Thee late stage alcoholics best friend: vodka
Thee late stage alcoholics best friend: vodka
Saw this in a comment by someone, sorry I didn't keep the poster's name.
But it just made me think this morning, just how far down the drunk's rabbit hole I have gone, and how far could be to go.
For whatever reason, over the past 4-5 months vodka became my choice poison. Of course the cheapest, plastic bottle vodka I could get. If I take a step back and think about that it gives me chills. It's like a junkie mainlining - there is nothing pleasurable about the taste of Georgi vodka, its passable motor oil. It's disgusting. It's not a fine Scotch or a full bodied Malbec - those are of for non-drunks.
No, I wanted and craved and gave in and tortured my being with pure **** vodka. As early in the day as I could towards the end.
I'm sure other late stagers got into different choices - but for me, reading that line in another person's post, it's clear just how far down the line I allowed my demons to take me.
Thank you as always SR.
But it just made me think this morning, just how far down the drunk's rabbit hole I have gone, and how far could be to go.
For whatever reason, over the past 4-5 months vodka became my choice poison. Of course the cheapest, plastic bottle vodka I could get. If I take a step back and think about that it gives me chills. It's like a junkie mainlining - there is nothing pleasurable about the taste of Georgi vodka, its passable motor oil. It's disgusting. It's not a fine Scotch or a full bodied Malbec - those are of for non-drunks.
No, I wanted and craved and gave in and tortured my being with pure **** vodka. As early in the day as I could towards the end.
I'm sure other late stagers got into different choices - but for me, reading that line in another person's post, it's clear just how far down the line I allowed my demons to take me.
Thank you as always SR.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Geordie Land
Posts: 380
In the end I drank whisky, vodka, whatever was cheapest, even GIN!
The last month of drinking there, the binges were days and days long, day and night, with tiny breaks inbetween (not even enough time to get all of the alcohol out of my system). And the thought came to me, you are turning into the"end stage" of drinking. It scared the crip out of me.
Yep. demons always head down, never up .
You are doing great, been following your story, keep the faith
The last month of drinking there, the binges were days and days long, day and night, with tiny breaks inbetween (not even enough time to get all of the alcohol out of my system). And the thought came to me, you are turning into the"end stage" of drinking. It scared the crip out of me.
Yep. demons always head down, never up .
You are doing great, been following your story, keep the faith
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 150
Vodka was my last go-to drink as well. I put in about 2 years with whiskey almost daily. There was a romance to whiskey in my mind. I don't know how the hell people didn't smell it on me, or maybe they did. Maybe they assumed it was some strange cologne. I didn't like beer or wine, they made me too sleepy. The drink needed to be 40% abv or more. For some reason, that level seemed to produce just the right effect of waking me up while numbing me.
But I switched to vodka when I got a more square job. I figured it was harder to smell in closer quarters. It was also easier to sneak into work. It's clear, mixes with anything. And if anyone said anything about a smell, I could always say I had just used the hand sanitizer.
There are so many little pathetic moments when you're living that lifestyle. The moment waiting for the store to open in the morning, the moment when you make your little mix drink to sneak into work, the moment where you see the clerk for the second time that day because you need a couple of beers to get through the night that vodka produced.
Blech. At a certain point, you are living for the alcohol and not for yourself. It's like a parasite.
But I switched to vodka when I got a more square job. I figured it was harder to smell in closer quarters. It was also easier to sneak into work. It's clear, mixes with anything. And if anyone said anything about a smell, I could always say I had just used the hand sanitizer.
There are so many little pathetic moments when you're living that lifestyle. The moment waiting for the store to open in the morning, the moment when you make your little mix drink to sneak into work, the moment where you see the clerk for the second time that day because you need a couple of beers to get through the night that vodka produced.
Blech. At a certain point, you are living for the alcohol and not for yourself. It's like a parasite.
I was able to destroy my life using just cheap beer, just had to drink more and more of it towards the end. The ethanol contained in every kind of alcoholic drink is exactly the same, whether it's cheap or expensive.
I heard this recently:
Regrets are useful.....
for about one second. However long it takes to conclude "I'm never doing that again" and start working on your better future where you never do that again.
Keep rocking that sobriety LG. More discoveries await!
Regrets are useful.....
for about one second. However long it takes to conclude "I'm never doing that again" and start working on your better future where you never do that again.
Keep rocking that sobriety LG. More discoveries await!
Vodka was my last go-to drink as well. I put in about 2 years with whiskey almost daily. There was a romance to whiskey in my mind. I don't know how the hell people didn't smell it on me, or maybe they did. Maybe they assumed it was some strange cologne. I didn't like beer or wine, they made me too sleepy. The drink needed to be 40% abv or more. For some reason, that level seemed to produce just the right effect of waking me up while numbing me.
But I switched to vodka when I got a more square job. I figured it was harder to smell in closer quarters. It was also easier to sneak into work. It's clear, mixes with anything. And if anyone said anything about a smell, I could always say I had just used the hand sanitizer.
