9 Days Sober

Old 11-06-2017, 08:12 AM
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9 Days Sober

Not really sure where to start. I was a daily drinker, usually vodka or wine. I would start around 2pm most days (I work from home) and it was rarely a problem. My wife also likes to drink (wine only), but doesn't seem to have a problem abstaining.

My drinking has gotten me into a few problems, but nothing that I couldn't fix. I've tried getting sober before (out patient and AA) but I'd be sober for months at a time and just get back in to having a few drinks.

Last week, I was traveling for work. I went to the hotel bar after my flight and I was roofied (FYI, I'm a guy). I woke up on the floor of my hotel room 13 hours later, with my wallet missing and having missed a meeting. I had to fly home that day which took 5 hours and I was sick the whole time (20+ years of drinking on the regular and never sick once). I proceeded to throw up for 12 hours straight the next day.

I haven't had a drink since then and while the itch is there, this time is different. I feel REALLY good. I have tons of energy and I feel GOOD. I wake up early, I go to sleep without a problem (was an issue the first few days) and I have an appetite. I work out on the regular (power lifting) and am doing even more now.

I'm not going to AA. I've tried it in the past and I really don't agree with the majority of the program. I'm not religious and I didn't drink because of personal flaws. I drink because I like how it made me feel, I'm predisposed to alcoholism, and it's addictive.

Am I wrong in this? I feel better doing it on my own. I don't like strangers and I don't get anything out of sharing my thoughts to them.
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Old 11-06-2017, 08:37 AM
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well... do what works for you.

what didn't work for me was trying to do it on my own.

I didn't have positive experiences with AA in the early years of my journey to sobriety either.

honest reflection showed be that the reason was I was still an active alcoholic and not ready to actually embrace sobriety.

once I did get to that stage - I still had (have) certain issues with AA that I consciously set to the side because AA's benefits as a tool in my overall recovery far outweigh the aspects that bother me.

All that said - use the tools that work for you. For ME, the tools have been many and varied. AA is among them. Therapy. Time with other sober people. Community of sobriety and recovery - all have been key. Even this forum. I'm sure I would never have succeeded on my own.

I'm sorry to hear of your experience.... that had to be a real shocker and a wake-up call. I hope you're able to fully embrace sobriety because you will find that your life is far, far better and more rewarding.
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Old 11-06-2017, 09:36 AM
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Hi NerdyOne
I'm 3+ months sober myself and I only use SR. I post and read here everyday and I also read up on alcoholism, as I was pretty ignorant about it before.
Although I don't attend AA meetings, I do have some books from them and their "Living Sober" book definitely got me through the early days.
I was prepared to try anything though, I don't rule anything out.
So far, so good and before SR, I had many day 1's.
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Old 11-06-2017, 09:49 AM
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As most are going to say, you need to do whatever it takes to stay sober. I didn't go to AA, but I did a lot of reading here and other places and talked to people close to me.

I do think it is important to work to improve yourself and figure out why you needed to abuse alcohol. You say it was just because it made you feel good. While I agree it does that does explain why you abused it daily.

Just not drinking won't keep you from not drinking in the long run in my opinion.
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Old 11-06-2017, 03:26 PM
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Hi Nerdyone,
Like Culture and Ljc already say above, do whatever works for you. I guess we all need some level of community, many do AA, for other SR seems to do the trick.
I would also concur with Ljc that you should more thoroughly examine the reasons why you were drinking in the first place. You need to look at what needs to change to make your sobriety sustainable: If you were drinking because it gave you pleasure, stopping alone probably won’t do it, you’ll need to come up with something else that fills the void. Just make sure you don’t trade one addiction for another!
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Old 11-06-2017, 03:42 PM
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Doing it alone didn't work for me. AA has saved my life and I went into it kicking and screaming. As my Dad used to say to me (it was clear I had an increasingly dangerous and devastating problem for years) "AA may not be the be all end all, it might be total crap but I sure know a lot of people it works for."

And - IMO and IME (especially since I now lead a non-NA/AA based recovery group for the restaurant industry, where we provide a bridge to as many programs of recovery as possible, including AA and NA)- it doesn't matter so much WHAT you do but that you actually DO use a program and support- something besides yourself. I haven't met anyone in 20+ mo that did it completely solo - or if they had tried that, they soon learned that life was still rough and "white knuckling" - just being sober but NOT living a recovered life- was all they were doing. That's not good enough for me.

Last thing- it struck me that you cited the reasons you drank - those are just as good as any, just as common, and reasons people DO succeed in AA. "There are as many kinds of alcoholics as there are alcoholism" is something that someone said to me early on that I think of often- looking for similarities not differences has been very useful to me.

I ultimately could not rule anything - and it finally was AA or nothing- out if I wanted to live.
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Old 11-06-2017, 04:16 PM
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He NerdyOne
I'm sorry for what happened to you but I'm glad you found us.

I drink because I like how it made me feel,
you may find something like Rational Recovery and AVRT (Addictive Voice Recognition Technique) suits you better.

check out our secular forum as well
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