My friends second and. Current wife are going away for Christmas
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,423
Originally Posted by JustTony 
Hi Sweeti,
You're right - there are better offers out there for you. Your number one offer is from someone called Sweetichick. She desperately wants you to fall in love with her again and take care of her.
Wishing you strength.
Tony
You're right - there are better offers out there for you. Your number one offer is from someone called Sweetichick. She desperately wants you to fall in love with her again and take care of her.
Wishing you strength.
Tony
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,040
Hi Sweetichick,
Is there the possibility of going to inpatient? It will give you some space, and help you get a solid recovery time under you.
The back and forth with your neighbor is definitely not healthy. Have you considered moving somewhere else? I know you own your home, but moving may be something you want to consider at some point.
You can do this, and sobriety is worth it.
Is there the possibility of going to inpatient? It will give you some space, and help you get a solid recovery time under you.
The back and forth with your neighbor is definitely not healthy. Have you considered moving somewhere else? I know you own your home, but moving may be something you want to consider at some point.
You can do this, and sobriety is worth it.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
I bought the book when love is a lie and realised I was so dumb.. I am a shriveling wreck. Im lucky if I cry every 2 years. Why was I so dumb. I would shoot myself if I had a gun. I can't move my parents won't sign. I can't afford rehab. And everything I sent him last night he totally ignored. What is the purpose of life
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
I can't help you anymore with the relationship thing.
To be honest I really think it's a huge and toxic distraction from what you need to be focusing on - your recovery.
I really think you need to start doing a couple of things - post here when you're not drinking and two - make a list of all the things you could do for your recovery, from posting here and right up...even the things like rehab.
When you get rid of the things you can't or won't do that's your list - if there's nothing left on your page you're going to have to widen your parameters a bit.
2018 could be more of the same or the year you reclaim your life.
I really think and hope you should go for option B sweetichick
D
To be honest I really think it's a huge and toxic distraction from what you need to be focusing on - your recovery.
I really think you need to start doing a couple of things - post here when you're not drinking and two - make a list of all the things you could do for your recovery, from posting here and right up...even the things like rehab.
When you get rid of the things you can't or won't do that's your list - if there's nothing left on your page you're going to have to widen your parameters a bit.
2018 could be more of the same or the year you reclaim your life.
I really think and hope you should go for option B sweetichick
D
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
If you're feeling really low sweetichick here's some Aussie numbers to call:
Lifeline
24 hr counselling. All Issues.
Phone: 13 11 14 (cost of local call from landline)
Lifeline Australia - Home
Crisis Chat - Lifeline
https://www.lifeline.org.au/Find-Hel...es/crisis-chat
This service is available 8pm - midnight 7 days a week
(EST 1 April - 4 October)
(EDT 5 October - 31 March)
If the service appears 'offline' or 'busy', please call Lifeline on 13 11 14.
Suicide Call Back Service
Phone: 1300 659 467
Seven days a week 24/7
https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/
beyondblue Support Service
Support. Advice. Action 1300 22 4636
chat online at
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/
https://www.counsellingonline.org.au/
Free drug & alcohol counselling 24/7
D
Lifeline
24 hr counselling. All Issues.
Phone: 13 11 14 (cost of local call from landline)
Lifeline Australia - Home
Crisis Chat - Lifeline
https://www.lifeline.org.au/Find-Hel...es/crisis-chat
This service is available 8pm - midnight 7 days a week
(EST 1 April - 4 October)
(EDT 5 October - 31 March)
If the service appears 'offline' or 'busy', please call Lifeline on 13 11 14.
Suicide Call Back Service
Phone: 1300 659 467
Seven days a week 24/7
https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/
beyondblue Support Service
Support. Advice. Action 1300 22 4636
chat online at
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/
https://www.counsellingonline.org.au/
Free drug & alcohol counselling 24/7
D
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Originally Posted by sweetichick
I am a shriveling wreck.
What are you going to do today to move away from being a shriveling wreck and become the person you dream of being?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Out in the Stix of Southern Indiana
Posts: 2,784
I would say that pretty much your whole problem is alcohol and drugs. I had to plan a day to quit. Every day leading up to that day I thought about how much I hated being so messed up and how great it was going to be when I didn't have to do it anymore. It has become even better than I could have imagined! It was very tough for a while but it got easier and easier. Nothing is going to change unless you change it. Please consider joining us.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 545
It seems you value your relationship with this married man more than you value your sobriety and yourself. I know because I have been there. I can tell you with all certainty you cannot have both. You have to choose. Right now this guy is winning. And you are allowing it.
