One month sober challange - I think I´m an alcoholic
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Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 1
One month sober challange - I think I´m an alcoholic
23 year old male here. I´ve always had a thirst for alcohol, since the first time I tried it. Usually the drunkest during gatherins, have been that way since I turned legal age.
I did not think I was an alcoholic, it never crossed my mind really, up until last week when I completed a One Month Sober Challange with my roomies. I stayed sober for a month....BUT. I had cravings for alcohol during the time I used to drink....friday-saturday. Its a sign of alcoholism right? Few times I was pretty close to opening a bottle, but I did not want to loose the bet.
And I can´t usually control my drinking, I drink to get drunk, not for the taste. not to get that 1 hour buzz from just one beer, I mean, I get drunk.
After the challange ended I got very-very drunk. It was like some kind of reward for me....finally, I can get blasterd!....I dont think normal people without a drinking problem look forward to get wasted....do they?
Am I an alcoholic?
sorry for typos
I did not think I was an alcoholic, it never crossed my mind really, up until last week when I completed a One Month Sober Challange with my roomies. I stayed sober for a month....BUT. I had cravings for alcohol during the time I used to drink....friday-saturday. Its a sign of alcoholism right? Few times I was pretty close to opening a bottle, but I did not want to loose the bet.
And I can´t usually control my drinking, I drink to get drunk, not for the taste. not to get that 1 hour buzz from just one beer, I mean, I get drunk.
After the challange ended I got very-very drunk. It was like some kind of reward for me....finally, I can get blasterd!....I dont think normal people without a drinking problem look forward to get wasted....do they?
Am I an alcoholic?
sorry for typos
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 1,065
Only you can tell if you are an alcoholic.
Normal people can take or leave booze...
I used to do one month sober challenges a couple times a year, it was the in between times I realized I had an issue. So I did one and made it a lifestyle
That was 156 days ago, I still get twinges some Fridays, or when I do something I used to drink while doing, like the first spring bbq - the point is, I know I am an alcoholic, I know I have a problem with booze, I too used it as a reward and bought into it's promises of easier sleep, more fun. They are all lies, I sleep amazing, down and out and awake and bright, I aim for 6-7 hours, but am Ok with 4 and can't go more than 8, there is no reward in feeling like crap the next day, or having to use the porcelain phone in the middle of the night and I have way more fun sober and remember it! It cannot be a factor in my life anymore. I wish I had quit younger, but I just wasn't ready.
Normal people can take or leave booze...
I used to do one month sober challenges a couple times a year, it was the in between times I realized I had an issue. So I did one and made it a lifestyle
That was 156 days ago, I still get twinges some Fridays, or when I do something I used to drink while doing, like the first spring bbq - the point is, I know I am an alcoholic, I know I have a problem with booze, I too used it as a reward and bought into it's promises of easier sleep, more fun. They are all lies, I sleep amazing, down and out and awake and bright, I aim for 6-7 hours, but am Ok with 4 and can't go more than 8, there is no reward in feeling like crap the next day, or having to use the porcelain phone in the middle of the night and I have way more fun sober and remember it! It cannot be a factor in my life anymore. I wish I had quit younger, but I just wasn't ready.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NYC/NJ
Posts: 431
Originally Posted by Godin 
23 year old male here. I´ve always had a thirst for alcohol, since the first time I tried it. Usually the drunkest during gatherins, have been that way since I turned legal age.
I did not think I was an alcoholic, it never crossed my mind really, up until last week when I completed a One Month Sober Challange with my roomies. I stayed sober for a month....BUT. I had cravings for alcohol during the time I used to drink....friday-saturday. Its a sign of alcoholism right? Few times I was pretty close to opening a bottle, but I did not want to loose the bet.
And I can´t usually control my drinking, I drink to get drunk, not for the taste. not to get that 1 hour buzz from just one beer, I mean, I get drunk.
