Readygo

I know it’s different for everyone but here’s my deal, my husband has also kind of given up alocohol, he decided to do a dry January when i said I was going to try to go without it for a bit. And I have gone days without an ounce of interest or thought that having a drink would be nice, my husband has also been surprised by how much he is liking the no alcohol living, then my husband (who I think is still trying to wrap his mind around me having any issue with alcohol and commiting to not having it) brought up if I went out with my girlfriends he’s sure I’d have a glass of wine with dinner and that it’d be okay to go “nuts” on a girls night out, or on our upcoming trip I can drink. I was like eh, no because I don’t want to return to wanting alcohol regularly. He totally understood that.... then bam! Wine does sound good, did I really just realize I will never drink wine. Ever. Again?! Can I do this??

I know I can and I know I really want to. But ugh, I guess it caught me out off guard. I didn’t think I’d have to revisit my stance to myself when I was feeling so good about it. This must be why you have to continually be recovering?

Rar

"I know I can and I know I really want to. But ugh, I guess it caught me out off guard. I didn’t think I’d have to revisit my stance to myself when I was feeling so good about it. This must be why you have to continually be recovering"

This is you AV (alcoholic voice) talking to you. Ignore it, beat it down.

Anna

Others are not usually able to understand alcoholism, so it's not surprising that your husband doesn't get it. The important thing is for you to focus on doing what you know you need to do.

Dee74

You'll get all manner of well meaning folk saying you can have a glass, or even a night of drinking, every so often...the reality of course is different for drinkers like us and we know that...

A lot of people have the idea that recovery means never thinking about drinking again. The reality for most of us is we will have thoughts about drinking again, however fleeting.

the strength of our recovery lies not in ever thinking those thoughts but doing the right thing in response if we do

I don't want it to sound like life is an endless litany of drinking thoughts either, Its not.

I started this journey with real physical gnawing cravings.

Over time they became mental thoughts, sometimes obsessions, then fleeting thoughts easily dismissed...

and now., I can't remember the last time I thought about drinking ...probably 4 years ago during the night when I was in constant nerve pain and even that idea looked foolish in the morning.

If I ever have the thought again, I know I'll respond the right way

D

time2shineagain

I'm only 25 days in, so it's very much one day at a time. The thought of a life without alcohol? Too overwhelming Bring yourself back in the present and focus on today. And if that gets too overwhelming, one HOUR at a time. You CAN do this!

Ken0331

Then don't think about it that way, silly.

Just admit your craving is there, and rather than "never again" tell yourself, "no, just not today. Who knows what tomorrow may bring, but I'm not going to drink today."

Many of us have stayed sober by focusing on just getting thru today.

Shebeens

My though exactly - “no wine ever”?! I know I can’t drink one... so none needs to be the answer. My very good friend I rarely see texted yesterday and said she bought a beach house and can’t wait to sit on the deck, drinking cocktails with me. I didn’t tell her ....

wildflower70

I have tried over the past 5 years to rationalize my drinking. I would quit for months and feel better, have 1 glass of wine, the next day a bottle, by the weekend 2 bottles (a night), by the end of the weekend full blown cravings to drink daily. It always started with 1 glass, and ended with me posting here crying out for help. I'm tired of doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results. My last drunk wasn't awful, it wasn't fun either, it was just a waste of precious time, and I still ended up here crying out for help to stop the insanity.

I don't know where you are on your journey, if your tired of the insanity, best to quit now while your ahead of the game. I wasted 5 years doing "research" (moderation) and I'm right back where I started. You will know when the game is over, hopefully sooner than later. Best wishes