What s weird feeling
 

I’m craving alcohol and at the same time repulsed by it.
Just today
Seems impossible but, well, there ya go ...

I felt conflicted for a while too. Wanted to drink but didn't want to drink. Fortunately, I finally came to the point where my desire to be sober was stronger than the desire to drink. :)

Yep, sounds like me every time I tried to get sober. My conflicted feeling go away at around 1-2 months and return again around 7-8 months.

The AV seems to go to sleep for awhile and then returns, when we least expect it. Think of all of the repulsive things about booze, the sickness, embarrassing moments, loosing family-friends-jobs-freedom, death.
There is no glamor in booze, only a slow agonizing end of the road.

You can do this!! :grouphug:

Yep
All of that
Not worth it