After the challange ended I got very-very drunk. It was like some kind of reward for me....finally, I can get blasterd!....I dont think normal people without a drinking problem look forward to get wasted....do they?
Am I an alcoholic?
sorry for typos
I did not think I was an alcoholic, it never crossed my mind really, up until last week when I completed a One Month Sober Challange with my roomies. I stayed sober for a month....BUT. I had cravings for alcohol during the time I used to drink....friday-saturday. Its a sign of alcoholism right? Few times I was pretty close to opening a bottle, but I did not want to loose the bet.
And I can´t usually control my drinking, I drink to get drunk, not for the taste. not to get that 1 hour buzz from just one beer, I mean, I get drunk.
After the challange ended I got very-very drunk. It was like some kind of reward for me....finally, I can get blasterd!....I dont think normal people without a drinking problem look forward to get wasted....do they?
Am I an alcoholic?
sorry for typos
No Dogma Please
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: SoCal
Posts: 2,562
There's a good chance.
It's also possible that Stride is right and it's called being 23.
Do you want to chance it?
I got blasted a few times in college, and when I got drunk I got DRUNK. But most of us did.
I spent most of my 20s having drinks with dinner on weekends; I'd buy a bottle of wine and it would spoil.
Grad school in my early 30s was when I started binge drinking, which lead to daily drinking in my early 40s.
I'm a classic example of slow escalating, that ended up in medical detox and inpatient rehab in my mid 50s.
Do you want to go there?
BTW, life is better without booze.
It's also possible that Stride is right and it's called being 23.
Do you want to chance it?
I got blasted a few times in college, and when I got drunk I got DRUNK. But most of us did.
I spent most of my 20s having drinks with dinner on weekends; I'd buy a bottle of wine and it would spoil.
Grad school in my early 30s was when I started binge drinking, which lead to daily drinking in my early 40s.
I'm a classic example of slow escalating, that ended up in medical detox and inpatient rehab in my mid 50s.
Do you want to go there?
BTW, life is better without booze.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: PRINCETON, TX
Posts: 113
Well, of course we cannot sit here and declare anyone an alcoholic, or not an alcoholic. So, I will just share my early drinking experiences. When in college my buddies and I became frequent partiers. I loved the effect of drinking, and a lot of people drink because they like the effect. Ask someone who is drinking whiskey sours if they would continue to drink them if they were non-alcoholic, and most folks would say no, give me a coke, or tea, or water. My experience was once I discovered the effect, I wanted more and more. The first drink assured I would drink until I could no longer drink (the phenomenon of craving) and I had the obsession of the mind that led me to the first drink. I always fired for effect. Most of my drinking buddies after several months decided if they wanted to succeed in college that they had to quit drinking or moderate, and they did. I did not. That to me illustrates the difference. So, eventually, 20 years later after the hell I went thru, I surrendered. I declared myself alcoholic in need of help. If folks can moderate or quit without a problem, they may not be of the alcoholic described in the literature. For you, I have no advice, only what I went thru. I have my opinion, but that is not important. Only you can prevent forest fires, right?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 154
It's possible that you conditioned yourself a little bit to drink more on the weekends. That's when most people drink. It would be normal to have cravings then.
Drinking to get drunk, not being able to control your drinking...the very fact that you came to this forum, those are all signs to take a closer look at your drinking habits and at least approach something a little healthier. Whether or not full sobriety is your path is ultimately up to you.
Drinking to get drunk, not being able to control your drinking...the very fact that you came to this forum, those are all signs to take a closer look at your drinking habits and at least approach something a little healthier. Whether or not full sobriety is your path is ultimately up to you.
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
Suffering from alcoholism had two key elements, what happened to me when I drank, and what happened when I stopped.
When I drank, it was usually to get right with the world, just relax and have a good time. I nearly always overshot the mark and lost control. Getting legless and all the consequences that went with it, was usually the furthest thing from my mind when I took that drink. When things started to get bad and I wanted to stop, I found I could not. Not for month, a week or even a day. That first drink went down often without conscious thought and the cycle would repeat.