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: Indiana
Posts: 105
Sweetichick
Taking your life isn’t worth it you deserve a happy ending we all do but only you can do that let the good people in your life and the bad people out of your life you control how hard or how easy your sobriety will be I recently found out it takes more energy to make it bad then what it would to make things easy make today a new chapter in your journey and make it a good one my opinion put relationship on the back burner get into recovery then later on down the road look for a nice man to see you for who you really are and treats you the way you deserve to be treated best wishes
Taking your life isn’t worth it you deserve a happy ending we all do but only you can do that let the good people in your life and the bad people out of your life you control how hard or how easy your sobriety will be I recently found out it takes more energy to make it bad then what it would to make things easy make today a new chapter in your journey and make it a good one my opinion put relationship on the back burner get into recovery then later on down the road look for a nice man to see you for who you really are and treats you the way you deserve to be treated best wishes
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Derbyshire Dales, UK.
Posts: 2,618
Sweetichick - The guy has gone away for Christmas, the guy isn't answering your calls/texts or whatever - Sweetheart, he is NOT that into you.
I can only imagine how downtrodden he's managed to get you - he sounds like a classic narcissist and trust me, I've been there and ate the damned t-shirt.
It's so difficult when you own your house, but please, please stop drinking - put your house up for rent and earn some money over and above what the rent on your new place would be.
There ARE solutions sweetie, but you need to start listening and trusting us.
I honestly feel for you and am not saying this for any other reason than concern. We have tried SO hard, but it's like you have a brick wall between us and you reading and really thinking....thinking sober...about what we're saying.
What can we do to get through to you love, because I for one am at a loss.
Come on girl - tell us what we can do?
Z.
I can only imagine how downtrodden he's managed to get you - he sounds like a classic narcissist and trust me, I've been there and ate the damned t-shirt.
It's so difficult when you own your house, but please, please stop drinking - put your house up for rent and earn some money over and above what the rent on your new place would be.
There ARE solutions sweetie, but you need to start listening and trusting us.
I honestly feel for you and am not saying this for any other reason than concern. We have tried SO hard, but it's like you have a brick wall between us and you reading and really thinking....thinking sober...about what we're saying.
What can we do to get through to you love, because I for one am at a loss.
Come on girl - tell us what we can do?
Z.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,492
The Salvation Army offers free rehab for anyone who wants it. It's there for the taking:
http://satruck.org/national-rehabilitation
This link is specific to Australia:
https://salvos.org.au/need-help/addi...tment-options/
http://satruck.org/national-rehabilitation
This link is specific to Australia:
https://salvos.org.au/need-help/addi...tment-options/
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,040
Hi Sweetichick,
Have you called any of the numbers Dee or Anna have posted? Also, think about renting out your house, that is a solution to get you away from the environment you are stuck in, and you can also get a little extra money to help you rent a less expensive place. Would your parents be okay with that? I know your relationship with them is rocky.
Think about the Salvation Army rehab, it may be just what you need.
Have you called any of the numbers Dee or Anna have posted? Also, think about renting out your house, that is a solution to get you away from the environment you are stuck in, and you can also get a little extra money to help you rent a less expensive place. Would your parents be okay with that? I know your relationship with them is rocky.
Think about the Salvation Army rehab, it may be just what you need.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,355
Why do you keep bothering yourself with him again? You are putting unnecessary energy into being mad at something you can not control and can not change due to it being in the past. This situation which should be behind you is causing you to drink? Stop bothering yourself with these neighbors, stop beating yourself up over the past, stop giving yourself the reason to drink over worrying about your neighbors wife... you cant change any of this and nor should you try. Its not your responsibility to fix your neighbors issues. Leave them behind you once and for all.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
Originally Posted by Zanna
Sweetichick - The guy has gone away for Christmas, the guy isn't answering your calls/texts or whatever - Sweetheart, he is NOT that into you.
I can only imagine how downtrodden he's managed to get you - he sounds like a classic narcissist and trust me, I've been there and ate the damned t-shirt.
It's so difficult when you own your house, but please, please stop drinking - put your house up for rent and earn some money over and above what the rent on your new place would be.
