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coming out and staying sober

Old 11-10-2017, 12:43 PM
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coming out and staying sober

Am About 2 years sober since touching drink or drugs
I just came out to my friends and family that i am transgender Female to male most of my friends have been very supporttive my husband is support and most of my family are the only person av not told is my mother who will never understand or accept that am male i know she will never call me by my male name and i know she will miss gender me as calling me she all the time years ago i would have drank because of this i would end up getting very drunk and self injuring or ODing ending up drunk in the ER ( A and E ) and making life hard to the drs and nurses there
I still self injure but since comeing out i havent self injured and i feel very happy at the moment despite what my mother thinks or will say
I havent shown eating disorder behavour in a few day and am relaxing at home listening to a gay radio station witch have old 70's 80's and 90's music and if i feel energetic ill dance
I see my DR on monday and am going to asking to see a gender threapist i also see my psych on the 24th of this month as well see what happens
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Old 11-10-2017, 01:35 PM
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Best to you for a sober and happy future lived to your potential. Count blessings in the people who support you.
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Old 11-10-2017, 01:38 PM
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It's really good to see you and to know that you are moving forward with your life. Good for you for taking the step to be true to who you are. You sound happier than you ever have DarkAsylum. And, I'm so glad you have a lot of support.

Not to worry about your mother. It sounds like she will not change, at least for now. Just focus on your husband and family.
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Old 11-11-2017, 06:00 PM
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Good to hear from you again DA

D
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Old 11-11-2017, 06:44 PM
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I'm so happy that you've not self harmed since coming out give it time regarding your mother.....you never know what the future holds

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Old 11-12-2017, 01:49 AM
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You do sound happy DA, that is great to hear. I cannot even imagine the challenge you are going through right now, it is tough in the best of circumstances but a very important step to finally be free to be yourself. I know my brother had a very difficult time coming out to my mother as a gay man and my mother is a lesbian! Of anyone she would surely understand being homosexual, but yet it was still a very hard thing for him to do. So, if you have someone like your mother who really does not understand I can imagine it is a million times more painful and difficult. I agree with Anna though, for now I would not even worry about that. Right now you just worry about your, your work with your psychologist and gender therapist and your relationship with your husband.

Now you are finally blossoming into your true self, do not let anything cloud your brain as you finally become free. I hope your psychologist can help you with your eating disorder and self-harm as well as your alcoholism.

Sending you warm thoughts.
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Old 11-12-2017, 03:34 AM
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Hi DA. Congratulations on your sober time and on your coming out.
When you say that your mother will not refer to you by your gender, do you mean deliberately or accidentally? Excuse me if that is a clumsy question, but let me explain. I work at a school where we have a transgender (male to female) student. I taught her when she was younger, when she still identified as a boy. Now that she identifies as a girl, I find it extremely difficult to get her gender correct in normal conversation. I don't do it deliberately, it is just really difficult and I am mortified when I get it wrong. Her own mother does it, too, despite being 100% supportive.
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Old 11-12-2017, 03:41 AM
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Great stuff on not self harming DA and glad things are moving in a good direction
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Old 11-12-2017, 05:46 AM
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You do sound much happier and excited for the future Alex

So happy for you. . . I've been making some movement towards finding
parts of my true self as well of late, and it really is liberating, isn't it?



Wishing you the very best
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Old 11-12-2017, 12:22 PM
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Congrats to you and for your courage. Best wishes!
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Old 11-12-2017, 02:35 PM
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thank you all for replying to me and your support
my mother would deliberately call me female i changed my name 10 years ago to a female name and she deliberately call me by my birthday name i know i need to change it again but at the time i was too scared to tell anyone about me wanting to be male i change my name to a male name after new year i am feeling very positive at the moment
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