Jae6440

I recently went to the doctor for a check up. I ended up breaking down and revealing that I drink every night and more than 5 drinks a night. I also went on a 3 day bender at home a few days before I met with her. I’m tired of living my life in a haze, and I do want to get sober. I was surprised after sharing all this that the doctor advised me to not quit drinking cold turkey. Has anyone else gotten this advice? I’m not currently insured so detox is not an option. What should I do? I would like to start going to meetings, but I know they don’t let you share if you have been drinking. Not that I would drink before the meeting, but I feel bad knowing I would have to go home and drink a glass of wine. Has anyone had this same experience? Sorry feeing lost.

columbus

"but I know they don’t let you share if you have been drinking."

I'm not in AA, but are you sure this is true?

goodbyeevan

When I started going to meetings i didn't share. I still don't unless it's small. I prefer to listen and still find it encouraging.

DontRemember

I've been to meetings 'buzzed'. I've been to meetings with vodka in my cup. I've stopped for beer/booze after meetings. I've also shared at 99% of the meetings I've attended. I've met many people coming off of binges at meetings and could smell the liquor on them. As long as they're not unruly, I think an AA meeting is a great place for a drunk to be.

daredevil

I've heard a fair share of people with a buzz sharing. All membership requires is a desire to stop drinking.

biminiblue

If I were you I would go back to that doctor and ask for help with an at-home medical detox. The meds are inexpensive and just for a few days.

She told you not to go cold-turkey because it can lead to problems. I'm surprised she didn't offer you any other options, but you can call or go back and request help.

AA meetings will give you access to people who will help you with this, as well. Talk to people before and after meetings. They've seen it all, drinking before or after meetings is pretty common. The whole function of AA is to help people stop. Your story is part of the struggle.

Do you think you can wean off in three days? I did that, and luckily I didn't have too many problems, but it could have just as easily gone the other way, I suppose. Some people just can't wean off, but I was able to - I was DONE.

Regardless, don't keep drinking.

Here's some info from Sober Recovery about Detox:

https://www.soberrecovery.com/addict...eatment/detox/

Outonthetiles

Not giving medical advice, but anecdotally, I went cold turkey and I didn't die. I remember two distinct instances of going through withdrawals while at work, once in a meeting, and I just powered through it.

2muchpain

I agree with your doctor. Going cold turkey can be risky and it is really tough without some form of help. Is she willing to prescribe something short-term to cut down on withdrawals?
As far as AA is concerned, the most important thing is that you show up. Many people start going to meetings and continue to drink, but eventually quit. Like someone else said, you don't have to share. Just being there and listening can be very helpful. John

DontRemember

**Not medical advice** But, "more than 5 drinks a night" is honestly how many?...also..what's a "3 day bender" for you?

Anna

I think you must listen to your dr who gave you the advice. However, I wonder if you asked her for medical help while detoxing? What advice did she give you as far as detoxing, because it's very difficult for alcoholics to taper their drinking?

And, I'm not an AA person, but I believe the only qualification at a meeting is to want to stop drinking.

Delilah1

I agree about asking your doctor for help with detoxing, and possibly a referral for face to face support after.

Komplex

Great job for being honest with your doctor and for deciding to get sober.

I asked my doctor to prescribe medicine to detox at home. He did, gave us emergency numbers, and advised me to stay with someone for the first four days. I did it, it wasn’t terrible. If your dr can’t help, try a different dr, or ask for help by calling the AA hotline or going to a meeting. They may be able to refer you to affordable/free resources. I went to AA on day four and have gone ever since. I’ve been at meetings where someone was drunk a couple times. I’ve smelled alcohol on people and heard from members who were still drinking. The only desire to be a member is a desire to stop drinking.

entropy1964

It depends on the 'group consciousness' (aka individual meeting guidelines determined by members) but the meetings I go to ask you not to share if you've been drinking. They ask you to stick around after the meeting and get help and support. It's all very polite, the intention is if someone is really hammered it doesn't devolve.

But that should never discourage anyone from going when drunk and getting help. Man the regulars love it when they have someone new that they can support. What it's all about.

Jae6440

It varies but, 5 drinks for me probably equals ten. I’m a bartender and all my “friends” are bartenders, so we kind of hook each other up at each others bars. A 3 day bender is I got one of those 1.75 bottles of vodka on Monday, woke up drank all day, and repeated on Wednesday till the bottle was empty.

icewater1961

Just wanting to throw my two pennies into the discussion. If you don't have healt insurance no hospital should deny treatment. Not offering legal or medical advice but there are lots of programs in place that could help you. Check it out.

Dee74

Hi Jae -

despite the fact I detoxed many times cold turkey and was ok - I wasn't ok my last time

Things can go wrong.

If you didn't receive any instructions from your Dr about what to do if not cold turkey I'd go back and ask, or find a new doctor.

D

DontRemember

I feel ya! I'm no longer a bartender,but have bar owner/tender clients and know how it goes. What's a 'normal' mixed drink.. 4 count? mine were 20 counts. Not to scare you away from sobriety,but those "friends" will dwindle. I still have I think 6/20 that don't need/want something from me.. My life is more peaceful though and I see I was only a 'superficial fixture' at those places. Like you, I get my drinks for free, if I want. It's so fake/superficial when you get sober.

BarbieKen

Good advice Delilah. Before I got sober, my FIL was admitted to the hospital for serious health problems. He was an all day bourbon in a tumbler drinking all day guy. In order to monitor any kind of Detox, before treating his health issues, he was hooked up to an IV. The Family was told it was medicinal alcohol. Wow!

When I finally went in to Kaiser, admitted my desire to quit alcohol. The next thing I knew my husband and son were driving to the Detox Wing at a Kaiser Hospital. NO cold turkey! Dr. Told me That this method can be dangerous and life threatening! I remembered my now deceased alcoholic FIL. Detox was my choice too.
Bobbi

Jae6440

Thank you everyone. I have been drinking a couple of glasses of wine over the weekend and will be going to the doctor to make the next step to my sobriety. It's hard to even drink the wine at this point, because I am done with feeling this way. I recently read a quote from Daniel Radcliffe. It's nothing mind blowing but it's exactly what I feel right now.
"I was living in constant fear of who I'd meet, what I might have said to them, what I might have done to them, so I'd stay in my apartment for days and drink alone. It was pathetic - it wasn't me. I'm a fun polite person, and it turned me into a rude bore. For a long time people were saying to me , 'We think you have a problem,' but in the end I had to come to the realization myself"
I'm DONE being a rude bore, because two years ago I was fun, polite person.

DesertDawg

Absolutely agree with Dee's advice. I had the same experience...detoxed many times and was OK. Until I detoxed and I wasn't OK. I don't want to be alarmist, but I had withdrawal seizures twice. If I'd just sought some medical advice, I could have detoxed safely. I'm very surprised your doctor didn't offer more help other than telling you not to quit cold turkey. Typically, they can prescribe medication that will ease withdrawal symptoms and help you detox safely.