There are so many little pathetic moments when you're living that lifestyle. The moment waiting for the store to open in the morning, the moment when you make your little mix drink to sneak into work, the moment where you see the clerk for the second time that day because you need a couple of beers to get through the night that vodka produced.
Blech. At a certain point, you are living for the alcohol and not for yourself. It's like a parasite.
But I switched to vodka when I got a more square job. I figured it was harder to smell in closer quarters. It was also easier to sneak into work. It's clear, mixes with anything. And if anyone said anything about a smell, I could always say I had just used the hand sanitizer.
There are so many little pathetic moments when you're living that lifestyle. The moment waiting for the store to open in the morning, the moment when you make your little mix drink to sneak into work, the moment where you see the clerk for the second time that day because you need a couple of beers to get through the night that vodka produced.
Blech. At a certain point, you are living for the alcohol and not for yourself. It's like a parasite.
What foolishness. Not that I'm beating myself up today. Just looking at this course of suffering with open eyes.
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 150
I could have written this entire post myself. What I was just laughing at during a meeting is that I also switched to vodka for the same insane reason - people won't smell it on me!
What foolishness. Not that I'm beating myself up today. Just looking at this course of suffering with open eyes.
What foolishness. Not that I'm beating myself up today. Just looking at this course of suffering with open eyes.
A local judge was just discovered to be habitually drinking vodka in chambers. He seems to be a late stage alcoholic who's been hiding it for years. Now, I imagine he's going to have to step down from the bench. It's sad because he's a nice guy and really young. His problem is all over the front page of the local paper yesterday and today.
In my case, I actually drank semi-expensive vodka in the middle of my addiction, then managed to dial it back to mostly cheap beer during a year long, unconscious attempt at tapering. Eventually I was beer only, and then quit entirely. I'm not suggesting this as a successful method, I'm just pointing out that that is what my pattern was. They actually raised the price of "my" vodka, and I stopped buying it, which ended up being the start of my road to recovery, although at the time I was probably just aggravated that they raised the price by about 40 percent overnight.
In my case, I actually drank semi-expensive vodka in the middle of my addiction, then managed to dial it back to mostly cheap beer during a year long, unconscious attempt at tapering. Eventually I was beer only, and then quit entirely. I'm not suggesting this as a successful method, I'm just pointing out that that is what my pattern was. They actually raised the price of "my" vodka, and I stopped buying it, which ended up being the start of my road to recovery, although at the time I was probably just aggravated that they raised the price by about 40 percent overnight.
Early and middle of my drinking career, I drank the cheapest vodka I could find.
Then I decided to start buying the expensive vodka, 'cause I was worth it Talk about crazy alcoholic thinking!
In the end, cheap or expensive, my drinking was killing me.
Then I decided to start buying the expensive vodka, 'cause I was worth it Talk about crazy alcoholic thinking!
In the end, cheap or expensive, my drinking was killing me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 2,966
A local judge was just discovered to be habitually drinking vodka in chambers. He seems to be a late stage alcoholic who's been hiding it for years. Now, I imagine he's going to have to step down from the bench. It's sad because he's a nice guy and really young. His problem is all over the front page of the local paper yesterday and today.
In my case, I actually drank semi-expensive vodka in the middle of my addiction, then managed to dial it back to mostly cheap beer during a year long, unconscious attempt at tapering. Eventually I was beer only, and then quit entirely. I'm not suggesting this as a successful method, I'm just pointing out that that is what my pattern was. They actually raised the price of "my" vodka, and I stopped buying it, which ended up being the start of my road to recovery, although at the time I was probably just aggravated that they raised the price by about 40 percent overnight.
In my case, I actually drank semi-expensive vodka in the middle of my addiction, then managed to dial it back to mostly cheap beer during a year long, unconscious attempt at tapering. Eventually I was beer only, and then quit entirely. I'm not suggesting this as a successful method, I'm just pointing out that that is what my pattern was. They actually raised the price of "my" vodka, and I stopped buying it, which ended up being the start of my road to recovery, although at the time I was probably just aggravated that they raised the price by about 40 percent overnight.
I always had a stocked bar with expensive booze,but in my end days of drinking it was cheap plastic bottle vodka. I didn't want to 'waste' the good stuff on getting blackout drunk alone. Insanity!
That was me who wrote that original post-and lived it as I see many of you have. Nice to see I'm not alone, which I already actually knew because of many friends who did the same.
Plastic bottle warm straight. Then I'd add some water to it because I couldn't stand the stinking stuff.
I remember once drinking after it was in the glove box for five hours. in ninety degree weather straight out of the bottle. Real social drinking there.
It was cheap and the buzz was, too. Man, I hated that stuff. Never stopped me from drinking it, though. It brought the inevitable conclusion to my drinking career faster than beer. I will say that for i t
Plastic bottle warm straight. Then I'd add some water to it because I couldn't stand the stinking stuff.
I remember once drinking after it was in the glove box for five hours. in ninety degree weather straight out of the bottle. Real social drinking there.
It was cheap and the buzz was, too. Man, I hated that stuff. Never stopped me from drinking it, though. It brought the inevitable conclusion to my drinking career faster than beer. I will say that for i t
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