Agladney2313

Hello, my sister has been living on the streets for a year and a half addicted to meth and it's killing me my parents have tried to go down to where she's living 2 hours away and offer help but she's mad at them because they kicked her and her son out because she was stealing and acting crazy. Anyways they went down to try and get her to come home and get clean but she wanted no part of it and was yelling at my mom and even tried to pepper spray her.
Throughout this year and a half of her living on the streets she's had a phone off and on and we would talk. When I would call her or she called me she is always mad at my mom because she blames my mom since she's now lost her son but she's always emotional and sad when she talks to me.
Every time I talk to her I cry and ask her if I can help her and tell her that it makes me sad that people are hurting her and she starts to cry as well and tell me that she can't keep calling me if all I'm going to do is cry and make her cry.
So now it's been about a year since my parents last went down and tried to get her to come back home and it's weighing on me! I've tried going down to the city she lives in and find her but I wasn't successful.

I just heard from a friend that they seen my sister on the streets and she recognized them out her head down, starting crying and walked away. THIS KILLS ME!

She's gone to jail but for small stuff so nothing ever sticks, she's back out in no time.
She's gone from hanging out with pimps and drug dealers to now just hanging out with one girl selling her body and living in a hotel.

I'm scared of her but I want to help! My parents have found a gun in there house a year and half ago that wasn't hers, she's stole, lied, yelled but she's also gotten beaten up multiple times that I've FaceTimed her. She has gotten stitches on her face 3 times!
Recently over the past 3 months she is no longer on Facebook or calling. I know she's still alive because people occasionally see her and say so but I'm worried sick!!!

I feel like it's my responsibility to go down and find her since she's mad at my parents and literally hates them right now.

I want to help her but I'm afraid of her and I also don't really think she'll take my help but at the same time how do I let me sister die!
Please help I'm beyond sad and filled with pain.

Dee74

Hi and welcome Agladney.

I moved your thread to our main Newcomers Forum for more response


I'm sorry for what brings you here - I can't imagine what it's like to have a sister addicted and on the the streets, but I do know this is a great place for support and help.

Unfortunately I don't know of any easy solutions. Your sister need to make the choice to make changes in her life and turn things around.

I went down pretty low with alcohol - but I turned my life around...I'm hoping that she'll decide to do the same.

D

Seren

Hello Agladney, and welcome.

I am sorry for what brings you to this site, but I am glad you found us! So much strength and experience here.

I have several family members who struggle(d) with addiction, but the person who drove me to find SR was my stepson--an alcoholic, crack addict, heroin addict.

My stepson has been homeless, tasered by drug dealers, in prison, and in jail. He has totaled his car, has stolen from his late father, has threatened to kill 3 members of his own family.

And yet in his addicted brain, none of this is his fault.

While Mr. Seren was still alive, he tried several ways to help his son. Assisted in paying his deposit on an apartment, agreed to pay rent for 6 months as long as he stayed off drugs, kept a job, and stayed out of trouble with the law (he was arrested for drug possession and lost his job in one weekend). He agreed to pay for counseling, encouraged any sort of help the young man might need. All of it was refused--and yet we were always told that "no one will help me".

Well, to translate, no one will help him the way he wants to be helped.

• Don't hassle me about my drinking and drug use.
• Pay for my car, phone, and apartment.
• Do my laundry and cooking for me.
• Give me cash so I can impress my fake friends.

That was never going to happen, and so he railed against everyone and everything. I suspect the same for your sister. She probably hates her life and probably hates herself, and yet does not have the clarity to see that she is the only one who can turn this ship around.

Something worth repeating: She is the only one who can turn her ship around.

For those of us who love someone who is active in their addiction, letting them go to learn to live life on life's terms is just that simple, and yet just so hard.

I hope you will come back and keep reading about addiction. Learn all you can. Don't hesitate to tell your sister you love her...but you may need to limit contact for your own mental health.

Mizzuno

You have found a good place for support.

If you can, try to remember that your sister will need to come to the realization that she needs help on her own. The love you have for her will always be there and yes it is heartbreaking but she has to make her own decisions whether they're good or bad.

Have you looked into the friends and family section?

DangerZone

I have experience with meth. I used to be a user although I never did it a lot it completely screwed up my life... Very recently I quit so I can give advice.

Meth is a terrible drug. Probably one of the worst out there if not the worst in how it changes people. It can completely change a person into someone who they are not so please keep that in mind. Your sister has more than likely reached the stage where she is not even herself anymore.

You have to realize that until she wants to change there is nothing you are going to be able to do for her. You can't force a person to quit she has to want to do it for herself especially with a drug like meth. So until she reaches that stage you have to let her go.

That said meth isn't physically addicting so when she decides to quit she can do it with help. It's not like heroin where there is a strong physical withdraw which scares a lot of addicts from trying to quit even when they want to. It's all mental and the benefits of quitting meth are so huge it makes it very doable when compared to other hard drugs.

Not that it is easy especially if a user has been using for a long time. I hear with longtime users depression is going to happen sometimes for months due to a low level of dopamine but when she reaches that point when she is ready to quit get her professional help ASAP and she should be able to beat it.

Until she reaches that point I'd stay away. Talk to her but don't mention quitting just talk to her like you would anyone else. When she is ready she will let you know. Like I said you can't force someone to quit a drug like meth they have to want to do it on their own and frankly they are going to have to be determined because although I'd say it is easier than heroin it certainly isn't easy.

Hope your sister can beat this!