Shans6
 

My husband is a alcoholic and addict,he left me and our 2 daughter's ages 7 and 13 9 months ago,I have filed for divorce a month ago,he moved 6 hours away for a job and has wiped his hands clean of us and it's hard to wrap my head around being abandoned,he drinks constantly and goes out drinking,he has not yet started supervised visits he was ordered to almost a month ago,he does not talk to me at all,he's just started a brand new life somewhere else,we've been married 13 years and he's been to 3 drug and alcohol programs during our marriage,so a lot of bad times,I would appreciate any advice and encouragement...Thank You

Hi Shans,

I am sorry for what brought you here to us but know you will get a lot of support here.

My suggestion:
As harad as it may be....
Focus on YOU
The kids
being Happy

Forget him, if he doesn't want to be in your life or the kids, it is probably a good thing. If he is in active addiction, would you really want that around your children? I know I wouldn't.

Please also understand, this has NOTHING to do with you. This is all HIM, he is the one who is an addict and chose that life for his family. This is not your fault, you are not making him drink or do drugs.
I hope someday he will wake up and make amends to you and the children.

Blessings,

Thanks,I know it's the right thing,guess I just get insecure knowing he's with someone else,I'm sure she's just like him...why else would he be with her? I just get sad sometimes

Him not trying should make it easier for you to have a full exit.

Thank goodness he's a functioning alcoholic meaning he works a great paying job so I'll have peace of mind knowing when he is ordered to pay support in March then he won't have all his pay being spent on his addictions and paying for his girlfriend's also.. maybe that will be hard for him... it'll put a damper on his selfish lifestyle

Hi Shans: I'm not well-equipped to provide advice to you in your situation, other than to suggest that Al-Anon can be really beneficial for someone in your position. I'd also strongly recommend that you re-post this thread in the friends and family forum, where you will find there are a lot of people who have had similar experiences. Here is a link: https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ly-alcoholics/. Good luck to you! I am sending you my support!

I'm so sorry for whats brought you here Shan but this is a place of great support and hope. Welcome :)

D