I got drunk again. :-(
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 48
I got drunk again. :-(
I had a bad week and decided to get drunk. Why? I have a bad week. I'm taking med for my depression which works most of the time but when i need to escape I don't care anymore. I don't like this feeling when I drink, can anyone tell me what to do when **** hit the fan in life?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,491
Hi and I'm sorry that you decided to drink. The thing to do when things are really hard is to remember that drinking is not an option, ever. Make a list of things you could do to distract yourself and to feel better. My list includes going for a long walk, listening to my favorite music, going out for coffee, calling someone and having a chat. Do whatever you think will work for you. It will get easier as time goes on.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 8,998
Man oh man, good job coming right back here and asking the good question. Well done.
Conventional wisdom here is to have a plan. I suppose that having different plans for when the AV gets going or when "happy hour" rolls around or in your case, when life goes sideways in a big way.
I think there are some templates for plans but I don't know if there is one that is specific to what you ask. Developing such plans must be pretty personal but probably have commonalities.
Irk, now I want to see yours or any one else's plan around this situation.
Conventional wisdom here is to have a plan. I suppose that having different plans for when the AV gets going or when "happy hour" rolls around or in your case, when life goes sideways in a big way.
I think there are some templates for plans but I don't know if there is one that is specific to what you ask. Developing such plans must be pretty personal but probably have commonalities.
Irk, now I want to see yours or any one else's plan around this situation.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
The key is to get some sober time under your belt. When we regularly drink, our baseline mood moves to below normal due to the long term effect of alcohol. So anything that comes up sets us off, because it seems too difficult to take. This is especially the case in early sobriety. In addition, our executive function (pre-frontal cortex) is also diminished, which often leads to "eff it, I'm gonna drink".
The solution to BOTH these problems is sober time. The longer we remain sober, especially past 30 days, the better our baseline mood will become, lifting of depression, etc. Six months will really solidify your sobriety. And also we regain some of the lost executive function, which helps us make better decisions and not cave so easily. Believe me when I say I speak from experience on this.
The solution to BOTH these problems is sober time. The longer we remain sober, especially past 30 days, the better our baseline mood will become, lifting of depression, etc. Six months will really solidify your sobriety. And also we regain some of the lost executive function, which helps us make better decisions and not cave so easily. Believe me when I say I speak from experience on this.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: Alabama
Posts: 1,284
Originally Posted by advbike 
The key is to get some sober time under your belt. When we regularly drink, our baseline mood moves to below normal due to the long term effect of alcohol. So anything that comes up sets us off, because it seems too difficult to take. This is especially the case in early sobriety. In addition, our executive function (pre-frontal cortex) is also diminished, which often leads to "eff it, I'm gonna drink".
The solution to BOTH these problems is sober time. The longer we remain sober, especially past 30 days, the better our baseline mood will become, lifting of depression, etc. Six months will really solidify your sobriety. And also we regain some of the lost executive function, which helps us make better decisions and not cave so easily. Believe me when I say I speak from experience on this.
The solution to BOTH these problems is sober time. The longer we remain sober, especially past 30 days, the better our baseline mood will become, lifting of depression, etc. Six months will really solidify your sobriety. And also we regain some of the lost executive function, which helps us make better decisions and not cave so easily. Believe me when I say I speak from experience on this.
Nothing worse than feeling of letting yourself and others down.Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 467
Originally Posted by advbike
The key is to get some sober time under your belt
I know how it sounds - it's frustrating because how are you supposed to get time under your belt when all you want to do is have a drink right!
I'm in earlyish sobriety and it's a fight!
The only advice I can give is carry on fighting and come to SR or do anything to distract yourself from taking that first drink, otherwise it will be a vicious circle of relapsing - I lived it for decades!
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,935
Welcome back WNNM.
I can't tell you what to do. I can tell what I did and what I witnessed others do.
I stayed close to SR early in my recovery. Make SR friends, read lots of post, post lots of post all to learn from others and do the same.
A recovery plan that fits one's particular needs works good for me. Big hefty recovery tool box helps me too.
You can recover. It's the first drink that gets us drunk, Pause before you pick up and reach out for help here instead of using.
I can't tell you what to do. I can tell what I did and what I witnessed others do.
I stayed close to SR early in my recovery. Make SR friends, read lots of post, post lots of post all to learn from others and do the same.