There ARE solutions sweetie, but you need to start listening and trusting us.
I honestly feel for you and am not saying this for any other reason than concern. We have tried SO hard, but it's like you have a brick wall between us and you reading and really thinking....thinking sober...about what we're saying.
What can we do to get through to you love, because I for one am at a loss.
Come on girl - tell us what we can do?
Z.
I can only imagine how downtrodden he's managed to get you - he sounds like a classic narcissist and trust me, I've been there and ate the damned t-shirt.
It's so difficult when you own your house, but please, please stop drinking - put your house up for rent and earn some money over and above what the rent on your new place would be.
There ARE solutions sweetie, but you need to start listening and trusting us.
I honestly feel for you and am not saying this for any other reason than concern. We have tried SO hard, but it's like you have a brick wall between us and you reading and really thinking....thinking sober...about what we're saying.
What can we do to get through to you love, because I for one am at a loss.
Come on girl - tell us what we can do?
Z.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
Originally Posted by Anna
The Salvation Army offers free rehab for anyone who wants it. It's there for the taking:
http://satruck.org/national-rehabilitation
This link is specific to Australia:
https://salvos.org.au/need-help/addi...tment-options/
http://satruck.org/national-rehabilitation
This link is specific to Australia:
https://salvos.org.au/need-help/addi...tment-options/
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
Originally Posted by Delilah1
Hi Sweetichick,
Have you called any of the numbers Dee or Anna have posted? Also, think about renting out your house, that is a solution to get you away from the environment you are stuck in, and you can also get a little extra money to help you rent a less expensive place. Would your parents be okay with that? I know your relationship with them is rocky.
Think about the Salvation Army rehab, it may be just what you need.
Have you called any of the numbers Dee or Anna have posted? Also, think about renting out your house, that is a solution to get you away from the environment you are stuck in, and you can also get a little extra money to help you rent a less expensive place. Would your parents be okay with that? I know your relationship with them is rocky.
Think about the Salvation Army rehab, it may be just what you need.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
Originally Posted by Countrylife
Sweetichick
Taking your life isn’t worth it you deserve a happy ending we all do but only you can do that let the good people in your life and the bad people out of your life you control how hard or how easy your sobriety will be I recently found out it takes more energy to make it bad then what it would to make things easy make today a new chapter in your journey and make it a good one my opinion put relationship on the back burner get into recovery then later on down the road look for a nice man to see you for who you really are and treats you the way you deserve to be treated best wishes
Taking your life isn’t worth it you deserve a happy ending we all do but only you can do that let the good people in your life and the bad people out of your life you control how hard or how easy your sobriety will be I recently found out it takes more energy to make it bad then what it would to make things easy make today a new chapter in your journey and make it a good one my opinion put relationship on the back burner get into recovery then later on down the road look for a nice man to see you for who you really are and treats you the way you deserve to be treated best wishes
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Derbyshire Dales, UK.
Posts: 2,618
Originally Posted by Zanna
Sweetichick - The guy has gone away for Christmas, the guy isn't answering your calls/texts or whatever - Sweetheart, he is NOT that into you.
I can only imagine how downtrodden he's managed to get you - he sounds like a classic narcissist and trust me, I've been there and ate the damned t-shirt.
It's so difficult when you own your house, but please, please stop drinking - put your house up for rent and earn some money over and above what the rent on your new place would be.
There ARE solutions sweetie, but you need to start listening and trusting us.
I honestly feel for you and am not saying this for any other reason than concern. We have tried SO hard, but it's like you have a brick wall between us and you reading and really thinking....thinking sober...about what we're saying.
What can we do to get through to you love, because I for one am at a loss.
Come on girl - tell us what we can do?
Z.
I can only imagine how downtrodden he's managed to get you - he sounds like a classic narcissist and trust me, I've been there and ate the damned t-shirt.
It's so difficult when you own your house, but please, please stop drinking - put your house up for rent and earn some money over and above what the rent on your new place would be.
There ARE solutions sweetie, but you need to start listening and trusting us.
I honestly feel for you and am not saying this for any other reason than concern. We have tried SO hard, but it's like you have a brick wall between us and you reading and really thinking....thinking sober...about what we're saying.
What can we do to get through to you love, because I for one am at a loss.
Come on girl - tell us what we can do?
Z.
SO happy that things are looking up for you
Hang in there Xx
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