lots of good advice here.

turniptheheat

Hope this inspires you today Stewy to take some action.

DontRemember

I took around 6 months off from 'life' for he most part when I got serious. I understand not everyone can do that with jobs,kids,ect..BUT..I would wreck all of that eventually anyway with continued drinking,sooooo..yeah..

Delilah1

Stewy,

There is lots of good advice here, and there are lots of great people offering support. We will all be here when you are ready. I hope that day is soon.