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-   -   Bad sponsor experience? (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/418733-bad-sponsor-experience.html)

anxiousrock 11-10-2017 05:14 PM

Bad sponsor experience?
 
I’ve emailed my sponsor a couple times to ask for help and ideas for when I go away this weekend and I haven’t heard from her.
I leave at 6am and I feel like I don’t have any support.

least 11-10-2017 05:16 PM

Can you call? Might get a faster response with a call.

hellrzr 11-10-2017 05:31 PM

There are a ton of reasons they aren't answering your email at this time. I presume you are in a sponsorship line and go to meetings so call a couple of other people on your list! Your sponsor is there to help you go through the steps. That doesn't mean they will be at your beck and call. That's why you have a network of people to call when you need support or advice.

hellrzr 11-10-2017 05:34 PM

Also, post your questions here and folks will be more than happy to offer you advice and support!!!

The simple answer is don't drink and pray : )

Dee74 11-10-2017 05:38 PM

Hi Anarock - I agree with least a phone call might get more immediate results.

Does she know you're going away this weekend?

I'd also re-read the threads of advice you've gotten here. It's not like there's been a dearth of input :)

D

andyh 11-10-2017 06:11 PM


Originally Posted by hellrzr (Post 6668526)
The simple answer is don't drink and pray : )

in case you pray for the wrong thing?

anxiousrock 11-10-2017 06:34 PM

I don’t have anyone else and I don’t have their number, it’s only email.

I’ve been having some issues with weight gain as well.
I’m not healthy enough to be gaining weight and since I stopped drinking I’ve just started eating. I don’t know which is worse, both can kill me.
I’m just feeling horrible, like I can’t win.

hellrzr 11-10-2017 07:47 PM

You should have your sponsor's phone number and you should have other numbers from people who attend the regular meetings that you do and from other in your sponsorship line, or "pigeons" as they are often refereed to.

Your sponsor should have you doing this anyway but a thing that is often encouraged is calling 2-4 other alcoholics everyday. Just to say hi and wish them a good day. A lot of times people don't answer the phone so you leave a nice message. It makes you and them feel better knowing you aren't alone. That action also makes the phone a whole light lighter to pick up when you need to call them for some advice or encouragement later down the road. Or if you call when your ass is falling off, another term you might hear a lot.

Here is something simple that my sponsor told me early on that I found useful. When you get a thought in your head about drinking, or really anything negative, say a simple prayer like "Please God, remove this thought from my head". Say is a few times and take a deep breath. If need be say it some more. Keep saying it until you feel better. It sounds weird and at first it might seem odd to do but I found it helpful for me. It really did help me take my mind off whatever was bothering me.

I certainly understand the over eating thing! But for now you might just want to take on one thing at a time. Overeating, especially sugar, is a common thing we do. Give it some time and things will come together for you!

Dee74 11-10-2017 08:01 PM

Hi Anarock

it's perfectly normal to eat a little more when quitting drinking - maybe try and gravitate to healthy meals - lots of vegetables and salads, not too many carbs, while you're away?

Smaller portions and healthy snacking can help too.

I know you said internet may be spotty but what about going around and printing off things you find useful on SR - like the cravings link or the action plan links that I'll post again below - that way you can have them there to refer to?

The more preparation you do the stronger you'll get and the less chance the AV will have of beating you down.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-cravings.html

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html

Don't talk yourself into a relapse - you can remain sober - give yourself every chance in the world to do that :)

D


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