starting over

Old 12-16-2017, 06:06 PM
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starting over

hello all,

I have been a member of this forum in the past but can't remember my user name, so I started a new account.

I have been trying to quit drinking for about 10 years now. I have had had periods of sobriety between a few months up to two years in that time. I have disposed of all the alcohol in the house. I want to quit cigarettes too. I don't want to be this sad person who sits alone in their house smoking and drinking and ruminating in a depressed fashion until the wee hours.

I don't have a job as I am in the process of selling my house and moving back home to take care of my unwell, elderly parents. I have had a lot of medical problems myself in the last few years and can't work at the moment even if I wanted to. So there is a lot of time to fill during the day right now.

I realised the other day that my relapse prevention strategy is basically "don't drink" which is about as effective as it sounds. So I need to work on this and also pay attention to what my triggers are. I am dreading Christmas as there will be booze on the table, but I think I will just say I am trying to diet and avoiding drinking calories and no one will think anything of it or probaby even notice. I need to have a strategy in place on the day.
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Old 12-16-2017, 06:54 PM
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Yep, never hurts to have a strategy, but as you said will probably go unnoticed.

Glad you're back and tweaking your plan a bit! Look forward to seeing you around and sharing your success in the new year.
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Old 12-16-2017, 07:11 PM
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Glad you came back! I hope you'll use the support here to get sober for good.
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Old 12-16-2017, 08:04 PM
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Welcome back!
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Old 12-16-2017, 08:17 PM
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Welcome back!! This is an incredible site, and it has helped me finally make sobriety stick.

Sounds like you have a lot going on right now, and this site is one great resource to help for support.

Here are two great links:

What is a Recovery Plan (What exactly is a recovery plan?)

Holiday Survival Guide
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Old 12-16-2017, 11:11 PM
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Welcome (back) Patch
I think a recovery action plan is a necessity.

Ten years is a long time. Sounds like you're ready to embrace change?

Even if you're unemployed, in indifferent health, somewhat housebound, and a carer for others, you can still be sober.

The support here is still the same as it ever was. Stick around a little

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Old 12-29-2017, 10:23 PM
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A lot has been happening and I don't know what to do. I put my house on the market, sold and gave away most of my possessions and prepared to move in with my parents who are elderly and inform and need more care.

Once I moved in, I discovered my mother has been witholding medical care from my father becuase she is embarassed to discuss his failing mental state with anyone. They refuse to do anything that might make things easier like apply for government assistance that is easily available to them in terms of getting safety rails installed in their home, assistance with gardening, repairs etc. My father won't even wear his hearing aid. My father has been violent and aggressive towards me and keeps asking me when I am leaving. The last straw was an axe left at the door of the room in which I was sleeping. I packed up and went back to my house, which I have to be out of in about three weeks.

I don't even WANT to stop drinking right now. I have explored options and gotten advice and it looks like my only option is to report my mother as adult protective services for neglect of my father as his carer. I am about to be houseless, I'm unemployed and in poor health myself. What a mess. I am still packing up my things. I rented a storage unit and can live in my camper van if I need to. I wish I was drunk.
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