When I did manage to white knuckle a few days sober, my life got worse. Trouble was booze was not my problem, it was my solution. Without it I had trouble functioning in the world. I became progressively more unhappy until I could again experience the sense of ease and comfort that came with a few drinks. As my drinking got worse, that sense of ease became fleeting, and I would overshoot the mark with even more serious consequences.
If I was just a problem drinker, then stopping drinking would fix all the problems. A month off with a few minor cravings doesn't sound bad to me. But that wasn't my experience. Any sober time was miserable and unhappy. Seems I couldn't win either sober or drunk.
When I drank, it was usually to get right with the world, just relax and have a good time. I nearly always overshot the mark and lost control. Getting legless and all the consequences that went with it, was usually the furthest thing from my mind when I took that drink. When things started to get bad and I wanted to stop, I found I could not. Not for month, a week or even a day. That first drink went down often without conscious thought and the cycle would repeat.
When I did manage to white knuckle a few days sober, my life got worse. Trouble was booze was not my problem, it was my solution. Without it I had trouble functioning in the world. I became progressively more unhappy until I could again experience the sense of ease and comfort that came with a few drinks. As my drinking got worse, that sense of ease became fleeting, and I would overshoot the mark with even more serious consequences.
If I was just a problem drinker, then stopping drinking would fix all the problems. A month off with a few minor cravings doesn't sound bad to me. But that wasn't my experience. Any sober time was miserable and unhappy. Seems I couldn't win either sober or drunk.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 154
Originally Posted by Gottalife
Suffering from alcoholism had two key elements, what happened to me when I drank, and what happened when I stopped.
When I drank, it was usually to get right with the world, just relax and have a good time. I nearly always overshot the mark and lost control. Getting legless and all the consequences that went with it, was usually the furthest thing from my mind when I took that drink. When things started to get bad and I wanted to stop, I found I could not. Not for month, a week or even a day. That first drink went down often without conscious thought and the cycle would repeat.
When I did manage to white knuckle a few days sober, my life got worse. Trouble was booze was not my problem, it was my solution. Without it I had trouble functioning in the world. I became progressively more unhappy until I could again experience the sense of ease and comfort that came with a few drinks. As my drinking got worse, that sense of ease became fleeting, and I would overshoot the mark with even more serious consequences.
If I was just a problem drinker, then stopping drinking would fix all the problems. A month off with a few minor cravings doesn't sound bad to me. But that wasn't my experience. Any sober time was miserable and unhappy. Seems I couldn't win either sober or drunk.
When I drank, it was usually to get right with the world, just relax and have a good time. I nearly always overshot the mark and lost control. Getting legless and all the consequences that went with it, was usually the furthest thing from my mind when I took that drink. When things started to get bad and I wanted to stop, I found I could not. Not for month, a week or even a day. That first drink went down often without conscious thought and the cycle would repeat.
When I did manage to white knuckle a few days sober, my life got worse. Trouble was booze was not my problem, it was my solution. Without it I had trouble functioning in the world. I became progressively more unhappy until I could again experience the sense of ease and comfort that came with a few drinks. As my drinking got worse, that sense of ease became fleeting, and I would overshoot the mark with even more serious consequences.
If I was just a problem drinker, then stopping drinking would fix all the problems. A month off with a few minor cravings doesn't sound bad to me. But that wasn't my experience. Any sober time was miserable and unhappy. Seems I couldn't win either sober or drunk.
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
Originally Posted by orderfororder
This sounds like me. I take it that it was working a program that has helped you?
Working the AA program of recovery, the whole package of meetings sponsor and steps completely changed my life. Three months (well into step 9) in I realised I was free of the obsession an had been for most of that three months. From that point on my life without alcohol got better and better.. Never had any need to go back drinking since.
Orderfororder, I hope you can find what I did. Frankly, for me life without either alcohol or recovery was not worth living.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: St.Petersburg, FL.
