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My Journey - Being Honest

Old 04-02-2018, 01:03 PM
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My Journey - Being Honest

Had a drink after 3.5 weeks drink free. My partner Janet won at bingo and to share her joy I had about a third of a bottle of gin on each night - sat and sun. No ill effects apparent thank god and no guilt. I didnt feel under the influence - no misbehaving, no rows, full memory.
Now Im not complacent and now Im going on another alcohol drought ,as this time , from midnight I go on a low carb diet and it wouldnt compliment this. Not just that of course. The MAIN reason I started abstinence or my " new way" was to get the benefit bag that giving up the sauce allows us. I will continue to strive to achieve to enjoy it's contents.
I do not wish to go back to my old ways and indeed , I didnt go into any physical or mental place that has led to me needing or craving more.
So - I took a chance - and survived unscathed. If I dont write these things down and share then I wouldnt feel truthful to this community.
I hope all who read are in fine shape and are remaining positive and healthy.
Regards
Dave 🤠
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Old 04-02-2018, 01:09 PM
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So, you relapsed after 3 1/2 weeks of abstinence. Well, I'm glad you're back and do you plan on stopping drinking completely? If so, you will find lots of support here.
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Old 04-02-2018, 01:11 PM
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Originally Posted by daveglass1 View Post
So - I took a chance - and survived unscathed.
Those can be the scariest relapses...easy to want to take another chance.

Hope you can put down the drinking for good.
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Old 04-02-2018, 01:34 PM
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Many here can tell you a familiar story of relapsing lightly at first and within no time being back to drinking the same or more, and plenty scathed.

I also can’t help but observe how easy it is to find every excuse under the sun to “have to” have a drink. For some, weddings = drinking. Others, winning at bingo .. for others, losing at bingo. Having a good day, having a bad day. Celebrating.. mourning. Getting the job, losing the job.

If you want to stop drinking, I encourage you to discard the false idea that ANY circumstance permits or requires alcohol.
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Old 04-02-2018, 01:40 PM
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Thanks Anna and Carl

The long term prognosis is good. The mental cravings are not their and I have put my sober time to good use - creating new living frameworks and targets. A slip yes but relative to where Ive been Im well ahead of my own game. Abstinence remains my goal - I dont have mental hurdles currently, just a load of stuff that a sober world has already allowed me to set out on the table. For example I have today been able to pay for my garden to be cleared ahead of summer - Ive booked and set up monthly installments for 2 weeks in the sun in October. Ive also begun a committment to a long term savings plan ( my long term will now be extended somewhat).
Ive read a lot , my mind is sharper and my eyes look like they are from earth.
If these things can happen in the short term then I look forward to the future.
Thank you for your early replies .
Regards
Dave 🤠
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Old 04-02-2018, 03:02 PM
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Thank you Lily

I appreciate your contact and views.
I do not take any of my choices lightly and I read all replies - sometimes sooner than others but always.
I wasnt expecting endorsement of this event. This train has forward momentum and as I continue to strive for sobrietal perfection I will always be honest to the membership - if only to show this human racing away from previous despair.
Regards
Dave 🤠
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Old 04-02-2018, 03:41 PM
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Hi Dave not to pile on but I think you're underplaying this by quite a bit and that makes me think you're being played by your addiction a little.

Maybe this link will help explain to you why I think that.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...get-drunk.html ('at least I didn't get drunk...')

The too long summary is

Alcohol and I have a disastrous relationship. My drinking caused me immense pain and suffering, and it damn near destroyed me and all I loved....

if I drink - even one or two glasses - it's anything but a triumph.
D
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Old 04-02-2018, 04:59 PM
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Warning Heard Dee - Thank You

If Im underplaying then its not consciously. But then there lies the hidden tormentor , the sub - conscious.
Im a competitor and if it wants to play games along the way Ill take it on.
I dont want or propose to be like everyone or anyone else - nobody would ask that of course. Ive always enjoyed being an individual within the team and just as I can empathise with everyone who has had their lives ruined by this drug - and appreciate their views and tolerance - I must forge my own furrow as we all do in the end.
I remain hopeful of my outcome and thank you much for your experienced input on an ongoing basis.
Its why I came
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Dave 🤠
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Old 04-02-2018, 05:24 PM
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I think many of us are outliers. rebels and individualists Dave - thats not to say we don't share a common problem.

just food for thought, man.
D
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Old 04-02-2018, 05:56 PM
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Here is what my alcoholic mind does with such experiences.

As a watcher - You got away with it, maybe I can too. People are always telling me about the fatal first drink yet there you stand unscathed. Maybe they are exagerating.

As a relapser: Wow, how did that happen? Glad not much harm came from it. Back on the road now. Then, after a few days or weeks, "it's interesting that I didn't lose control. Maybe I am not alcoholic after all. Perhaps the break from drinking was all that was needed to set me right again." Then perhaps later still, the thought comes that a drink would be nice. I have been sober a long time without any problem, and last time seemed to work out ok....

You get where this is going. The big problem for me was I never saw the first drink coming. Alcoholism can be very subtle. In hind sight I could see all sorts of things, but I never could recognise the danger signs in advance.
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Old 04-02-2018, 06:05 PM
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Continued ;)

Agreed - I have a problem Dee.
And this is all helping me through.
Most days I get to check in here and write something or take a read at the experiences of others.
I appreciate the power of the group union.
You and the moderator team are a great help.
The road will be long and worth it.
Regards
Dave 🤠
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Old 04-02-2018, 06:20 PM
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Hey Gottalife

I wrote a lengthy reply but the site sort of reloaded itself and it disappeared.
In a long winded way - I said that I hear you and many thanks for taking your time to reply.
Regards
Dave 🤠
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Old 04-02-2018, 06:25 PM
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I'm glad you wanted to talk about what happened, Dave.
It's all been said - I have nothing new to add. Just be careful with you precious life. We care about you.
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Old 04-02-2018, 06:30 PM
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Hi Hevyn

I went off course - now back on.
No cravings - no shakes - no lack of clarity , although sometimes upon re-reading my ramblings I can see that that might not be obvious to others. Imagine me a month ago!
Thank you for taking time out to respond. All views count.
Regards
Dave 🤠
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