Mackenzielee27

I got sober on my own. 4 years of drinking from noting til night, cocaine use, whatever else.. And I finally decided I wanted life. I wanted to live life only for myself. I got sober. I made it 27 months. And then I made a decision.. To have a beer with a friend at lunch. It went good. I didn't need need more. I went to a co-workers 21st bday party and had a few. Went to work felt fine. A bit of anxiety but I new it would pass.. Then I felt great for a few days once the drinking guilt passes. Then I went out with a guy. Had a few. Then we hung again had a few. Then again. Had a few. I never feel like I need it. But today I was feeling so tired and ****** I opened a few.. I know I can get back on track and I know I have limits. The difference from this time from every other time.. Is I CARE ABOUT MYSELF FINALLY. But I need support. So I'm reaching out.

least

Welcome to the family. I hope you'll make use of the awesome support here to get sober for good and have the life you deserve.

Horn95

It is a very slippery slope.

Verdantia

Complacency has been a huge nemesis in my recovery. I start to think that I've got it, that I can drink like 'normals.' I can't. I am an alcoholic. If I drink I am going to die, and I nearly did the last go-round. I am so glad you are reaching out for support, Mackenzielee--you have definitely come to the right place. SR has been of immense help in my sobriety and I hope you stick around.

Dee74

Welcome Mackenzielee27
This is a place of great support and good ideas - I think you'll like it here

D

Hevyn

Welcome to a friendly & encouraging place, Mackenzie. Same thing happened to me every single time I tried to be a social drinker. Took me decades to realize it was never going to be possible. I did so much damage & caused needless pain by insisting I was in control. I'm glad you're realizing what needs to happen. We're so glad you joined us.

Anna

Welcome!

I tried to prove to myself that I could moderate and manage my drinking. Of course, I couldn't and it was exhausting to try...and fail.

You will find lots of support here!

leviathan

27 months is nothing to sneeze at. That should tell you about your ability to get back on the wagon.

Congrats on your 27. No one can take that away from you. Hope you find peace again soon.

JustTony

27 months is awesome.

I have so much to learn from you.

I hope I have so much support to give you in return.

JT

Stronger2017

Welcome to SR. I did something similar. It was fine for a while but then all the other stuff started to come back. I’m so glad I stopped again. Day 99 for me.

Red78

Trying to drink normally never seems to work.. It starts ok then slowly gets back to where you let off... I think that's the hardest thing, knowing that we can't have even one drink..

FreeOwl

I’m glad you reached out and I hope you choose sobriety and get to acting in support of that choIce immediately.

When I did exactly what you’ve done, those few led to a few more and a few more and within a short space I was on a wild binge that lasted a year and a half and nearly cost me everything.

I hope you don’t go there.

Trust me, sobriety is far, far better.

Arpeggioh

I had a lot of long, horrid relapses that started with "just this once," followed inevitably by "just once more..." And I never started afresh; stupid alcoholism progressed even when I wasn't drinking! Damn.

Lots of good support and good souls here; hang out with us! Welcome