I don't think I can do it alone - (literally)

Old 01-14-2018, 05:41 AM
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I don't think I can do it alone - (literally)

Hey guys!

Well, this is just a little bit of what's currently going on. I live very far away from my home country (moved this year), I have a good job, I've taken over my life... and well, there's alcohol.

I have known that I'm an alcoholic long time ago (binge drinker type). And I have been able to stop for a month, a couple of months, but I'm in my late 20's and living in a city where everything revolves around alcohol.

My biggest problem I'd say I'm very lonely, and while I am able to not drink, it is very hard to come back home and have no one waiting for you (which in my case are my parents), who I can talk with and know they care about me.

I'm actually thinking of moving back because of this issue. Alcohol 's a huge problem and it has destroyed me in so many ways. Now obviously I'm not making up excuses to drink, that's totally on me, however, it's way easier if you have close support when you're recovering you know...

Anyway my two cents.
Hope1989 is offline  
Old 01-14-2018, 06:02 AM
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
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There is a lot of support here, and people share about all kinds of recovery plans- some of which are "just" using SR/online support either out of necessity or choice.

IME moving didn't get me sober. I had to decide I wanted that more than drinking, before I finally quit. In AA moving would be called a "geographical cure" in the list of things alcoholics try (no morning drinking, just drinking outside home or only at home, just beer not liquor, on and on) to no avail unless they accepted the basic fact that they could not drink no matter what.

Sounds like you know you need to quit - my best to you- hope to see you here.
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Old 01-14-2018, 12:36 PM
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Hi there. My job has made me move 4 times in the last 4 years. Sometimes I don't get to live with my husband and family. For me, it is depressing when I'm alone, but my absolute worst drinking has been when I'm with my husband. I often wondered why this is the case. I don't have the answer to your question, just my experience.
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Old 01-14-2018, 12:45 PM
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Location: England
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Welcome!!! I too feel very lonely a lot of the time. I live alone and it is never pleasant coming home to an empty house. I was drinking in an attempt to lessen the loneliness... which of course didn't work and just gave me a whole load of other stuff to deal with.

Keep close to these forums. That's where I went wrong last time. I thought I was cured and didn't need help anymore. I was wrong!
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Old 01-14-2018, 11:05 PM
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Hi Hope1989

I think it's something you need to put a good deal of thought into...I got sober in the same empty house I drank in, so its possible to do that - I leaned a lot on this community too.

If you really feel that moving back in with your folks will help, that's your call.

I'm thinking tho maybe it might also be a good thing, no matter what you decide, to think a little on why you're lonely.

I was always looking for someone to fix me - I thought if only I had a significant other, I wouldn't drink so much...

and that was true when I did get a girlfriend...for a while.

Over time tho, problems worries and arguments meant I ended up back at my usual level of drinking before too long and that ended that relationship.

I then did the exact same thing again 18 months later (different gf).

What really changed my life was getting into recovery.

I was forced to spend time with was terrifying at first and uncomfortable but I got into it.

I fixed what I could about me, and accepted the rest
I grew comfortable with who I was.

That had a great effect on my relationships - not only the romantic ones but friendships too.

I no longer needed anyone to complete me - I was already complete,...and that made the difference

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Old 01-14-2018, 11:14 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2016
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I think Dee's post is so true - i am also very lonely but I live with a significant other and children - it really is about caring and loving yourself.
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Old 01-14-2018, 11:40 PM
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Location: UK
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When i first got sober I felt lonely even when surrounded by friends or family as I didn't really feel like I could be completely honest with them. Then I found this place and AA where I could be completely honest. In AA it felt really strange actually, to be in a room of other people who not only thought and had acted like me around alcohol, but in some many other ways that I'd always felt that i was probably just a bit odd for. Like they all managed to get in my head somehow. But comforting, and i definitely didn't feel lonely in there! Why nit give some meetings a go?

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