atheistdrunk

(This is my third time trying to write this. Hopefully I don't get interrupted again)

Hello all,

A bit of background on me. I have a history of anxiety and depression stemming from a car accident that left most of my family injured, myself included, (mentally and/or physically) and the driver that hit us dead.

I struggled for a while in college and ended up dropping out due to a severe bout of depression. I tried looking for work to no avail. Apparently you need experience to gain experience (oh, the irony).

I eventually moved back home where I joined the workforce at one of my uncles' businesses. Things were going well; I made friends, joined a band, and even performed a few gigs. That all stopped when I hurt myself on the job (reoccurring injury from the accident). Treatment for pain wasn't working and I fell into a deep depression with myself ending up checking into a hospital for suicidal thoughts.

The depression eased and I ended up seeking alternative therapy in the form of craniosacral therapy and acupuncture (paid for by my aunt and uncle; I love them). I returned to worked and ended up getting a promotion. I was obviously thrilled. Then I got my girlfriend pregnant.

Determined to not be the deadbeat/absent dad that is so prominent in my country's society, I ended up moving in with her. I don't know why but shortly after my daughter was born I started drinking. It gradually went from weekends to everyday and the amount I drank also increased. My girlfriend told me I drank too much and I joked saying "I'm a drunk; alcoholics go to meetings" (woe to me).

It took me nearly two years to admit that I have a problem and that I'm an alcoholic. I admitted it to my immediate family whom were supportive. My father joined AA years ago and urged me to attend some meetings and I obliged.

I went for quite some time but never got anything out of it. I'm an atheist and a cynic so the whole "giving yourself to a higher power" never resonated with me. I started seeing a therapist that suggested I join he government funded outpatient program (she didn't know much about it). I went and it was basically church mixed with AA. Needless to say I could not relate.

So, here I am today, at the end of a two week vacation that was supposed to be a detox period, drinking a pint of rum. Admittedly, I have gone from an every day drinker to drinking every few days.

So, after all this, is there any hope for an atheist alcoholic?

AAPJ

My sponsor is an atheist. I gave him his five year chip a couple of weeks ago. So it is possible.

You are not alone. https://secularaa.org/meetings/

Rodney18

I would say absolutely
The rehab I went to had different types of meetings-secular and non.
Higher power was explained to me as something that can be anything- nature, religion, spirituality ... anything, even a part of oneself
My best friend is an atheist and he’s been off of coke for 15 years now and he had a hell of a time getting off of it-but he did
I attend AA but not regularly- I think it’s helpful for me, but my family and home was my recovery
So yeah, there’s much hope- just as much as for anyone
Recovery is about you- however you deal with it
That’s just one ol’ boys “two cent’s worth”.

atheistdrunk

I guess I should have explained. I live in the Bahamas. A heavily religious country, but also heavily alcoholic. The joke is that for every church there are 2 bars/alcohol shops,

least

Welcome! We have a forum for secular recovery. You might like it.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...r-connections/

And yes, I believe you can find permanent sobriety without a belief in a higher power.

Done4today

Welcome Atheistdrunk,

At my home group there are two guys that have 20 plus years of sobriety and they are atheist.

AA works if you believe in God.
AA works if you don't believe in God.
AA doesn't work if you believe you are God.

Good luck buddy.

biminiblue

Bahamas! Ya, man.

You live in beauty.

If you can look out over the ocean and not see that something is more powerful than you...like someone here says, try stopping the sun from rising. Try it. Try to stop a hurricane.

I don't know what's out there. No one knows. I do know that I am not the supreme being.

That's a good place to start, yeah?

Welcome to the forums. You'll find stuff here that resonates, absolutely.

There is a whole secular forum here, too! Lots of great folks over there, take a lookie:

Secular Forums Sober Recovery

andyh

definitely. there are plenty of atheists, me included, on the forum enjoying recovery. have a look at the link that "least" posted. there are several secular programs with no "spiritual" requirements. some have online meetings available if you don't have face-to-face meetings locally.

atheistdrunk

I wish I could do that without the fear of being mugged. I used to walk up and down the street I lived off of until somebody stopped me with a knife. Luckily I had mace so I sprayed and ran for my life. I live in a dangerous place.

atheistdrunk

Thank you all. I will check out the secular link.