Posts: 1,077
Hi there, Godin. If you think you have a problem with booze you most likely do. Only you can decide if you're an alcoholic. I will say that alcohol is a poison and you and everyone else is far better without it. I hope you decide you quit while you are young and ahead of the game. It's not worth it.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 154
Day 7, good milestone. Body is almost back to normal. Hopefully no sleep issues tonight.
I definitely had a lot of urges throughout the day, but fought them off and made sure to log in here and read threads. Crazy that I'm only just recovering my physical wellbeing and my mind still considers booze a possibility. A dumb addiction.
Considering a step program of some sort. Or therapy. I need something extra to get my mind right so that I can be the best version of myself.
Hopefully you guys are powering on!
I definitely had a lot of urges throughout the day, but fought them off and made sure to log in here and read threads. Crazy that I'm only just recovering my physical wellbeing and my mind still considers booze a possibility. A dumb addiction.
Considering a step program of some sort. Or therapy. I need something extra to get my mind right so that I can be the best version of myself.
Hopefully you guys are powering on!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 366
Godin,
Honestly I see some red flags in your post. Maybe I'm just reading too much of my own stuff into what you wrote. I remember in college getting drunk, too drunk, too often. Like others have said, it seems like most college kids do (probably even more back when I was in school).
But I also remember having a different relationship with alcohol than most of my friends (sorority sisters) did. Like you said, we'd make a promise to do a "sober month", or a "cleanse" or something like that, and I would just white knuckle it. I wasn't addicted to alcohol. Not physically. I didn't the shakes or withdrawal or anything. But it was an obsession of sorts.
During these dry periods my friends would go on with their lives. They would occasionally remember that they weren't suppose to drink. (Like, "OMG, I almost ordered a glass of wine with dinner. Oops. Giggle"). Not me though. I thought about it all the time.
I actually didn't drink for a long period after college. I had kids young and was too poor to consider buying alcohol.
Still as soon as the opportunity came again, I was right back to obsessing about alcohol.
Sometimes it's not how much you drink. It's about how you think about alcohol.
For what it's worth.
Honestly I see some red flags in your post. Maybe I'm just reading too much of my own stuff into what you wrote. I remember in college getting drunk, too drunk, too often. Like others have said, it seems like most college kids do (probably even more back when I was in school).
But I also remember having a different relationship with alcohol than most of my friends (sorority sisters) did. Like you said, we'd make a promise to do a "sober month", or a "cleanse" or something like that, and I would just white knuckle it. I wasn't addicted to alcohol. Not physically. I didn't the shakes or withdrawal or anything. But it was an obsession of sorts.
During these dry periods my friends would go on with their lives. They would occasionally remember that they weren't suppose to drink. (Like, "OMG, I almost ordered a glass of wine with dinner. Oops. Giggle"). Not me though. I thought about it all the time.
I actually didn't drink for a long period after college. I had kids young and was too poor to consider buying alcohol.
Still as soon as the opportunity came again, I was right back to obsessing about alcohol.
Sometimes it's not how much you drink. It's about how you think about alcohol.
For what it's worth.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 154
Originally Posted by orderfororder
Day 7, good milestone. Body is almost back to normal. Hopefully no sleep issues tonight.
I definitely had a lot of urges throughout the day, but fought them off and made sure to log in here and read threads. Crazy that I'm only just recovering my physical wellbeing and my mind still considers booze a possibility. A dumb addiction.
Considering a step program of some sort. Or therapy. I need something extra to get my mind right so that I can be the best version of myself.
Hopefully you guys are powering on!
I definitely had a lot of urges throughout the day, but fought them off and made sure to log in here and read threads. Crazy that I'm only just recovering my physical wellbeing and my mind still considers booze a possibility. A dumb addiction.
Considering a step program of some sort. Or therapy. I need something extra to get my mind right so that I can be the best version of myself.
Hopefully you guys are powering on!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,429
Hi and welcome Godin
Like others have said, only you can decide.
