Odd text from husband
 

Hi All,

Today wasn't as bad as previous days with the AV coming up but I am not holding my breath that it is never going to pipe up again (although I would be thankful if that were the case).

My husband rarely drinks. Maybe a gin and tonic twice a year. It is definitely not one of his issues. Today he sent me a text saying studies show that people who drink 2 glasses of wine or beer a day live 18% longer than those who don't drink at all. I found this very weird. He never thought I had a problem but that may be because I hid the quantity I drank from him. When I asked why he sent the text he said he just thought I would find that interesting.

I am staying the course though. One day at a time.

I read a reputable source that said the people who frequently have 1-2 drinks usually do so in social setting and that it's the social interaction they have that extends longevity. Being connected that is. And not the actual drinking itself. Towards the end of my drinking, it was mostly an isolated activity. I'd venture to say that loneliness kills just as many as alcoholism.

I think those statistics are suspect. And probably in some way carry a skew that tracks to how many people drink.

But in any case, drinking doesn’t enrich my life, it robs the quality of my life.

That to me is what’s important

Pretty sure if I have one or two drinks any day I’ll eventually end up dead or worse hurt someone else....with plenty of shame, guilt, and hiding along the way.

80% of statistics are made up. Tell him that one to let him know you don’t appreciate it. A such sarcasm as you can muster for effect of course.

Just today I could tell that both my boss and best friend - who are both helping me big time through my darkest hour - we’re very skeptical when I told them I’m an alcoholic. I don’t really blame them though. They haven’t enjoyed it first hand for themselves so how could they really know?

a very big reason SR forum is so important to so many of us - having somewhere to share our truth with. Even as I am reading others' posts I find myself in so many others struggles. Thank you for sharing.

I also think many of the so-called statistics are manufactured from big business, Pharma etc. You and only you know the right path for your life. Be strong!

I’d be interested to know who funded this particular study...

For me it would start as 1. The second I felt a buzz it would be straight to hell in a handbasket getting as drunk as quickly as I could and wake up hungover again and again again and again and again again and again. Back to square 1.
Not for me.
Food for thought if you were actually considering listening to that "study".

Yeah, I've been hearing that one a lot. I'm always a little suspicious of science journalism (it's usually exaggerated compared to the actual study), so I looked into it.

It turns out the study, performed by Dr. Claudia Kawas, hasn't actually been released yet. But she announced her findings at a recent conference (which is where many journalists have gotten their info). The design was a survey of people aged 90-99 regarding their lifestyle and habits. So, right there, it isn't a very precise study since it's survey-based (ie, reliant upon people giving correct information about themselves). Secondly, the study also found that regular exercise, social and cognitive engagement, and a few extra pounds in older age are associated with longevity.

And anyway, correlation does not equal causation. Many studies have pointed to the fact that socializing is associated with a longer lifespan. I think many who drink in moderation tend to also be more social, which is what confuses the correlation here. I could be wrong, of course.

Either way, even if alcohol legitimately did increase lifespan, the study refers to moderate use, not the excessive and dangerous amount many former drinkers here engaged in.

ChowChow,
I don’t think you should look too seriously on your husbands comments. People who don’t have a drinking problem often have no clue when it comes to what it takes to quit and how you can’t drink anymore. I have a friend who 6 years after my last drink still asks if I want a beer when I see him.

He may be trying to give some comfort to you and your concerns over drinking. " Look Honey, this article here says you are okay. I wish you weren't so hard on yourself" ...

I think it was a loving gesture. I also don't know your relationship so it's an outsiders perspective.

... As you said, he doesn't know the extent of your drinking. Have you told him?

This study has been all over the place from it's "catchy" headline, "woo hoo! drinking is good for you!" though no one actually reads the study.
It was ongoing following the lifestyles of those over 90 years old to see if there was a correlation with others that seemed to be the key to why they lived so long.
One of the finding was that many of them were social drinkers, maybe one or two. This finding was cherry picked and the "drinking is good for you!" crap went viral.

My problem was 1 or 2 happened in the first hour, and then I continued to refill my glass for another 1 or 2, and another...

I'm going with healthy habits are going to increase my life expectancy, and improve my enjoyment of life.

For an alcoholic of my type, having two drinks a day would be a living hell.

I've heard this before. In fact I seem to be hearing it more and more since I quit. It may hold water for those who can moderate, but not for us. I ignore it.

I hear you!!

To ChowChow...
Ya, I think maybe your husband was kind of sending the info to comfort you? Like oh .. It's ok to drink. See the doctors say its good for you.

We all know this ain't the case... Gosh, I am still thinking how I could drink "2" drinks a day...... Like Gattalife said "Would be living hell".....

heres results from some studies by the WHO:
-In 2015, 26.9 percent of people ages 18 or older reported that they engaged in binge drinking in the past month.
-In 2012, 3.3 million deaths, or 5.9 percent of all global deaths (7.6 percent for men and 4.0 percent for women), were attributable to alcohol consumption.
-In 2014, the World Health Organization reported that alcohol contributed to more than 200 diseases and injury-related health conditions, most notably DSM–IV alcohol dependence (see sidebar), liver cirrhosis, cancers, and injuries.13 In 2012, 5.1 percent of the burden of disease and injury worldwide (139 million disability-adjusted life-years) was attributable to alcohol consumption.
-Globally, alcohol misuse was the fifth leading risk factor for premature death and disability in 2010. Among people between the ages of 15 and 49, it is the first.14 In the age group 20–39 years, approximately 25 percent of the total deaths are alcohol attributable.
-More than 10 percent of U.S. children live with a parent with alcohol problems, according to a 2012 study.

I also heard a stat that the majority of alcoholic suicides occur when the victim is sober. The alcohol didn't get them, but the alcoholism did. Going by my own observation, that seems about right.

Statistics didn't get me sober nor do they keep me sober. I consider them all irrelevant- because I know I'm a straight up alcoholic and that's the end of that.

I've noticed plenty of people who don't drink, drink little, leave drinks unfinished, etc, since I got sober. Maybe their hearts or whatever benefit, maybe not - but not drinking or drinking less can only be good for anyone, because alcohol is a toxin, a poison, a whatever. Again, that's their biz.

Probably a good idea to talk with your husband about what addiction IS and ISN'T - there was a good article on here about that recently- check that section (it usually shows up on the right side of the page for me).

I also think hot yoga 6 times a week is better for me - anyone, ha- than a couple of drinks a few times a week. Just sayin'.