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Old 03-28-2018, 06:14 AM   #1 (permalink)
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16 days left.. time for change


Thank you for taking your time to read this. Iím getting out of the Marine Corps in 16 days and I am on my 3rd day of sobriety . Alcohol has been the most prominent cause of failure throughout my enlistment . From not showing up to a morning formations , to getting in rough physical altercations most of which I donít remember . Both my parents are recovering (have been for 15 years before I was born) and actually met in AA , LOL . So I knew this ran in my blood line , refused to think it controlled me until I started realizing that I donít throw up like others. . I have no idea how I got home , or my horrid attempt to make food . Now in the corps things got way worse be it I had a guaranteed paycheck, a barracks with one room mate so on and so forth. Iím fortunately in good shape , and I continue to be and honestly , if it wasnít for it I believe I would have severe physical issues . But thatís why Iím here now. These past two weeks Iíve been on ALL day bender . First week my girlfriend said she wonít speak to me until I get home cause I said I would stop. . So so many times before . Itís gotten to a point that EVERY weekend I would drink , black out each night, wind up on the floor when the beds right next to me and pee my self or pee myself in bed . Iím talking ALL the time, even overseas.. so embarrassing . I think Iíve coped with recovering on Mondayís and just putting in hard work physical training wise until Friday nights came along . Iím a good dude, and Iím sure everybody here is a great person, but itís absolutely time to throw in the towel for me. I canít go home and drink with the boys , I couldnít account for the amount of sleepless nights Iíve given my parents while home on leave or even before that , because they know what itís like, and Iím sure many of here know as well.. you never know where you will end up . Iíve just been fortunate to have very good friends outside and in the marine corps . And I look forward to making many more here

Last edited by Djnolten; 03-28-2018 at 06:16 AM. Reason: Title
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Old 03-28-2018, 06:30 AM   #2 (permalink)
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welcome to SR! It sounds like you will have a lot of support from your parents. They probably will be a great resource for you ...I hope you let them be.

It is a good decision to quit now while you are young and still healthy and there won't be anymore bad consequences. Have you tried AA?
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Old 03-28-2018, 11:12 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Scary that the military enables alcoholism like that, but completely understandable that any latent drinking problem comes out with the stress of service. AND the drinking culture that exists when off base and off duty. I've known several Navy and Marines who had serious issues. There are many at the gay bars in San Diego in the grips of some pretty serious addiction.

Just don't celebrate the end of your service with a trip to the bars with buddies, military or otherwise.

It may or may not be a good idea yet, and you may be busy dealing with the aftereffects of lots of alcohol, but getting sober and sharing your experience is key If and when it's appropriate and you're ready, telling your family and loved ones can be helpful in keeping you sober, as it becomes harder to hide it from people if they know. Believe it or not more people than not are supportive and proud, especially family and romantic partners.

You may find that this journey is a tough one. So is being a Marine. You've proven that you've got the strength and courage to do this. You got through training and either combat or the possibility that you would have to be in combat.

I've known Marines, and there's a certain bond in the Corp that's hard to replicate, and was tough when they finished their service and it started to dissolve. Finding others going through what you are going through might make it much easier. They'll get it. Other groups are pretty essential, AA or otherwise. Having a plan to get and remain sober is crucial, there's plenty of information about this on the site.

Congrats on your 3 days. If you can make it the start of the rest of your life you will look back on this moment, as difficult as it is now, with humility and pride.
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Old 03-28-2018, 11:48 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Congrats on your 3 days Djnolten and welcome to SR
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Old 03-28-2018, 12:07 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Welcome!

Congratulations on Day 3! I'm glad you have decided to stop drinking for good. It's probably a good idea to make a plan as to how you will work on your recovery when you get back home. And, I hope you will continue to read and post here where you will find lots of support.
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Old 03-28-2018, 11:42 PM   #6 (permalink)
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welcome to SR! It sounds like you will have a lot of support from your parents. They probably will be a great resource for you ...I hope you let them be.

It is a good decision to quit now while you are young and still healthy and there won't be anymore bad consequences. Have you tried AA?
Thank you! Yes they have been there for me forever, but never yelled.. just stared in disappointment and so I stopped coming home which added wrinkle on age to their face each night.. my mom is proud Iím reaching out though , so am I. Iím going to a meeting tomorrow for a matter of fact. I grew up going to them as a kid cause my parents went all the time. Thanks for the reply
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Old 03-28-2018, 11:53 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by MindfulMan View Post
Scary that the military enables alcoholism like that, but completely understandable that any latent drinking problem comes out with the stress of service. AND the drinking culture that exists when off base and off duty. I've known several Navy and Marines who had serious issues. There are many at the gay bars in San Diego in the grips of some pretty serious addiction.

Just don't celebrate the end of your service with a trip to the bars with buddies, military or otherwise.

It may or may not be a good idea yet, and you may be busy dealing with the aftereffects of lots of alcohol, but getting sober and sharing your experience is key If and when it's appropriate and you're ready, telling your family and loved ones can be helpful in keeping you sober, as it becomes harder to hide it from people if they know. Believe it or not more people than not are supportive and proud, especially family and romantic partners.

You may find that this journey is a tough one. So is being a Marine. You've proven that you've got the strength and courage to do this. You got through training and either combat or the possibility that you would have to be in combat.

I've known Marines, and there's a certain bond in the Corp that's hard to replicate, and was tough when they finished their service and it started to dissolve. Finding others going through what you are going through might make it much easier. They'll get it. Other groups are pretty essential, AA or otherwise. Having a plan to get and remain sober is crucial, there's plenty of information about this on the site.

Congrats on your 3 days. If you can make it the start of the rest of your life you will look back on this moment, as difficult as it is now, with humility and pride.
Thank you so much for the reply .. as you can tell this is a demon Iíve fought the past 4 years , but true demons came out when My roommate left and I had the room to myself. Like it really mattered cause I just closet drank from being ashamed to drink on a work day. My biggest challenge ahead is telling my friends , Iím building the courage to tell them Iím done for good , and if we have to quit hanging out cause of it so be it. Though I have hit up very close friends today and to my surprise they have quit their addictions as well.. I know who to chill with when Iím home . These past 72 hours have been the worst of my life . Absolutely no sleep , sweating constantly and 911 dialed at the ready finger resting next to the all button Incase I stopped breathing . Will post about my first AA meeting tomorrow!
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Old 03-29-2018, 05:18 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Hang in there DJ. You can do this. Stay close to SR. Every day will be less hard. Rooting for you.
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Old 03-29-2018, 07:00 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Glad you’re here. Good decision to quit. You can do it.
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