2muchpain

I got it Stewy. I think most people that have followed your posts get it. You have very serious problems no doubt about it. Besides posting how tough life is for you, what are you willing to do change things? Maybe it's time to man up, take the bull by the horns and grab hold of your future. No offense man, but maybe it's time to quit blaming your drinking problems on your life's situations. The only one responsible for your life is you. Your ex or your parents have nothing to do with it. You drink because you want to drink. It's that simple. If you are really interested in quitting drinking, than you will do what you need to to quit drinking. Go to rehab or a detox center, whatever. Just get serious. John

Dee74

Hi Stewy

I think Nons made a great point - this is not something thats happening to you - its something you're doing to yourself.

You're expending great amounts of energy every day buying booze and then trying to hide that you've been buying booze.

There's other action you need to be taking.

Some people join AA or other meeting based groups - others go to inpatiient or outpatient rehab

You're in real danger of losing yourself forever - you know I'm not being melodramatic.

Your daughter needs a dad, Stew.

If you absolutely cannot stop yourself from buying booze tomorrow I think that something else - whether it be AA etc or rehab - must be a serious next step for you?

D

Stew1984

Everyone is right. I have not been taking any of this seriously and it’s at the point and has been before that I must cease this behaviour right now with immediate effect. I am fortunate enough to have family around me and good friends, my job, food, and a home. I am very sorry if I have offended anyone in the past here and come off as ungrateful / selfish / childish / whatever else. I’m not drinking tonight, or tomorrow night or any other night or day for that matter. My problems are only enhanced by the booze, everything I have going on will be manageable without booze and I am going to beat this now.
By giving this my full undivided attention and focus, I trust in myself and my own ability to get out of this mess. This stuff is filth, poison and has no place in my life. Thank you everyone for the support.
The difference now needs to be my mindset, I’ve got a battle on, I know that. But it’s one well worth doing as everything is at stake

Hevyn

We'll always be with you, Stewy. You sound disgusted with what's happened, and ready to do it this time. We know you can.

saoutchik

If you have tried on your own and it hasn't worked then I guess rehab seems sensible in that light. Hopefully you will be able to see an addiction counsellor who might in turn be able to point you towards some medical help (under a Doctor's supervision of course) Wanting to quit and not being able to, I know that feeling bit if you are resolved to quit enough to get help then that help in turn boosts your resolve. I think "a virtuous circle" is the jargon.

Readygo

I was like that too with the cycle and not even liking myself about it. Finally it took me being so fed up with the guilt that the bad feelings towards it out weighed the fear of being without alcohol.

I hope you can get to the point of seriousness and being so fed up with the cycle! Good luck and keep posting! It’s a life saver! Even if it’s to say why you’re second questing quitting

Stew1984

I’m in bed now but because I spent most of the afternoon asleep I can’t get to sleep so I’m sat here reflecting on the situation. I’m angry with this now, and that is the springboard for me to get as far away from booze as possible. The anger is there and I’m keeping it front and centre every day to spur me on. It’s time. No more silly excuses, nonsense thinking that this is just normality to be poisoning myself day after day. How unbelievably selfish have I been to indulge in such pointless wastes of time over the last few months.
I’ve got all kinds of weird pains in my upper body and it’s frustrating not being able to sleep. May just get up for a bit

Verdantia

Hey, Stew. I needed inpatient rehab to treat my alcoholism. It was a time to work on myself without the distractions of everyday life, in a structured environment.
Taking B vitamins (particularly thiamine) helped me a lot during withdrawals, since alcohol depletes them from our bodies.
I'm so glad you realize your problems are only enhanced by booze; there is no situation which drinking will not make infinitely worse. I wish you much peace and strength on your sober journey.