Anna

Welcome!

I think if you focus on stopping drinking and recovering, you'll be fine. And, when you look around SR, you will find lots of people with lots of different ideas about recovery. Just do whatever works for you.

Gottalife

There is always hope as long as you are still breathing and have not crossed into wetbrain.

What will work for you will depend on the extent of the problem. So far you found self reliance didn't work, so you went to AA where your father and other alcoholics had recovered. However, you could not swallow the medicine, so you went back to self reliance and are now drinking again.

Good suggestion above about taking a look at the secular forum. There are techniques you can try, and the big plan concept is interesting. As I understand that, you make a decision to never drink again, and never change your mind. Straight forward enough except for the fact that with alcoholism as I have experienced it, I always changed my mind - for insane reasons.

I tried a few different things, and had a few things tried on me. At Times I was very open minded and willing, but nothing really took until I became convinced of what the problem really was, and that I had run out of options.

Nowsthetime

Hello!

I’m one!

I use AVRT, SR and a plan.

There’s hope for everyone and lots of support in this community.

Hope to see your around.

MindfulMan

AA isn't the only road. Although you might not have a lot of choices for recovery groups where you are, there are Smart Recovery (and AA) online meetings. AA didn't resonate with me, and neither did the Higher Power, but I've known some great people with years of sobriety that go mostly to agnostic meetings. There's a guy named Spiritual Al that I love and he is a huge proponent of the AAA meetings.

Again, you can probably do some of these on-line.

Making a commitment to sobriety, admitting that you need help and realizing that you can't control everything in your life, especially drinking, is a great start.

Welcome.

dwtbd

Billions of people on the planet don’t drink, I’m sure millions of them are at least agnostic

Whether you are devout or atheist has no bearing on being able to remain abstinent.

You do see you are using G-d as a reason to have more drinks, yeah?

trachemys

I once heard GOD described as Gang Of Drunks.

I guess if you need a higher power bad enough, we are it.

Dee74

Like others have said - thats no impediment to getting sober - even AA has atheists in it

You are very welcome here in the Newcomers forum. and you may find one or both of these other forums here useful

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...r-connections/
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...step-recovery/

icoi87

I don’t have any suggestions to add besides the ones that have been mentioned, but wanted to tell you that we are here for you, and I absolutely believe you can do it.

Ghoster18

Hi
I play drums
I've been in some cool bands over the years
A lot of my fav bAnds include recovery messages in their songs.
Empowerment is my way to success
Because lack of power is my dilemma!

Atheism is still a belief system
How well does it serve you
Does it uplift and empower you
If it does then use it help you recover
If it doesn't serve your greatest and highest good.
Then I suggest you go find a belief system or path to walk that will give you what your addiction is giving you but without the disempowerment.
Good luck.
My angle of attack on this thing is
I am in the driving seat
I am one of billions on this planet
I feel good when I take care of myself
When I am there for someone in need
All addiction is fake
I'm not a fake
I have a heart
My son needs a sober mature healthy dad!!
That's my responsibility to deliver that relationship to him!
I'm no use to anyone when I'm wasted.
I don't do labels myself
Spiritual
Atheist
Agnostic
Etc
Pointless
I just get on with it in a way that works for me.
Labels are self limiting
I sit by the ocean
Groove with other musicians in rehearsals or gigs or the studio
I run
I mountain bike
I'm grateful!
Get after it in a way that ignites your fire
You cannot fail if you are sincere in your commitment to change.
G

vikingtwin

I don't describe myself as atheist, but I'm certainly not religious. I just believe my higher power is an awesome presence in the universe, and my expectations are, that this coming March 2nd, I'll be celebrating 40 years of continuous sobriety from alcohol & mood altering chemicals.

I loved what Done4Today posted earlier in this thread:

AA works if you believe in God.
AA works if you don't believe in God.
AA doesn't work if you believe you are God.

It sums it all up.