beginning
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 22
beginning
Hello, I've begun my journey through sobriety. Yesterday I went to the wake of a long time friend, who was also my boozing buddy. I don't want to keep this endless loop going anymore. There's no real fun reason to drink anymore. I've tried quitting so many times, but always went back. I feel like quitting and moving on with my life is a good tribute to him.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: GA
Posts: 700
I'm so sorry about your friend. It brings then thought of MY best drinking buddy laying there. I cant imagine. Hope and love for those sick and struggling.
Drinking is definitely less fun when you realize you have a problem. I ignored it for a while, trying to keep the fun going. It turned on me and made my life a living hell. I can't wait to see your journey to sobriety. Congratulations <3
Drinking is definitely less fun when you realize you have a problem. I ignored it for a while, trying to keep the fun going. It turned on me and made my life a living hell. I can't wait to see your journey to sobriety. Congratulations <3
Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 327
Dr. Wayne Dyer said, "when you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." Looking at booze as a destructive force in our lives that brings us nothing but pain is the first step in making the mental change required to begin the journey to sobriety.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 22
day 4, getting cranky.
The weekend is coming, and I feel dread. The drinking patterns are so locked in for that time period it's going to be weird to work around it. I'm planning things to do to fill up the time, but they seem too small. Drinking, makes it all one big thing. Activities are basically just a back drop for drinking, down times between activities are filled by drinking. I have a plan, though, I read about planning here and I'll just work the plan and look forward to going to bed sober.
The weekend is coming, and I feel dread. The drinking patterns are so locked in for that time period it's going to be weird to work around it. I'm planning things to do to fill up the time, but they seem too small. Drinking, makes it all one big thing. Activities are basically just a back drop for drinking, down times between activities are filled by drinking. I have a plan, though, I read about planning here and I'll just work the plan and look forward to going to bed sober.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
It's tough when that fervor of initial commitment starts to fade, doubts creep in, the addictive voice starts working on your resolve.
But remember why you quit. Stay firm. Everyone who has gotten sober and remained so has gone through what you are going through and made it through the other end. You can too.
But remember why you quit. Stay firm. Everyone who has gotten sober and remained so has gone through what you are going through and made it through the other end. You can too.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Florida., USA
Posts: 3,252
Hi Thankful. Getting through this weekend will make next weekend less bad. It's good you're going to keep yourself busy. During your less busy times, stay close to SR and read the threads. Post if you want to contribute or are struggling. You can do this. Rooting for you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 22
OK, this is number five, OMG I'm still alive.
Went out for dinner last night, seated near the bar, and there were some really loud drunks left over from happy hour. It was like fingernails on a chalkboard. Even at my worst I, well, I don't know what I was like since I don't remember. And I can't ask my friends since I lost most of them due to this stuff. Drank Coors NA, not terrible. When I think of the absurd concoctions I drank in the past, it was fine.
Anyway, 9:00 AM, seize the day. Just making it past lunchtime sober will be a whole new world. I really hope every single person here has a good day and goes to bed sober.
Went out for dinner last night, seated near the bar, and there were some really loud drunks left over from happy hour. It was like fingernails on a chalkboard. Even at my worst I, well, I don't know what I was like since I don't remember. And I can't ask my friends since I lost most of them due to this stuff. Drank Coors NA, not terrible. When I think of the absurd concoctions I drank in the past, it was fine.
Anyway, 9:00 AM, seize the day. Just making it past lunchtime sober will be a whole new world. I really hope every single person here has a good day and goes to bed sober.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Thank,
Ime...the crave never goes away. It got weaker and i got stronger.
I think about drinking sometimes and now I know there is no point.
It is a highly addictive neurotoxin that alters our central nervous system.
I am much better now, but I have permanent brain damage that I had to adapt to. I relate it to learning to walk again. It has taken nearly 3 years and my spatial orientation is returning. My brain rewired around the dead areas.
I noticed this degeneration over 10 years ago, but my addiction was strong enough that I ignored the signs. The internet was not what it is today. That is what really saved me.
Know I have the knowledge. I embrace sobriety. On my priority list it is next to breathing. I fight the craves.
I use SR to remind me of the hell I left behind and to provide me endorphins by helping folks.
Thanks.
Ime...the crave never goes away. It got weaker and i got stronger.
I think about drinking sometimes and now I know there is no point.
It is a highly addictive neurotoxin that alters our central nervous system.
