My drinking is out of control... just off a 7 day bender, want to quit
 

Hello everyone,

I am new here and have never posted to a forum but I feel like I need some support to get me out of this. I am considering AA but I am nervous to go, I don't know what to expect.

I feel so alone, I am in my late 20s and people don't understand because social life revolves around drinking especial at this age. They think I can control my drinking if I really want to, go out socially and stop once I am drunk. I can't.

I just finished another 7 day bender (after almost 6 weeks of sobriety), I did many things I am not proud of, one being losing ANOTHER job and falling down a huge flight of stairs which resulted in multiple bruises and cuts. I could of snapped my neck! I lost my last job during a 6 day bender a few months ago.

Once I start I cannot stop, all logical thought is gone. I don't even think it is NOT NORMAL to be taking vodka nip shots in a parking lot at 11am. My personality completely changes when drunk.

I think because I do not fit the profile of that people think an alcoholic is from what society portrays that they don't believe me, and encourage me to drink.

I feel so alone. I know if I go down this path any longer, something horrible will happen. I have lost so much and I desperately want to stop and I try but always end up drinking thinking this will be the time I can control it.

Any advice on steps I can take to recovery or any support is much appreciated.

Thank you

Hi and welcome! I used to drink vodka at the gym before working out - somehow that seemed reasonable. TRUST me life is so much better once you get past that initial first week. But you have to do it. You probably should see your doc and get a few days of ativan as you are probably going to need it. Also hydration - tons of water and vitamins. And possibly rehab if you can swing it. Stay close to here and in a week you will be a different person. You can do it- I did and just hit 8 months. Take care.

Your situation is similar to mine.. Although my benders would only last 3 days as my stomach literally could not handle any more vodka. But my benders consisted of a 5th a day..

I go through bouts of sobriety as well, after a few weeks I think "hey why not? I can control this thing...." But inevitably I go back into the vicious cycle..

I've 1/2 hearted attempted to quit for good, but this time after becoming extremely sick my body just can't do it anymore. I'm on day 5, feeling better but the hardest times are now going to come, to keep abstaining.

It all comes down to how much do you want it. You can try AA meetings, keep away from triggers or situations that a result in consumption.. But there is no magic answer from my experience. See a doc, they may be able to prescribe meds to help ease the transition. Good luck.

Hi Jeppy,

I totally know the hell you are going though. I lived it myself. I went to a 30 day inpatient treatment center to dry out and detox because I just simply could not stop on my own. It was there that they spoon fed me AA and took me to meetings. It helped once I got out to have that foundation, and gave me the fortitude to go to meetings on my own once I got out. Not sure if that is a possible route you may be interested in taking. It has worked for me. I am coming up on 16 months sober.

It was terrifying to go to the meetings by myself at first. I would cry in the parking lot before dragging myself in there. However, I was so desperate to not go back to drinking and living the way that I was. I knew that I would surely die if I kept going down the path I was on. So I just found a meeting close to home, and kept showing up everyday. Too shy and too scared to talk to anyone. But something happened as I kept coming back... Some of them started talking to me instead, and cared about me and made me realize that I was not alone and they were like me. Slowly but surely I began to not feel so afraid anymore. I have found that life can be totally amazing as a young sober adult. I have great sober friends now, fellowship, peace, and most of all freedom from the grip that alcohol had on me. There is an answer, and I have found it in the rooms of AA. You can do it too ❤️

Welcome! You never have to do this again. I have always checked in the 24 hour recovery connection thread to remind me of who I am and I can't drink.

Ahhhh, the ol' next time will be different lie.
I fell for it many times myself.
Too many times.
It was never different.
It's never going to be different.
The alcoholic living in my head is a known liar.
I stopped taking advice from a known liar and my life got a lot better.
I highly recommend it.
:ring

Hi and welcome Jeppy :)

My advice is to read around, look at what others are doing to stay sober, ask questions and find your own way :)

there's tons of support here - we're here for you :)

D

Welcome! You can find answers and support here :)

Welcome Jeppy. You are never alone on SR. Please read and post often. You will feel stronger after reading and posting. There are many, many years of collective wisdom and experience. You can do this! You never have to feel this way again.