scottyboozer

Hi all.. I was drinking about 15 cans of beer a day 5% stuff on a normal kinda watchin my drinkin day. I would usually hold off till about 2pm to 4pm but sometimes start at noon and drink till 9pm usually. I was only eating once per day as could not stomach anything and would feel really rough u know like dry heaving and anxiety when the alcohol wore off. Usually by 9AM is when I would puke. I could only eat after I drank my 15 beers at 9 pm. When I really wanted to get at drinkin for a good time I would start in the morning and drink the hard stuff like rum or whisky with beer too all bloody day till I passed out in afternoon for a few hours then get drunk again till night then eat. I usually could only stomach at though for a few days then taper back to just the 15 beers. I did this repeatedly for over a year. I drank since I was a 19 year old. You know the story. 1 beer....2beer.....4beers and up and up over the years. I have been off work for a year due to injury so this really increased my habit. I have quit a 100 times. Detoxed a hundred times. All at home for the first day or so and the rest at work. The last detox was pretty rough. I always do it cold turkey. The last detox was bad. U know the drill... the shakes, dry heaves, anxiety through the roof. I was hearing music or a tune that would play over and over all day for over 24 hours. I was getting the mania feeling. Felt like i was going to die. Blood pressure really high but not goona pop high. I felt like running or something. Paced back and forth in the house all day and night till it finally started to let up around 48 hrs. Forget sleeping. No sleep for a few days. I think the 4th night I got some sleep. Horrible night mares and big electric shocks in my head that made my whole body jolt when laying down. Thought I was gonna have a stroke, or seizure. But didnt and survived. About day 3 to 4 I started feeling better... or like I was not going to die and could get some food down. I would drink tomato coctail and food replacement drinks and vitamins like crazy. But of course I stayed sober for I think 30 days then went back on the beer. It was the mind lying to me again. “just tonight, have a few beers... you have been sober for 30 days... tomorrow back on the wagon.” What a joke... I drank solid for another month but just the 15 pack of beer 5%. I knew I had to quit. I was getting these pains in my stomach area on both sides. I dont know... my kidneys maybe.. my liver. Christ my doctor even told me I have a fatty liver after all the blood work and scans that I had done. So here I was... and scared this time to cold turkey it so I read and read and read everything I could on alcohol withdrawals... read about tapering over and over again all day sometimes while drinking the 15 pack. How could i get off without dying this time. Last time was too scary. The internet says that I will drop dead in 48 hours if I quit cold turkey. Looked at the detox timeline 100 times. Benzo detox with a doctor. Well that will really suck and be embarising and maybe they will admit me and not let me outa the ER. Goes on your record too for life. Dam dam dam gotta be a better way or just a different way. So I tried HAMS or tapering. I could taper a beer down a day for a few days and even get down to 7 beers for a few days but always start ramping back up around the 7 beer mark and go back to base level which is 15 beers. It was because I would start feeling better and guts would not hurt as bad...I would start eating a bit better and get more fluids in me then back to party time I would go and be back at 15 beers a night. SO... I came up with a plan. I made myself a huge pot of spaghetti. Great big pot of spaghetti sauce loaded with everything...I mean everything in the fridge. Every kind of vegitable I could think of that would taste good. Celery, carrots, tomatoes, green pepper, oignons, loads of garlic etc. Loads of ground beef is key here... Thick with meat. I got loaves of garlic bread too to go with it. I then started my taper again after I picked up a few 15 packs. It went something like this.

First day. Started drinking at 2pm finish at 9 pm. Ate as much spagetti and meatsauce as I could handle after last beer at 9pm. Woke up at 2AM still bit drunk and had another big bowl of spagetti and bread.

Day 2 Started at bit later 4 pm ... felt a bit better today. I think it was all the extra pasta I ate 2 am. I drank 13 beer. I ate my spaghetti at 9pm and had another big bowl at 2 am when I woke to go bathroom with the bread of course. Hydrate like crazy and vitamins. Multi vitamins and vit a, d, b, calcium.

