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On a very long road

Old 01-02-2018, 12:33 AM
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On a very long road

Right here it goes a long story compressed as short as possible + I am now 45 male a Roofer who has been off work due to health / addiction issues for a good while.
I was a heavy drinker for years over 20 + also into drugs but the so called designer ie amphetamines, Ecstasy, cocaine, acid, ketamine, used to go out clubbing on the English Dance scene in the late 1980s early 1990s
As the years progressed my drinking got worse Heavier out every night after work our all weekends none stop Friday afternoon till midnight Sunday then work at 6am Monday did it for years now I look back how in the hell did I do it also doing drugs as well
Relationships with family & different girlfriends suffered obviously I was selfish & self centred choosing to go out with my mates over anyone else
When the year 2000 arrived I was a mess it had caught up with me only I could not see it everyone else could so I carried on regardless I lost friends who died from drink & drugs but carried on in the summer my boss who was also a good friend said I've got to let you go for your own safety you need help sort yourself out then comeback so I lost my job
I had been drinking before work but just to stop.the DT's it levelled me out I had been a highly functioning Alcoholic for months but I didn't know it
So my drinking carried on finally in September 2001 I went into a Detox unit but lasted a week would not admit my alcohol problems would not say I was an alcoholic so left at that time my body was in pain from work related damage I was prescribed Tramadol 1st of another problem anyhow I calmed down a bit as they had given me librium in there an detoxed me so I drank less for awhile but soon was back to it
By Christmas 2000 I was worse in February 2001 I was back in detox the nurse who came & got me said if I hadn't been basically been dragged in I wouldn't have seen my birthday in April I was 8 & half stone in a real bad way this time I admitted I was powerless to alcohol & I admitted I was an alcoholic I stayed for a month got well then came out did good went back to work but I had been put on Anti depressants & Diazepam ie valium plus my tramadol to also temazepam/ nitrezepam so I came out on loads of Benzodiazepines which at that time I wasn't clued up on again I fell of the wagon after 8 months but not bad for someone like me this cycle went on for years in & out of Detox also did 2 Rehabs
Then finally on 23rd july 2007 at 2pm I had my last drink of vodka that was at home I had finally had enough I finally stopped days months went by then a year I had done it been sober ever since except for 3 falling off the wagon but each 1 only lasted for 2 days but they are only blips
I found out in January 2015 that I have Cirrhosis of my liver which knocked me for six but I suppose it's to be expected I have nerve damage in my legs due to drinking on morphine due to pain also still on tramadol it's the addiction to tramadol that worrys me I live in England what help is there for Prescription Addiction sorry if I waffled on 😊😊👍👍
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Old 01-02-2018, 12:36 AM
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Sorry to hear what brought you here, sounds like a tough set of circumstances. The good bit is, you ARE here and it's the best place you could have found
You are also, one step ahead of those who aren't even trying yet, so be proud of that too!
Happy New Year and
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Old 01-02-2018, 12:56 AM
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Hi and welcome Cakespectre999
Sorry about your health issues, but I'm glad you found us - welcome

D
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Old 01-02-2018, 01:12 AM
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Sorry for what brings you here, but glad you found us.

Well, AA and NA are both options.
Funny, I met a guy in the rooms who was from London but likes to drive out to other meetings as well. He was a scaffolders as well. Saw another young bloke die who was working for him when he fell off intoxicated. As the boss on that job he carried a lot of guilt about that for many years for plenty of reasons. Another scaffolders I know in the rooms always says how dangerous that trade is for being with others who drink and drug hard - just part of the culture he reckons. He's 6 years sober and drug free now.

You know, drug addiction is drug addiction, prescribed or not. Legal or illegal. Once you're using it differently than the script advises, then it isnt as prescribed any more really.

Why not look into AA and NA meetings in your area and give a variety of meetings for both fellowships a go (there will be some meetings that you like, and some that you don't so much). You'll also get to know others who've walked this path ahead of you who can offer their experience, strength and hope while you go about getting some of your own build up.

UKNA | Narcotics Anonymous in the UK
https://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk

Is it worth talking to your GP about the possibility of another rehab to get the ball rolling. Perhaps this time, with more at stake you will be ready to really engage with it, make it stick, and carry on the recovery work afterwards. That is key. So many people think of rehab as somewhere to go and get cured, but that's not the case. We all need to keep using those recovery tools we learn. If we don't use 'em we lose 'em. Like you say. It is a long road (hopefully). It goes on til we die. It's just a different road. One where we learn to deal with life as it is. And one where we start to learn to appreciate the view of the moment rather than sitting there like and aggitated and impatient child asking "are we there yet?" Until we finally get to glimpse the sea (and then we're bored and discontented with that as well in 5 minutes flat). Anyway. You're obviously talking to your GP anyway, with your liver and all. It might be time to get brutally honest about your addictions so you can find out what they can arrange for you.

I know in the states there tend to be more Sally Army facilities as well, but there isn't so much of that here. This might be an exception And worth a phone call ... https://www.salvationarmy.org.uk/glo...-house-swindon

Hope you stick around here as well, and keep reading and posting.

BB
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Old 01-02-2018, 01:45 AM
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I'm sorry, I don't advice to give you but I want to wish you a warm welcome to SR. I'm sure there will be lots of useful advice for you on this forum. Gabe x
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Old 01-02-2018, 09:27 AM
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Thanks for the welcome

Originally Posted by Zanna View Post
Sorry to hear what brought you here, sounds like a tough set of circumstances. The good bit is, you ARE here and it's the best place you could have found
You are also, one step ahead of those who aren't even trying yet, so be proud of that too!
Happy New Year and
Happy New year to you to & Thanks 😊😊
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Old 01-02-2018, 09:28 AM
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Thanks for the welcome

Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
Hi and welcome Cakespectre999
Sorry about your health issues, but I'm glad you found us - welcome

D
Thanks for the welcome
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Old 01-02-2018, 09:36 AM
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Welcome and I'm glad you found us.

Staying sober will be the best thing you can do for your health and your life.
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