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Lost everything

Old 11-18-2017, 12:30 PM
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Lost everything

My partner of over 8 years has told me he's had enough & doesn't want me anymore, my drunken rages, fights, flirting with other men & my broken promises, he doesn't live me anymore, we were so in love that after only knowing him 4 months I gave my house & job up & moved me & my 2 children down south to live with him in his house, we both work, have a beautiful house & he's been a father to my 2 children & now I've lost everything, he's threatened it over & over again but always calms down & let's me away with whatever I've done the night before, this is different, 2 weeks on & hes adamant we r over, I'm heartbroken, had to go to the Dr's for counselling, beating myself up every minute of every day, why didn't I take heed, now it seems to late, thanks x

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Old 11-18-2017, 12:57 PM
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Welcome, and I'm sorry for your situation.

Hopefully this is a time when you make a decision to change your life and start to live a sober life. You'll find lots of support here.
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Old 11-18-2017, 01:06 PM
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Originally Posted by Anna View Post
Welcome, and I'm sorry for your situation.

Hopefully this is a time when you make a decision to change your life and start to live a sober life. You'll find lots of support here.
Thank you, if I'd done it sooner I might not have lost everything, I'm also waiting to see for counselling x
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Old 11-18-2017, 02:22 PM
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I had a lot of regrets too when I stopped drinking. Many of us do. All you can do at this point is to change your life moving forward. You can be the person you want to be.
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Old 11-18-2017, 02:51 PM
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Welcome to the family. I hope our support can help you get sober for good and turn your life around.
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Old 11-18-2017, 02:59 PM
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Hi, netta.
Welcome to SR.
Very sorry for your situation.
I hope you can find a way forward.
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Old 11-18-2017, 04:21 PM
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I'm sorry for what brings you here Netta but I know you'll find a lot of support here

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Old 11-18-2017, 05:02 PM
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Originally Posted by Netta7171 View Post
My partner of over 8 years has told me he's had enough & doesn't want me anymore, my drunken rages, fights, flirting with other men & my broken promises, he doesn't live me anymore, we were so in love that after only knowing him 4 months I gave my house & job up & moved me & my 2 children down south to live with him in his house, we both work, have a beautiful house & he's been a father to my 2 children & now I've lost everything, he's threatened it over & over again but always calms down & let's me away with whatever I've done the night before, this is different, 2 weeks on & hes adamant we r over, I'm heartbroken, had to go to the Dr's for counselling, beating myself up every minute of every day, why didn't I take heed, now it seems to late, thanks x
We all start with nothing, and we all end with nothing. In the middle we want everything! Not your fault, not anyones fault, it is as it is!
Still time will keep passing and you can decide how you wish to pass that time, dwelling in the past, or worrying about the future, whichever one you might choose neither one will treat you very well!
Or you can just be, tomorrow isn't here yet so the page has not been turned. To get a different result, you have to take a different action. Understand?

GL and wish you well!
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Old 11-18-2017, 05:10 PM
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Hi netta7171 welcome!
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Old 11-18-2017, 05:26 PM
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Welcome, Netta - I'm so sorry for the painful situation you're in. I'm glad you have decided to take care of yourself & break free of your dependency. This is a friendly and encouraging place - we will help.
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Old 11-19-2017, 04:21 AM
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Thank you everyone xx
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Old 11-19-2017, 04:36 AM
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Get sober, stay sober, take care of your side of the house and things WILL get better, probably in ways you can't even imagine now. Welcome to SR and good luck with things. Keep posting, we are here to listen and to help.
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Old 11-19-2017, 04:44 AM
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All your words of encouragement mean a lot when my world has fell apart, blood tests tomorrow & back to the Dr's on Thursday & cos I've been totally honest with my Dr social services will now be involved..but I knew that would be the case xx
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Old 11-19-2017, 06:43 AM
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We are here for you Netta. Pulling for you. You are taking the only steps that lead forward. Just stay the course. Things will get better, if you do.
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Old 11-19-2017, 07:24 AM
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Originally Posted by BixBees505 View Post
We are here for you Netta. Pulling for you. You are taking the only steps that lead forward. Just stay the course. Things will get better, if you do.
Been out for a walk with my 10 year old son & our dog, blue skies & autumn leaves, then I come back into our home, & it kicks me in the guts because I threw it all away cos of drinking
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Old 11-19-2017, 07:30 AM
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Focus on taking the next right steps...only that. Let go of engineering the outcome...and let go of beating yourself up for the past, too...the present moment, today, is the only space/place/base on which we can act. Stay present. Breathe. Do the next right thing.

Hugs and support. We know this is rough.
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Old 11-19-2017, 07:40 AM
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Originally Posted by BixBees505 View Post
Focus on taking the next right steps...only that. Let go of engineering the outcome...and let go of beating yourself up for the past, too...the present moment, today, is the only space/place/base on which we can act. Stay present. Breathe. Do the next right thing.

Hugs and support. We know this is rough.
Thank you, I don't feel as alone when I read theseposts x
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Old 11-19-2017, 07:45 AM
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Sorry for the situation you're in ut glad you've found us and seem to be ready to take this as a wake-up call.

Actually, you have not lost everything (yet!). You still have your children - please take heed now and do what you can to keep them with you and be the mum you know they deserve. I have too many freinds in recovery who have been through the pain of being seperated from their children. Social Services will want to help, but if they think you're putting your kids in danger by continuing to drink then they may well consider you a risk rather than responsible.

Is there any chance of you getting to some AA meetings - maybe in the week while the kids are at school. Plenty of places have lunch time meetings. Getting sober doesn't need to be a lonely business - there will be plenty of folk local to you ahead of you on the path to recovery who would be only to happy to support and guide you along the path, as we are here. You can't beat having some local sobriety pals to call and meet for a cuppa and a natter though.

Take care missus.
BB
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Old 11-19-2017, 08:00 AM
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Funny how quitting the booze now seems the least of my worries, cos of my actions I'm going to lose our home, sooner or later as it belongs to my partner or ex partner, I've got myself into thousands of pounds worth of debt, I can't move out cos basically we wouldn't be able to afford the basics, I've not had to pay household bills for 8 years, he paid all the bills & I've still managed to get into debt, the future certainly looks bleak....
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Old 11-19-2017, 08:02 AM
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I could see peace instead of this
 
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Welcome, Netta!

We all get wake-up calls until we finally pay attention and put some work into changing our course. This is a great place to find information and support to help you with that.

As already suggested, life really can be better than you can even imagine right now; it just takes some time and effort.
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