Day 3 feeling bit better again today. Started at 4pm and drank 12 beer. Continue to take vitamins and finished at 8pm today. Ate pasta. And vitamins. Woke at 2am and eat big bowl of pasta and bread. Keep hydrating as much as possible.

Day 4 start at 5 pm today. Hard and anxious but ok. Drank 10 beer. Hammered them down fast. Finished before 10pm. Ate pasta and bread till stuffed. Have to eat eat eat i told myself. Vitamins. Water. Woke at 2 for my fill of pasta again.

Day 5 start at 5 again and drank 9 beer. Finish at 9. pasta bread. Vitamins. Water. Woke at 2 eat more pasta and bread. Vitamins. Water.

Day 6 start at 6pm drank 8 beer .. finish half past 9 pm ...pasta... bread... vitamins.... I still could not eat much during the day at this point. Just toast or a bit of this or that. I remember feeling not too bad and got a sub sandwich loaded with meat and veggies. I could not sit there and eat it but brought it home and just took a bite of it say every half hour. I had it eaten by drinking time at 6 Pm though. So drank my 8 beer at this point... finish at 9 pm. Pasta and meatsauce bread. Vitamins. Hydrate like crazy all day. Trying to pee clear urine today is goal. Woke up lots to pee but ate my pasta at 2 am.

Day 7.... cold turkey..... feel pretty good. Medium anxiety throughout the day. Shaky. Waiting for 6 as that is when I have been drinking in the evening. Not bad. Ate I think a stirfry in evening today and another sub sandwich during the day 1 bite at a time. Stir fry was pretty small plate as all I could get down but not too bad withdrawal. Vitamins. Water. I think the salts help in the pasta ..so had a couple glasses of v8 and tomato juice for the salts and vegetables. Slept a bit. Toss and turn. Sweats a bit. Got some sleep a few hours. Anxiety was up there but not crazy at all just uncomfortable. Never had any other withdrawal symptoms that night. No dry heaves . But feeling sickly.
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Day 8 woke up ok. Still shaky but anxiety was less now. Just anxious feeling. No dry heaves. Feeling depressed and really down but able to eat some lunch. And supper. Shaky. Anxious. No energy. Lay in bed and rest and read on phone about quitting drinking all day. Sleep on and off but 6 hrs anyway

Day 9 ...ok Shakes are almost gone... Depressed as hell... but happy i make it .... thank god. I can eat good now. Not normal yet. But hungry again a bit. 2 good meals today. Tiny bit of anxiety. Keep on with vitamins every day and eat as much as I can. Best food I can find in the house. Little trouble falling asleep but slept in till 10 ... a solid 9 hour sleep.

Today is day 10. I feel almost normal today. Not as depressed. Joined alcohol mastery today. Watch recovery videos all day mostly. Shakes nearly gone completely. Anxiety is almost gone completely. Head is pretty clear. I made it. No danger to myself and no drugs. I had to quit cold turkey at the 8 beer mark as that is when I thought It was safe enough to quit cold turkey. That was the critical point when I start to feel pretty good and will ramp back up. So I quit at that point so as not to ramp back up to 15 beer like I had done on previous attempts. I hope you all the best. Just wanted to share my secret to gettin off the booze with spaghetti taper secret. Now the hard part starts....

Wastinglife

Gonna write this recipe out. I've wasted so much time in ER's. It wasn't in danger but I thought I was. The psychological aspect is much different from the physical aspect. There has been 2 times I should have gone to the ER but didn't. I was younger, having DT's, hallucinations. Didn't know about alcohol withdrawal then. ER doctors hate addicts in general. Taking up bed-space. They are not trained on addiction.

Rar

Hang in there Scotty. Rooting for you. Stay close to SR.

hpdw

well done on your method of getting sober . I always say its whatever works for you .
I,m just done coming off a relapse and although I could hardly eat yesterday I am ravished today and just made a stir fry and chicken curry for the family .

