Jess1998

I just keep thinking I can't do this. I've tried so hard to get sober only to mess up bigger and better then last time. I'm right now shame spiraling and I don't know how to stop. I feel like such an embarrassment and failure right now. How do you guys deal with it?

Elle126

Jess, I will leave it for the big guys who know what they are talking about to guide you here. All I can say is that I totally know how you feel right now, have been there more times than I care to remember. You've come to a good place where people can give you the help and sort you need. What I do know is YOU CAN DO THIS.
Take care
Elle

lessgravity

Shame, embarrassment exhaustion - all typical feelings in the begining and throughout trying to get sober. I'm only 30 something days in, after trying many times before.

Those are just feelings though - they come and go. Your alcoholic voice might jump on those feelings and use them to make you drink again - "look at you, you are so ashamed, won't some booze make you feel better.."

The thing early on is just not drinking.

How can you help yourself do that?

D122y

Jess,

When I am feeling like it is all too much I pray.

I am not an overly religious person, but I believe in God.

It is a mystery how it works for me, but it does.

This might be very weird for you to handle, but it is honestly the only way I made it past a few days sober. My God saved me from my death spiral.

The Lord's Prayer and Hail Mary are my go to's.

The Lord's Prayer is the soul saver.

Hope this helps you.

Thanks.

John9

Hi Jess,

I´m in the same boat as you are, currently on my day 3. And I can totally relate to you. I do have tried many-many times, up until now to get sober. Relapses are very common in early recovery, and it´s nothing to be ashamed of. Its important for you to get back up again, learn from mistakes made and move on. Try not to beat your self up too much. Live in the present not in the past, everyone makes mistakes.

I wish you the very best.

Jess1998

Ok so instead of sitting around and ruminating on my relapse I'm going to do something that I've probably needed to do for a while. I'm gonna my recovery plan and a relapse plan and work on forgiving myself for messing up

sobersolstice

I have relapsed so many times it's ridiculous. For me, it's my last go at stopping. I'm not missing out on anything. I love that it's Saturday morning, and I can appreciate not being hungover.

I'm on day two as well.

Nonsensical

Translation: I'm in a locked cage! I'm in a locked cage!

Translation: I'm looking for the key! I'm looking for the key!

And THAT, my friend, is how you get it done.

Mummyto2

You can't change the past, but you can change the future, the shame guilt etc is what drives the addiction and we continue on this spiral, whatever has happened use it as a positive in your recovery, shame & guilt are just emotions like feeling happy and peaceful, use this as a way forward and don't be hard on yourself, I have never met a perfect person in my life, or anyone who hasn't made mistakes, and I guarantee you I never will good luck