Susiegirl

It's my first strong craving since I started 20 days ago. AV has been talking to me for a few hours now and I just can't shake her off. Have a bit of a sore throat and one gland I think is swollen so perhaps that is what is making me tempted - A cold glass of white wine would go down lovely right now. Just come home after a 10 hour shift and not a lot of sleep last night but I managed to drive past the shop on the way home but it is only down the road.

ScottFromWI

Coming here to talk it through was a great idea Susiegirl. Yes - a cold class of wine would go down lovely wouldn't it? Until the second and third and 8th..and then the shame, guilt and hangover....

Thing is there is no such thing a "one glass"...it's always more than we intend and the results are always worse than intended.

Glad you made it by the shop...stick close to SR or any local support/help you might have. Maybe have a nice cool glass of water or some soup for the sore throat too?

joandmelandhan

Hey Susiegirl proud of you for grassing on the AV. I've had a few of those nights and its exactly when I draw on my list of emergency measures. I come here too.....
A few things that help me are:
Hot shower or bath
Eat something quick!
A nice big pint of lovely cold water
Vigorous housework (my cravings hit when I'm angry so this one is good!)
Get on the laptop somewhere nice and comfy and stick to SR or YouTube a documentary or even online Christmas shopping?
Have a cry
Call my mum or sister
Play Candy Crush (lol)
Walk/run round the block a couple of times
Pluck my eyebrows or have a facial
Get ready for bed
Go to bed with herbal tea and cake
Drink more water
Etc etc......
Remember the HALT triggers and I just know you'll get through it Susie! Just dig that 10% deeper tonight and picture waking up on day 21! You won't regret it Susie I promise you.
Lots of love and I'll be around all evening if you need a bit of support xxx

mrrryahj

I have a strong suspicion you can make it through this today. You came here instead of the liquor store, that's HUGE.

It takes a long time for us to retrain our brains and get rid of bad habits which we've been so accustomed to.

I think I am almost exact sobriety time as you and I called my dealer the night before last, placed an order. Then cancelled the order and blocked his number Then called my sponsor. Made it through and I'm SO happy I'm not a nervous shameful wreck for drinking/using.

You got this girl!

theVman31

Hoping you shake off the AV.
Never forget why you (we) are here.
Your AV wants you to feel and feed it.
So stay close to SR.

Give us an Update ?

Take care.
V.

Susiegirl

Phew !!! Sorry for the late reply - Thank you all all for getting back to me. I came home - put my PJ's on (so I would have to get dressed again to go back out) I have just eaten a home cooked meal and now sitting down with a mug of hot chocolate. The AV is finally getting quieter.

Scott - you are right I wouldn't have stopped at the one glass I would have drunk the bottle X

JO - U sweetie you have always have the right things to say as I wrote above I did do some of the things you suggested.

Mrrryahj - Why the 3 week stage? It's strange - I have been pretty good and managed to push AV away pretty quickly- I do not know what has come over me today - so glad you cancelled your order - Well done to you !

Vman - thank you for enquiring about me.

I am feeling stronger than I was earlier -Going to have this hot chocolate and then going to have an early night and read a little in bed.
It is true - Log onto SR before you succumb and it can go away. If didn't have you all I would have definitely drunk tonight X

joandmelandhan

Great news Susie! Sometimes it's a sily little thing that can snap you out of it. Enjoy the rest of your lovely snuggly sober evening xxx

Susiegirl

Thank you JO - it doesn't help when your work colleagues are talking about the xmas do all day and talking about what they are going to drink X

biminiblue

Those same work colleagues are going to be nursing hangovers and worrying about what they did.

I don't know who came up with work Christmas parties, but they are never a good idea!

Well done. Food and jammies is always the right choice.

Susiegirl

Thank you bimini- my home is where I used to drink most alone however as soon as got home tonight I felt safe. I have a day off work tomorrow so hoping I will have a lovely good nights sleep and feel a lot better tomorrow X

biminiblue

I did most of my drinking alone at home in front of the computer or TV, too, but it's still my sanctuary. I'm safe here.

Doing those little self-care things for yourself is huge. Fresh clean sheets, fluffy blankie, some popcorn. Hot chocolate!

I hope you feel better.

Strugglingtoget

Susiegirl: WOW! Well done. You dealt another solid blow to AV!
What a great example: get a craving? Post about it and be reminded where it leads and how to ride it out!
Hopefully I will do the same and like you arrive safely on 21!
As I was a bar drinker, every once in a while my brain is envisioning me in a nice bar with a friend “having a few..” Ha! That’s how I know I am with the enemy. —- there is no such thing as “a few” when it comes to me. And then after what inevitably becomes a difficult night, I get to wake up disgustingly sick. Do I want to feel that bad again? Do I want to freaking VOLUNTEER to get cancer and to feel and look terrible?

Susiegirl

Hey Struggling - I can finally say (as I'm safely up in bed and its only 807pm) that I will be with you on Day 21 tomorrow. Yay!!! 3 weeks - can you believe it. It was a close call tonight though X

joandmelandhan

Yes I feel the same. What was once my prison of drinking has now become my safe place. I feel protected by my own environment where I can jump into my pjs whenever I like and just shut out the world if I need some peace.
Hurrah for fluffy blankets and hot chocolate!

JJ991

I've only just seen this susie. I am SO glad you got past it. Haven't I been banging on about the virtues of hot chocolate?

Seriously though, to post on here & get through it is just bloody great! Onwards!

Strugglingtoget

I am so with you SusieGirl. Just a short while ago my mind simply went to thinking about a particularly nice bar; its great martinis and all the "glamorous" people available there with my friends.
Out of the blue!!! and then when I think about all the "fun" they are about to have, I start feeling sorry for myself... ARGH!!!

Chuck39

This was a great post and learning lesson Susie, thanks for sharing. I had a week of AV nonsense and I was getting really irritated by it so had to be hyper vigilant with HALT. I went to bed very early most nights last week with a glass of milk and cake. Alcohol = zero, Sugar = ridiculous! But we didn't drink and that's the lesson. I have been thinking a lot about the remapping of neural pathways and how we are literally rewiring the brain and its pleasure center with sobriety. It is no easy task so pat yourself on the back for the hard work!

Dee74

Hope your sore throat is better Susie

D

Susiegirl

Thanks Dee but its worse today but perhaps this is why I have been feeling weaker these past few days. Will dose myself up and come back stronger.

Thank you everyone for your support X

StartingOverNW

Nice work making it through the cravings Susiegirl

I bet it felt good to wake up today and realize you had another day instead of having 0. I've woken up too many times with 0 days after having some time, and never want to feel that way again.