Wishing you well .

RetiredGuy

Good job, I hope that's the last time you need to go through that routine. Stay strong, if you stick with it you will find that sober life is much more rewarding than you ever thought. You will find alot of support in these forums.

Dee74

Hi and welcome Scotty.

I appreciate that some people find doctors a waste of time, or whatever - but I still say seeing a Dr is better than cold turkey or self-tapering.

I'm glad it worked out for you, but I might not have had a series of mini strokes had I seen a Dr during my last detox.

I'll never have the health back I once enjoyed - I'm doing ok....but yeah - I made a big mistake.

No matter how many tapering successes I read about here (and it's not that many) I still maintain good health is too precious to leave to advice over the internet.

D

scottyboozer

Well day 5 and still sober. Slept ok. Little broken up. Hard to fall to sleep but feel like I could sleep in more but have stuff to do today . Took some magnesum citrate to help sleep. Maybe it helped. The naturepathetic doc told me it could help bring my blood pressure down. So am trying it. Bp is ok at night but a little high during the day. Feel hungry this morning. Yesterday I had breakfast for the first time in a month. I feel more hungry today. Guts still hurt like a wierd achey feeling. That is concerning to me. Sooner or later I am go on a wreck something in my body if I don't make this quitting drinking thing stick. I been through this enough times. I must be bloody ******** to put my body through this.

scottyboozer

I chose to use alcohol to taper due to the fact that I am an addict. Whatever substance I take and it makes me feel good. My brain says yea yea yea. Get some more of that stuff. I hoard it. Save it up... take a bunch at once. Wow feels good. Let's mix it with some booze too ... that should feel good maybe even very good. Then I'm addicted to benzos and alcohol. Then I buy them illegaly over Internet. Then I die like rock star on a benzo alcohol binge like Whitney Houston.

KatR

I’m so glad you posted this. This is especially helpful for people that don’t have insurance and cannot afford help without it. Sometimes life’s s**t and you just gotta DIY! Keep it up!

scottyboozer

I am not giving advice. This is a story and documentation of my journey to help other addicts. Ultimately every one has to make the choice how to sober up. And to stay sober. After all the thing between your ears is in control and knows what kinda shape ur in.

