John9

Hi!

Went to a pub yesterday, It was an small underground rock venue and a good friend of mine performed there with her starting punk band.

I didn´t drink, felt wierd seeing all those drunk people, seeing the way they behaved. I was definetly juding them, because I know I used to be just like them. Glad I went, good reminder what alcohol makes me behave like, without trying my self.

Having a nice non-hungover sunday morning coffe .

August252015

It's early days to do something like that, based on your join date. Glad you didn't drink; I know that I sure didn't put myself in any drinking situations.

What's you plan for staying sober?

Glad you're here with us.

DangerZone

I was the same way in the early days of sobriety. You have to get used to it. Once you do going out sober will not be a big deal at all.

John9

Well, yesterday my plan was to go by car and taking just enough cash to pay the entrance fee. That meant, even if I had a drink somehow, I couldnt get home with my car and I did not have enough money in my pocket even to affoard one drink.

As my plan in general - finally working on 12 step program . First meeting still pending, since I´m slighty socially awkward and not comfortable around new people.

D122y

John,

Nice job hanging in there during the concert.

I didn't deny myself a fun during my early days. I tried to not make a big deal out of me staying clean...even though it was life or death.

Most of the time folks are not pushy. I can count on 1 hand the times they were...barely. Some folks don't get sobriety. I get that.

For me...going out and doing fun things was always on the table because towards the end of my drinking days, I was denying myself fun because I only wanted to drink until I couldn't walk right.

So going out to a show, if I had a driver, meant I would probably fall asleep during the show.

Goin out to dinner, if I had a driver, meant pre drinking because once I was full, I couldn't get drunk quickly enough. So sad.

Going to friends house, if I had a driver, meant getting wasted and hitting on all the women and wives. It was pathetic.

So me experience is I really am learning to enjoy sober life. The more I do it the better I get at it.

Now sober as a saint, I find myself having amazing experiences more and more. I see folks drinking, but as an addict I don't envy someone having 1 or 2 beers...that never made sense to me.

But, I also don't envy the folks that get drunk. The way drunks act and knowing the ramifications doesn't make sense to me either.

Basically, I am a quietly proud non drinker.

The thing is...I still crave. But, it is weakening each time I deal w life sober.

Thanks for the post.

BreezyFe

Congrats on a job well done. I'd take yesterday's experience as a constant reminder that sobriety in social settings is achievable.

anxiousrock

You still have to live your life. Going out is way more fun that staying home. Drinking or not.

MindfulMan

I was too ill to go out much at all for 6 weeks. I wouldn't have trusted myself to go to a bar for live music until around 5 months in. My first live show was at a large venue, not a bar, so I felt a bit more comfortable. It was strange walking past the bars and not getting a drink.

Once I sat down I started getting into the groove, it was an Alt-J show. My friends are a couple. She can't drink for medical reasons (long story) and he was not having a beer for my sake.

I went to the bathroom. On the way back I said screw it. I got a beer for him and a ginger ale for myself, took them back to the seats and enjoyed the rest of the show (better on the last tour, but nothing's perfect.)

After that I was able to go to bars for smaller shows. It WAS strange at first, and watching intoxicated people I definitely couldn't believe that I behaved like that and drank at shows. I got over it. Nothing is better than being present for a show totally sober.

Soberchella is the next challenge.

I'd just be very observant. Even now I have always have an exit plan. About a month or so after the Alt-J show I had an incredibly strong trigger walking past a restaurant serving bottomless bloody marys at brunch. Had my phone out ready to call my counsellor at IOP.

I say do what you need to do to say safely within your limits. For me, I found it got easier.

Dee74

I'd never suggest people draw the curtains and sit at home in the dark

There's nothing wrong with going out - but I think we can use a little caution and discretion too.

I knew the kind of events that might challenge my newly born recovery and I avoided them til I was stronger

D