Dealing with no contact from ex
Member
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Wareham, Mass
Posts: 7,067
Hi, CCMT.
I think addicts just have to have someone in their orbit to:
Love at times, disparage at times, abuse, mentally and/or physically at times, let go, tug back, keep dangling...
You name it.
I don’t understand it, but I have been on this site long enough to recognize that keeping someone on the string is a trait shared by many addicts.
It isn’t personal. It’s what they do.
Be the change you want to see.
He can keep this dance going forever unless he latches on to someone else, or you stop accepting the behavior.
Good luck.
I think addicts just have to have someone in their orbit to:
Love at times, disparage at times, abuse, mentally and/or physically at times, let go, tug back, keep dangling...
You name it.
I don’t understand it, but I have been on this site long enough to recognize that keeping someone on the string is a trait shared by many addicts.
It isn’t personal. It’s what they do.
Be the change you want to see.
He can keep this dance going forever unless he latches on to someone else, or you stop accepting the behavior.
Good luck.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 27
Originally Posted by Nowsthetime 
Never believe what people say, only what they DO!
Drop him and run!!! The last 2 years weren’t for nothing. They are the experiences that happened that made you the amazing wonderful person that you are today. Don’t put up with all this. He is not ready to get well. He blames you for relapsing or for triggering? That is a big lie. Do not be manipulated any longer and cut this person out of your life. He has brought you nothing positive and he will not bring anything positive to you Or your children.
Be excited about the rest of your life without the Suffering and the terrible baggage.
You and your kids deserve it!
Drop him and run!!! The last 2 years weren’t for nothing. They are the experiences that happened that made you the amazing wonderful person that you are today. Don’t put up with all this. He is not ready to get well. He blames you for relapsing or for triggering? That is a big lie. Do not be manipulated any longer and cut this person out of your life. He has brought you nothing positive and he will not bring anything positive to you Or your children.
Be excited about the rest of your life without the Suffering and the terrible baggage.
You and your kids deserve it!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 27
Originally Posted by Maudcat
Hi, CCMT.
I think addicts just have to have someone in their orbit to:
Love at times, disparage at times, abuse, mentally and/or physically at times, let go, tug back, keep dangling...
You name it.
I don’t understand it, but I have been on this site long enough to recognize that keeping someone on the string is a trait shared by many addicts.
It isn’t personal. It’s what they do.
Be the change you want to see.
He can keep this dance going forever unless he latches on to someone else, or you stop accepting the behavior.
Good luck.
I think addicts just have to have someone in their orbit to:
Love at times, disparage at times, abuse, mentally and/or physically at times, let go, tug back, keep dangling...
You name it.
I don’t understand it, but I have been on this site long enough to recognize that keeping someone on the string is a trait shared by many addicts.
It isn’t personal. It’s what they do.
Be the change you want to see.
He can keep this dance going forever unless he latches on to someone else, or you stop accepting the behavior.
Good luck.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 27
Originally Posted by Nowsthetime
Never believe what people say, only what they DO!
Drop him and run!!! The last 2 years weren’t for nothing. They are the experiences that happened that made you the amazing wonderful person that you are today. Don’t put up with all this. He is not ready to get well. He blames you for relapsing or for triggering? That is a big lie. Do not be manipulated any longer and cut this person out of your life. He has brought you nothing positive and he will not bring anything positive to you Or your children.
Be excited about the rest of your life without the Suffering and the terrible baggage.
You and your kids deserve it!
Drop him and run!!! The last 2 years weren’t for nothing. They are the experiences that happened that made you the amazing wonderful person that you are today. Don’t put up with all this. He is not ready to get well. He blames you for relapsing or for triggering? That is a big lie. Do not be manipulated any longer and cut this person out of your life. He has brought you nothing positive and he will not bring anything positive to you Or your children.
Be excited about the rest of your life without the Suffering and the terrible baggage.
You and your kids deserve it!
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