Right side pain, nausea, headache, anxiety
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Right side pain, nausea, headache, anxiety
The title says it all. Today I felt like a drink so I went back and read my black journal book. In the first few pages the common theme was right side uncomfortableness, nausea, headaches, anxiety. I was experiencing all of these symptoms as a result of my drinking. Alcohol, when buzzed, numbed that right side fullness, made the nausea and headaches go away, and settled my anxiety; for a little while. They all came roaring back the next morning.
I used to think alcohol, pills, and pot helped with my anxiety and it did; for a little while. But there came a point where my numbing agents were making compounded my anxiety and made it worse; much worse. I would wake up my heart racing and beating hard, my head throbbing, my stomach turning over, my mouth parched and my anxiety sky high. Feeling like I just wished I would die some mornings especially after those nights where I would down more than my normal six pack. You know those weekend nights (and sometimes Thursday night) in which you would start drinking around lunch, or even with a splash of redbull in my vodka to start my morning, and put down drinks like they are going out of style. And right on through to the evening and night powering through being dehydrated and headaches to get *********. Yeah those were fierce.
I knew it was from drinking but for quite some time I did nothing. I didn't care and chalked it up to this is my new normal feeling. As stupid as that is.
Fast forward to the back few pages of that book (which I still write in from time to time as it's nice to see some positive pages in a book of negatives and worries) you would see the book in it's entirety reads as a Batman nemesis. Basically common theme now is "I'm feeling great" so really there is no reason why I need a drink. Even with all the change currently in my life I don't need a drink. I don't feel like drinking can possibly make anything better. I no longer feel sick all the time and don't look like death warmed over. My head is painless and my thoughts are clear. I am clam and collected. I can make sound decisions and don't have to plan my life around drinks.
My relationships with my two young kids is getting better and I am strengthening our once weak bonds. I hope it will get even better in time. I'm still a little short tempered but I think I am getting better. I want to stay my life in it's entirety is better when not drinking. I am living my life instead of just existing in a drunken haze. I didn't lose any friends nor did I miss any parties after my initial party hiatus lasting a few months. Parties exist even when you don't drink and surprise surprise not everyone drinks at parties.
Newbies and lurkers life can be so much better. I suggest you just give it a try. What do you have to lose by trying?
I used to think alcohol, pills, and pot helped with my anxiety and it did; for a little while. But there came a point where my numbing agents were making compounded my anxiety and made it worse; much worse. I would wake up my heart racing and beating hard, my head throbbing, my stomach turning over, my mouth parched and my anxiety sky high. Feeling like I just wished I would die some mornings especially after those nights where I would down more than my normal six pack. You know those weekend nights (and sometimes Thursday night) in which you would start drinking around lunch, or even with a splash of redbull in my vodka to start my morning, and put down drinks like they are going out of style. And right on through to the evening and night powering through being dehydrated and headaches to get *********. Yeah those were fierce.
I knew it was from drinking but for quite some time I did nothing. I didn't care and chalked it up to this is my new normal feeling. As stupid as that is.
Fast forward to the back few pages of that book (which I still write in from time to time as it's nice to see some positive pages in a book of negatives and worries) you would see the book in it's entirety reads as a Batman nemesis. Basically common theme now is "I'm feeling great" so really there is no reason why I need a drink. Even with all the change currently in my life I don't need a drink. I don't feel like drinking can possibly make anything better. I no longer feel sick all the time and don't look like death warmed over. My head is painless and my thoughts are clear. I am clam and collected. I can make sound decisions and don't have to plan my life around drinks.
My relationships with my two young kids is getting better and I am strengthening our once weak bonds. I hope it will get even better in time. I'm still a little short tempered but I think I am getting better. I want to stay my life in it's entirety is better when not drinking. I am living my life instead of just existing in a drunken haze. I didn't lose any friends nor did I miss any parties after my initial party hiatus lasting a few months. Parties exist even when you don't drink and surprise surprise not everyone drinks at parties.
Newbies and lurkers life can be so much better. I suggest you just give it a try. What do you have to lose by trying?
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