scottyboozer

I really had no withdrawal during the taper. Now it was not easy during the day waiting for the drinkin time to come. I kept pushing it back later and later in the day. and drank about 2 or a bit more beer an hour. it was such a big relief to get to drinkin time to get my quota. you must stick to your quota. I could not taper down to 4 or2 or1 that is just teasing yourself. i would always fail and party on. So 8 beer was the number for me. and eat like crazy. after your ration of booze. vitamins like crazy. water like crazy. juice like crazy. slam protein shakes. slam v8. Then cut off and cold turkey...... I KEPT I THINK 7 BEER.... I kept em in a safe place nice and cool. They were my safety blanket. I have a blood pressure monitor that I bought at the drug store. I checked my bp on the cold turkey day kinda every few hours to be safe. I always remembered that if it got to high or my heart started to race too much I had those beers to slam and knew my blood pressure would drop like a rock if I had a couple of beer. So those beers were like a safety net if things got harrrrrry or bad. But they never. Day 1 cold turkey was ok. not too bad. not anything like before. no pacing all night or hearing **** and lightning jolts to my body and head. just felt like ****. but I knew no danger just had to tough it out. Everybody has to tough it out sometime to get off this alcohole. or the benzos if you went that route. JUST GET THROUGH THAT DAY. I would walk around and give myself personal afirmation.... that is just say. i'm gonna quit drinkin today. todays the day. I said that to myself a hundred times during the day. Cause you know u feel like **** and just a few beer and its all good again ... that is what your mind is saying. the first day is the worst...... only get throught this one day .... dont fu**in drink over and over. your only comming off of 8 beer. your ok. 8 beer is nothin. over and over. Kept buisy just like folding 1 shirt at a time and walk and put away. washing dishes. doing mindless stuff to keep moving and not watch the bloody clock even though I looked at it every hour on the hour and counted hours since the last swallow. GOTTA MAKE 24.... THEN ITS A CAKE WALK. and you know it was. once u hit the sheets I had it made.. I knew it. To not drink on cold turkey day is hard cause I always want the easy way out. Drinking sucked sucked sucked anyway. I really wasnt getting buzzed anymore. I was drinking to feel normal and not all hung over and amped up with anxiety. Day 2 and the cravings stop
... literaly stopped for me. I still have the 7 beer in the cooler. Kinda forgot about them now. Served their purpose. something inside of me doesnt want to pour them out. damn thing between my ears is planning somethin behind my back. But I am in control this time. So in a few min it will be done. .... THERE ITS DONE... Now to relax and get on with my life. But this time..... I will be doing it differently. I will be on here...SOBER RECOVERY.... POSTING PROGRESS AND FEELINGS..... FEEL FREE TO SAY HOW YOU ARE DOING. ... I would appreciate any feed back... positive or negative or tips please. I joined the alcohole mastery group of people for a very reasonable price and going to be on there every night instead of infront of the TV.
goin to do daily maintenance and keeping a journal so I never forget. Man I was blowing 600 a month on bloody booze. Thats a new nice car for my wife man. Or 2 trips to Wally World man for the family. The Naturalpath doc said I should take b12 vitamin and NAC and R-Alpha-lipoic Acid for my liver. to protect it and rebuild it. He first gave me milk thistle but made me feel sick. maybe i was allergic to it as is a plant. Best wishes fellow drunks. I put a sticker on the dash of my truck that sez .... DONT DO IT Onwards and Upwards.

scottyboozer

I dumped the 7 beer. my security blanket. I opened each beer and with each crack the smell of beer was in the air. The strong smell of alcohol was in the air. made me want to puke. U know it if you have quit before. the smell of booze is strong when you are sober and is really revolting and bad and strong. No wonder a police officer can smell you from a mile away. If he is standing and talking to you while you sit in your car at a check stop or something. You are cooked and done. He knows u been drinkin... its so strong the smell. To think that my wife put up with my stinkin alcohol breath and sweatin booze all night is amazing. I dont know how she put up with that. Walkin around the house in a bloody daze. stinkin of booze. all hung over and acting like an ******* . I had become a different person. The booze changed me. I was a jerk. JERK. Every day was about the booze. Do I have enough booze.... Am I sober now to drive to get more booze.... I have 6 but thats not enough. No I cant have 1 now cause I have to drive to get at least 15 more before I start. I cant go visiting today cause I am too hung over. Missed my grandpas funeral cause too hung over and shaky and emotional cause of the booze. I would drive through a town and notice every liquor store. I said to my dad one time as we passed through a town. Hey dad u know how many liquor stores there was back there.... 4 of em on the main road. he never noticed one. So went outside to throw the cans in the recycle bin. The stinkin smell of the rotton ole beer cans was repulsive. Did I smell like that in the morning to my wife? I think so. U know the days when you were sober and you ran into say a rough lookin person in say the grocery store and you got to within a meter of em and could smell the sick smell of booze and sweat. Back then it was like geeze poor bastard. should get some help or somethin. I wonder how many people thought that of me these days. Just something I was thinking about today. Depression is lifting a bit more today too I might add. The past haunts me.... Have to keep looking forward I am told. Hard though. Best of luck you guys. Sorry for the ramble but is part of my recovery and personal record. If it helps ya in any way. I hope it does... Cheers and keep a stiff upper lip.

MindfulMan

Glad it worked out for you! Definitely a roll of the dice...tapering with alcohol alone is not often successful, and unmoderated withdrawal is always a crapshoot.