That being said there's a lot of red flags in your post - craving alcohol, not being able to stop when you start, getting wasted.
There would have been a time I'd have said it's just 23, but I have a neice that age now and a nephew a couple of years younger and they don't drink like this, and neither do any of her friemnds...so I think it's something to definitely think about?
D
Like others have said, only you can decide.
That being said there's a lot of red flags in your post - craving alcohol, not being able to stop when you start, getting wasted.
There would have been a time I'd have said it's just 23, but I have a neice that age now and a nephew a couple of years younger and they don't drink like this, and neither do any of her friemnds...so I think it's something to definitely think about?
D
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: PRINCETON, TX
Posts: 113
Originally Posted by milly4me
Godin,
Honestly I see some red flags in your post. Maybe I'm just reading too much of my own stuff into what you wrote. I remember in college getting drunk, too drunk, too often. Like others have said, it seems like most college kids do (probably even more back when I was in school).
But I also remember having a different relationship with alcohol than most of my friends (sorority sisters) did. Like you said, we'd make a promise to do a "sober month", or a "cleanse" or something like that, and I would just white knuckle it. I wasn't addicted to alcohol. Not physically. I didn't the shakes or withdrawal or anything. But it was an obsession of sorts.
During these dry periods my friends would go on with their lives. They would occasionally remember that they weren't suppose to drink. (Like, "OMG, I almost ordered a glass of wine with dinner. Oops. Giggle"). Not me though. I thought about it all the time.
I actually didn't drink for a long period after college. I had kids young and was too poor to consider buying alcohol.
Still as soon as the opportunity came again, I was right back to obsessing about alcohol.
Sometimes it's not how much you drink. It's about how you think about alcohol.
For what it's worth.
Honestly I see some red flags in your post. Maybe I'm just reading too much of my own stuff into what you wrote. I remember in college getting drunk, too drunk, too often. Like others have said, it seems like most college kids do (probably even more back when I was in school).
But I also remember having a different relationship with alcohol than most of my friends (sorority sisters) did. Like you said, we'd make a promise to do a "sober month", or a "cleanse" or something like that, and I would just white knuckle it. I wasn't addicted to alcohol. Not physically. I didn't the shakes or withdrawal or anything. But it was an obsession of sorts.
During these dry periods my friends would go on with their lives. They would occasionally remember that they weren't suppose to drink. (Like, "OMG, I almost ordered a glass of wine with dinner. Oops. Giggle"). Not me though. I thought about it all the time.
I actually didn't drink for a long period after college. I had kids young and was too poor to consider buying alcohol.
Still as soon as the opportunity came again, I was right back to obsessing about alcohol.
Sometimes it's not how much you drink. It's about how you think about alcohol.
For what it's worth.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: PRINCETON, TX
Posts: 113
Regarding age, one of the miracles I had the privilege of witnessing was the sobriety at age 16 of a female alcoholic high school student who had been drinking for about 8 years! She was out of control. When I met her she was brand new. 11 years later she was still enjoying sobriety and living the principles and an active "old timer" in our AA group. Just a testimony for your consideration, and good luck
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 394
Everyone is different. At least you are recognizing it early, or at least exploring the idea that you don't think you're drinking normally. Drinking to get drunk is what I eventually evolved into (I was a social drinker, within the realms of normalcy, for years). That is how I knew I was an alcoholic. The lack of control started.
Also, you mentioning that though you did abstain for the month, once the timeline was over you got blitzed. Not a good sign.
As posters above have stated, only YOU can determine if you're an alcoholic. My advice is once you know for sure, quit while you are ahead and save yourself years of grief and misery. It doesn't end well.
Also, you mentioning that though you did abstain for the month, once the timeline was over you got blitzed. Not a good sign.
As posters above have stated, only YOU can determine if you're an alcoholic. My advice is once you know for sure, quit while you are ahead and save yourself years of grief and misery. It doesn't end well.
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