A recovery plan that fits one's particular needs works good for me. Big hefty recovery tool box helps me too.
You can recover. It's the first drink that gets us drunk, Pause before you pick up and reach out for help here instead of using.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 743
We don't drink because of bad weeks, we drink because we are alcoholics.
My philosophy is no weeks, just days and just one day at a time. Then when that bad day hits just start the day over. So I had a bad morning, maybe stop and a quick prayer and some lunch will turn it around.
To some extent we have to learn to sit with some of these bad feelings. They will be pass, be patient. Go to the serenity prayer, that should be the default. To continue to feel bad is a choice. How we feel about something after the initial response has passed is a choice. We can continue to feel miserable or try and look for a bright side. Its really up to us.
My philosophy is no weeks, just days and just one day at a time. Then when that bad day hits just start the day over. So I had a bad morning, maybe stop and a quick prayer and some lunch will turn it around.
To some extent we have to learn to sit with some of these bad feelings. They will be pass, be patient. Go to the serenity prayer, that should be the default. To continue to feel bad is a choice. How we feel about something after the initial response has passed is a choice. We can continue to feel miserable or try and look for a bright side. Its really up to us.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
There's nothing like having a bad while you are craving a drink, and that obsessive craving makes everything that much worse. But if you stop drinking for good, after a while the cravings start to go away and become more manageable. In a short time, cravings will be nothing more than noise in your head, and if you are anything like me, you will realize that much of your bad day is actually caused by alcohol. We can actually make our bad days better, but bad days are part of life. The drinking however, is under your control. Actually, it always was, but you got in the habit of dealing with your cravings by drinking, and eventually you underwent a physical change in your liver, which you didn't notice, because as your liver became accustomed to processing alcohol, you once again dealt with that by drinking.
But you can break the cycle. It's not easy, but when you do, drinking becomes a choice that is about the same amount of effort as the choice not to drink. You won't be out of the woods, because you are an alcoholic, and sadly that is never going to change, but keep on not drinking and the choice will become your default. Just don't think you are well enough to sneak one drink. That's not how your liver works. Active alcoholism will take over again and ruin what you gained.
And old timer in AA once claimed that if you go back to drinking after 6 months, at least you had 6 good months. I never bought that, however. Old timers, myself included, don't know everything, but it's been shown over and over again, right here in this forum, drinking takes you back to where you were, and I've heard it said that it gets even worse. I can't personally verify that, because I never went back to drinking, but it's such a universal phenomenon that I'll take other's word for it. What I have experienced in my early days is that alcoholism always gets worse, never better, and never easier to live with.
So much for the negativity. The good news is that sobriety isn't something I would trade for a million dollars. My life kept getting better, sometimes while I wasn't even watching, but every once in a while, I would stop and re access, and realize how much better things have gotten. None of this was instantaneous. Well, no some of it was, but much of it was gradual and imperceptible while it was happening.
Breaking the cycle is something you won't regret, and a year from now you will realize, that none of this was a sacrifice. You just got rid of a bunch of bad stuff, and that's not a sacrifice.
But you can break the cycle. It's not easy, but when you do, drinking becomes a choice that is about the same amount of effort as the choice not to drink. You won't be out of the woods, because you are an alcoholic, and sadly that is never going to change, but keep on not drinking and the choice will become your default. Just don't think you are well enough to sneak one drink. That's not how your liver works. Active alcoholism will take over again and ruin what you gained.
And old timer in AA once claimed that if you go back to drinking after 6 months, at least you had 6 good months. I never bought that, however. Old timers, myself included, don't know everything, but it's been shown over and over again, right here in this forum, drinking takes you back to where you were, and I've heard it said that it gets even worse. I can't personally verify that, because I never went back to drinking, but it's such a universal phenomenon that I'll take other's word for it. What I have experienced in my early days is that alcoholism always gets worse, never better, and never easier to live with.
So much for the negativity. The good news is that sobriety isn't something I would trade for a million dollars. My life kept getting better, sometimes while I wasn't even watching, but every once in a while, I would stop and re access, and realize how much better things have gotten. None of this was instantaneous. Well, no some of it was, but much of it was gradual and imperceptible while it was happening.
Breaking the cycle is something you won't regret, and a year from now you will realize, that none of this was a sacrifice. You just got rid of a bunch of bad stuff, and that's not a sacrifice.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
