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Honestly, I think I should leave...

Old 12-29-2017, 03:20 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Wildflower, I understand that you're frustrated you are not sober and many of us here are sober.

I started off in the Women's Forum and stayed there for quite awhile before I ventured into other forums. I focused on what I could learn from members I admired and that always lead me in the direction I wanted to go in.
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Old 12-29-2017, 03:32 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by wildflower70 View Post
Dee, You have been nothing but kind and welcoming..Thank you. I only think of leaving because I'm not on the same page. I'm not SOBER!! I'm still in the darkness, and I don't want to bring anyone down. And when I am sober, I'm not in the "clique". I never feel "good enough"here...doesn't that mean it's time to do something different?
With kindness and love..WF
The whole idea of SR is to help people who aren't sober get sober

I never feel "good enough"here...doesn't that mean it's time to do something different?
Well, I never felt good enough anywhere - which is one of the reasons I drank.
Is it possible you're really frustrated, even embarrassed, with yourself?

The solution to that is to not walk away from the only support you have...the solution is to continue trying to get sober

Ultimately it's up to you. I couldn't stop someone else from leaving recently and I'm realistic enough to know I won;t be able to stop you either.

If walking away from SR gets you sober then great - but that that hasn't been the case when you've left other times, has it?

I really genuinely don't think SR is the problem here. I really hope you reconsider.

whats your recovery action plan right now? what are you doing to stay sober?

I'm not asking this to put you on the spot or embarrass you - I'm asking so that the great resource of SR can help at least have the best plan possible if you do decide to elave

D
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Old 12-29-2017, 03:59 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
Now is when you need to be here even more than ever Wildflower. Being sober is not a requirement to post here, and there is no "time limit". We would hope that you want to get sober....but even that is not a requirement to be here. I hope you stay.
Scott,

You seem knowledgeable and helpful. I know that my relapsing over and over pisses people off. And, I know that it makes me less desirable to be in the group. How do I get into your"group", if I'm still struggling?.
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:06 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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It doesn't **** us off, wildflower.

I think this is all your mind playing tricks on you.

I know when I was drinking I was pretty sure I knew what other people were thinking. It's one of the cruel jokes alcohol plays on us - it tried to make me afraid of everyone and feel less than.

Then other times I felt like I was better than everyone.

Someone in an AA meeting said, "I can go from Emperor to flea in two seconds flat." That was me, too. Roller coaster of delusions.
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:08 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
The whole idea of SR is to help people who aren't sober get sober



Well, I never felt good enough anywhere - which is one of the reasons I drank.
Is it possible you're really frustrated, even embarrassed, with yourself?

The solution to that is to not walk away from the only support you have...the solution is to continue trying to get sober

Ultimately it's up to you. I couldn't stop someone else from leaving recently and I'm realistic enough to know I won;t be able to stop you either.

If walking away from SR gets you sober then great - but that that hasn't been the case when you've left other times, has it?

I really genuinely don't think SR is the problem here. I really hope you reconsider.

whats your recovery action plan right now? what are you doing to stay sober?

I'm not asking this to put you on the spot or embarrass you - I'm asking so that the great resource of SR can help at least have the best plan possible if you do decide to elave

D
OMG..Dee, I am so far from being in my right mind..I honestly only wanted to leave because I don't feel worthy of you guys. You are all sober and happy. The last thing you need is a drunk, dragging you down...
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:19 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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"You are all sober and happy."

I must ask:

Where/how did you get that impression?
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:23 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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If I had left here when I was still drinking, I wouldn't be sober today. I stayed and let people help me and I got sober. And I was a chronic relapser. So you see, there is hope.
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:26 PM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by columbus View Post
"You are all sober and happy."

I must ask:

Where/how did you get that impression?
Look at all of the threads in the AM..
Count the days sober
Windy Town
We just like to count our days sober
On and on...great! But what do people hold onto that aren't yet sober???
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:37 PM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by wildflower70 View Post
Look at all of the threads in the AM..
Count the days sober
Windy Town
We just like to count our days sober
On and on...great! But what do people hold onto that aren't yet sober???
But look at all the Day 1 again posts too... God knows I've had my fair share of them ... Hell, I only have 13 days now... so I may very well have to post "day one again" at some point. I hope not, but if I do and when I have I have gotten a lot of support and some "tough love" on here too. I needed BOTH to move forward. Understanding that hey it happens, this is some hard &@!# we are trying to do... but also examining what can I do and what changes can I make so it doesnt happen again. Please dont leave Wildflower.... The support here is part of the reason I've got 13 days 😚😚
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:40 PM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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If you want to be where you perceive others to be you need to take the first step, happiness comes from within and takes work... You are worth the life you want to live and the person you want to be. It is a long journey and like any journey it requires the first step to be taken...
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:41 PM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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"But what do people hold onto that aren't yet sober??? "

The support, advice, understanding and hope that is offered here to those who are suffering.

Have you checked out the threads of those who are suffering?
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:41 PM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by wildflower70 View Post
Look at all of the threads in the AM..
Count the days sober
Windy Town
We just like to count our days sober
On and on...great! But what do people hold onto that aren't yet sober???
I just hold onto the day. I make each day count. I hold onto the friendly encouragement I get from the people I have opened myself up to these past years on SR. I hold onto the belief that everyday I am getting better and better with the help of SR.I hold on because I get stronger in doing so.
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:44 PM
  # 33 (permalink)  
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But what do people hold onto that aren't yet sober???
I held on to Hope.
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:48 PM
  # 34 (permalink)  
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Ok guys....here I am
I'm far from perfect
I'm not yet completely sober
I want to be here
Am I still welcome?
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:48 PM
  # 35 (permalink)  
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Join the December class wildflower! Thereís lots of support among us just starting out or trying to start. I did the same thing for a while. Iím only on day 12, but I felt the exact same as you. It actually helped me before I committed to quitting to read about the others struggling just like me. I think the monthly classes offers more for us just starting out.
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Old 12-29-2017, 04:53 PM
  # 36 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by wildflower70 View Post
I want to be here
THIS is what matters!!!
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Old 12-29-2017, 05:00 PM
  # 37 (permalink)  
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Of course you are welcome here! As they say in AA - we don't shoot our wounded.
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Old 12-29-2017, 05:04 PM
  # 38 (permalink)  
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Omigosh, wildflower.
Are you not seeing the “Slipped/relapsed/back to day one” posts?
This time of year is HARD for us: sober and in recovery, sober not in recovery, not sober, loves someone who is not sober, want to be sober but can’t stop.
You name it.
I don’t care if you have one day or ten years.
This is an awful time of year for the struggling.
I have been on this site daily for a while now, and the only time I have observed eyerolls at someone who is drinking is if the drinker gets nasty or belligerent.
I mean, this is why we are here.
To share our experience, strength and hope to, hopefully, help others.
Everyone walks their own path, and for some relapse is part of that path.
You want to step away from SR for a bit?
That’s fine, though, imo, you need the site badly right now.
But don’t write off your potential to get and stay sober.
We stop when we are finally, irrevocably, absolutely ready to stop.
Peace.
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Old 12-29-2017, 05:05 PM
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Agree with Magpie.
Join the December class.
Tons of support in the classes.
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Old 12-29-2017, 05:06 PM
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Good. Glad you are here.
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