Needing a lift
Member
Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 312
That's good to know. Glad you have some family around you. We're the same - the hospital in our smaller town doesn't exactly have the best reputation but if we drive to the larger city nearby there's much better care available there.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: California
Posts: 182
I'm on Day 1, for the millionth time...and I hate it. Every time I relapse I feel absolutely terrible and hate myself for doing it. You won't want to look yourself in the mirror...its not worth it at all in my opinion. I hate that I grieve for it like a dead friend I'll never see again; it's like we think it's our best companion and it's truly just poison to mask all this crap that keeps building because we keep drinking. I hate that cycle. Stay off the rollercoaster.
If it helps, I'm currently in tears and absolutely mortified that I took home this man I've had a massive crush on for months while completely inebriated the other night. I don't remember anything I said or even if I was a decent lay. I would marry this guy, and after months of building a flirtatious friendship, wanting to earn his affection and respect, I blew it. He thinks I'm a cheap ***** with a drinking problem...it makes me wonder if he's right.
We are so much better than our addiction and we deserve to experience life and be seen as we truly are. Not as our addiction. I have to believe that...its the only thing that's keeping me away from the liquor store around the corner.
If it helps, I'm currently in tears and absolutely mortified that I took home this man I've had a massive crush on for months while completely inebriated the other night. I don't remember anything I said or even if I was a decent lay. I would marry this guy, and after months of building a flirtatious friendship, wanting to earn his affection and respect, I blew it. He thinks I'm a cheap ***** with a drinking problem...it makes me wonder if he's right.
We are so much better than our addiction and we deserve to experience life and be seen as we truly are. Not as our addiction. I have to believe that...its the only thing that's keeping me away from the liquor store around the corner.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 752
Screw it I’ve listened to my AV and my husband most of my life and you can see where it has got me I’m heading to hospital cause option b is drinking and option c you don’t want to know probably I’m nervous but I have to do this
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: GA
Posts: 700
Originally Posted by Hawking22 
I'm on Day 1, for the millionth time...and I hate it. Every time I relapse I feel absolutely terrible and hate myself for doing it. You won't want to look yourself in the mirror...its not worth it at all in my opinion. I hate that I grieve for it like a dead friend I'll never see again; it's like we think it's our best companion and it's truly just poison to mask all this crap that keeps building because we keep drinking. I hate that cycle. Stay off the rollercoaster.
If it helps, I'm currently in tears and absolutely mortified that I took home this man I've had a massive crush on for months while completely inebriated the other night. I don't remember anything I said or even if I was a decent lay. I would marry this guy, and after months of building a flirtatious friendship, wanting to earn his affection and respect, I blew it. He thinks I'm a cheap ***** with a drinking problem...it makes me wonder if he's right.
We are so much better than our addiction and we deserve to experience life and be seen as we truly are. Not as our addiction. I have to believe that...its the only thing that's keeping me away from the liquor store around the corner.
If it helps, I'm currently in tears and absolutely mortified that I took home this man I've had a massive crush on for months while completely inebriated the other night. I don't remember anything I said or even if I was a decent lay. I would marry this guy, and after months of building a flirtatious friendship, wanting to earn his affection and respect, I blew it. He thinks I'm a cheap ***** with a drinking problem...it makes me wonder if he's right.
We are so much better than our addiction and we deserve to experience life and be seen as we truly are. Not as our addiction. I have to believe that...its the only thing that's keeping me away from the liquor store around the corner.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: California
Posts: 182
Thank you, goodbyevan...I really appreciate the encouragement.
And Nichole, if I were you I absolutely would go to the hospital if you can. It will keep you safe and away from the darkness.
Praying for you tonight ♡ Stay strong
And Nichole, if I were you I absolutely would go to the hospital if you can. It will keep you safe and away from the darkness.
Praying for you tonight ♡ Stay strong
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 752
Thanks everyone, I hate putting my problems out there cause I know most of us are struggling fighting addiction...and last thing you need is me wasting your time!!
But I'm alive it took two attempts to get me into the hospital building first time was an adventure in parking lot and left second time I knew the outcome so I grew some lady balls and went for it!!!
Thanks y’all I truly appreciate y’all obviously I’m still alive
oooo yea sober too
But I'm alive it took two attempts to get me into the hospital building first time was an adventure in parking lot and left second time I knew the outcome so I grew some lady balls and went for it!!!
Thanks y’all I truly appreciate y’all obviously I’m still alive
oooo yea sober too
Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: 45th Parallel, Michigan
Posts: 816
Really glad you're feeling better. Posting here is the opposite of wasting people's time, by the way; it's the entire reason for this website.
And "lady balls" made me laugh out loud. Thanks for my morning chuckle! See, you helped me already today...
And "lady balls" made me laugh out loud. Thanks for my morning chuckle! See, you helped me already today...
Member
Join Date: Dec 2017
Location: United States
Posts: 2,547
Nichole, I'm so glad you went to the hospital to get the help you need. Please tell the doctors how bad things have gotten for you, they are there to help but need every scrap of info you can give them. I'll be thinking of you and hope you post soon. 
Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 132
So glad everything worked out. .As far as wasting people's time-there is no such thing. We are family here and we all need each other in way or another.
Put it this way, we all care about each other. The first thing I did this morning is log on and see if things worked out for you. So happy that your ok & sober too!
Put it this way, we all care about each other. The first thing I did this morning is log on and see if things worked out for you. So happy that your ok & sober too!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 312
I'm so glad that you went Nichole, you're really brave and I'm sure this is a great step in your recovery. I hope you're doing ok this morning. And yeah, I agree with the others, please never think that you're "wasting our time" by talking about you. We're here for each other, that's why we're here.
Take care and please let us know how you're doing when you can.
Take care and please let us know how you're doing when you can.
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