I tried a librium taper at home, I ended up right back where I started. Previously when I'd been prescribed klonopin to get off alcohol I ended up addicted to both. What did finally work for me was an inpatient detox with valium. As I'd been drinking 4-5 bottles of wine a day around the clock (20 - 25 beers) for nearly 2 months and had many brutal self detoxes in the past my chances of horrible consequences with cold turkey were pretty high.

They put me on high doses of B-Complex in rehab, as thiamine deficiency is very harmful during heavy drinking and detox and can lead to very serious neurological issues. I took a multivitamin on top of that, plus some other medication and supplements.

Onward and upward for sure. What's your sobriety plan?

scottyboozer

Why did I relapse? a month ago I was sober and relapsed. I remember the smell of the beer when I cracked it. It smelled bad and strong alcohol smell. I took the first sip after sober for a month. It tasted bad. I thought about dumpin it I remember. But I didn't I drank it anyway. Wanted the escape. Wanted the drug. Wanted the alcohol. wanted to get outa my head. I made the decision to get drunk again. But I had a choice. I could have went out for a walk. But I chose to drink it even though it tasted bad. U know though I fell off the wagon hours before I actually drank. It happened in my head. I gave myself the permission to drink. I somehow justified it.. crazy crazy crazy. and started the drive to get booze. I almost turned around a few times. but didn't. But there was a battle going on in my head I remember. Why did I fail last month? I heard some people say write out the pros and cons to drinking. and what happens after just one. a letter for yourself which I never do. Promise yourself to read it before you go into the booze store. Before you get in the truck to go. Will it work? I dunna know but goin to try it this time. Watch a utube video every day on drinkin too. post my feelings too . keep up the fight and not get complacent. cheers Folks. Best of luck to ya all

scottyboozer

Ya thanks, joined kevin o'hara alcohol mastery program. personal consultations and group chat and forums too every day and week. Watch daily videos from his website and on utube. gonna stay on this site too and post how things are goin every day for 30 days too.

orderfororder

I'm glad that you were able to taper off successfully. I sort of tapered (went from a day of vodka to a six pack of beers the next day) but I essentially quit cold turkey. And that is always a gamble. So grateful to have made it out of the range where seizures are more likely, because that is what scared me.

daveglass1

Hi - Ive done rehab - Ive done Librium from the Doc - many times in last 30 years or so Ive been in bad places. Marriage ended - two kids no longer speak to me - two jobs lost. You get the drift.
This time I took a week and kept busy. Drank enough to stop the shakes getting too out of hand only - I think I got through 3 bottles that week - used a lot the first few days of course. But here I am - on the cusp of 21 days and happy with progress. I am remarkably unstressed and my mind is free to wander rather than focus on getting my next fix.
Well done to you and finding your Spaghetti Junction.
Regards
Dave 🤠

Anna

Again, please know that detoxing from alcohol can be very unpredictable. What worked one time may not work the next. And, what worked for one person may not work for another.

It's always best to talk to your dr before detoxing.

BreezyFe

Thanks for the share. Reading your day by day struggles brought on memories. I had quit in Jan. but had a relapse in Feb (I know what brought it on). The withdrawal was horrible in Jan. but my last relapse involved lots of vodka & let me tell you-I was scared. No dt's or anything like that, just nausea, retching, shaking, sweats, rapid heart, weak, anxiety, nightmares etc. Withdrawals get worse by age & continued use, at least it was for me. Put it this way, hubby suggested drinking beer to taper & not to go cold turkey (he was scared). Luckily I had 2 pills left that my Dr gave me yrs ago for withdrawal (lorazepan). I had to take one my first night (I don't take pills even for headaches or colds except vitamins-ironic ). That's how bad it was.

I survived. Like you I knew my body & tapered on a 6 pack for 4 days. I definitely would have gone to emergency if needed.
Now I feel great. This last time has forced me to make Dr appts that I ignored while drinking. I'm rediscovering myself.

Best to you. Onward & upward.

RVer

Glad you’re staying sober and dumped that beer.