I am much better now, but I have permanent brain damage that I had to adapt to. I relate it to learning to walk again. It has taken nearly 3 years and my spatial orientation is returning. My brain rewired around the dead areas.
I noticed this degeneration over 10 years ago, but my addiction was strong enough that I ignored the signs. The internet was not what it is today. That is what really saved me.
Know I have the knowledge. I embrace sobriety. On my priority list it is next to breathing. I fight the craves.
I use SR to remind me of the hell I left behind and to provide me endorphins by helping folks.
Thanks.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,432
I stayed away from bars for a long time. there's plenty of places ion my hometown to eat where alcohol's not available.
what do you think made you go for the NA beer?
why make it harder on yourself?
D
what do you think made you go for the NA beer?
why make it harder on yourself?
D
Last edited by Dee74; 03-26-2018 at 04:19 PM.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 260
I’ve bought the NA stuff a few weeks ago. . A 6 pack. Thinking it was the taste I’d be missing. Turns out it wasn’t the taste I was missing. I still have 3in the fridge. I am an alcoholic that drank to get drunk. ONE day at a time Thankful. ONE day. You can do this. Just stick to your plan
Last edited by Dee74; 03-26-2018 at 04:20 PM. Reason: no brands please :)
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Get to meetings or the weekends realky helped me. It broke the days up, to have me renewed strength and focus, meant I got to see and hear how it IS possible for our lives to be improved through long term sobriety (no matter how hopeless I felt when I arrived), and gave me a reason to get showered, dress and look after myself a bit. Also the walk there was a but of exercise and meant I was more likely to cook and eat a proper meal later on.
Might be worth checking out the days, times and locations of the ones in your area so you at least have the info to hand. You don't book in advance or anything, but just show up.
BB
Might be worth checking out the days, times and locations of the ones in your area so you at least have the info to hand. You don't book in advance or anything, but just show up.
BB
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 22
Checking in, a Saturday night finished, very restless, very anxious, but had to go out. Sitting around the house was driving me crazy, that's where the drinking always kicked in. Usually I got so wasted at home I didn't bother going out.
The NA beer wasn't a trigger for me, Dee, I drank it like a placebo. That said, I'm usually not a beer drinker so it's not like I'm craving beer. I've just been craving , that state just this side of consciousness. My mind just keeps going "what am I going to do next, what am I going to do next". It's tiring, if I drank it would turn off, I would relax. I know this is a phase, I get it, but man it's tiring during down times.
Thanks for the advice on the meeting Barry. I should have gone to one. I was thinking I shouldn't go until at least a week or two, to make sure quitting this time is real. But that doesn't make sense, now that I said it out loud.
Thanks so much everybody. I have to get out of the house. This used to be my safe place, now it's the scene of the crime. I know that will pass too, when I can start calming down. Have a great day all, go to bed sober.
The NA beer wasn't a trigger for me, Dee, I drank it like a placebo. That said, I'm usually not a beer drinker so it's not like I'm craving beer. I've just been craving , that state just this side of consciousness. My mind just keeps going "what am I going to do next, what am I going to do next". It's tiring, if I drank it would turn off, I would relax. I know this is a phase, I get it, but man it's tiring during down times.
Thanks for the advice on the meeting Barry. I should have gone to one. I was thinking I shouldn't go until at least a week or two, to make sure quitting this time is real. But that doesn't make sense, now that I said it out loud.
Thanks so much everybody. I have to get out of the house. This used to be my safe place, now it's the scene of the crime. I know that will pass too, when I can start calming down. Have a great day all, go to bed sober.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 22
day seven - exercising and goal setting in that department, will be running some road races. Seems like a flood of options suddenly exist, all the things I've put off due to this stuff are still there.
It occurred to me my first day sober was 3/20. It was the day after I went to the wake of a 32 year drinking buddy. It was the birthday of my father, 14 years gone, who always advised and shared. It's the first day of Spring, the season of New Beginnings. Talk about a confluence of pointers toward a better place. Being here really helps, thanks to the people that make it possible and for the support.
It occurred to me my first day sober was 3/20. It was the day after I went to the wake of a 32 year drinking buddy. It was the birthday of my father, 14 years gone, who always advised and shared. It's the first day of Spring, the season of New Beginnings. Talk about a confluence of pointers toward a better place. Being here really helps, thanks to the people that make it possible and for the support.
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