Stronger2017

Hello SR friends,

So my family will be pet sitting at friends in a couple of weeks and I will be home alone. When I heard, my first thought was I could have a few drinks. This is how my relapse happened before and I blew the best part of three years sobriety in the process☹️ I promised myself that I’d come on here and let people know about my situation if I thought something bad like that might happen again. So here I am. Any advice about dealing with this situation is greatly appreciated.

Thanks for reading🙏

tomsteve

change your plans to exclude alcohol.

ChloeRose63

Do you attend AA meetings? Get out of the house and stay busy.

decchemist

Join your family with the pet sitting.

Stronger2017

Thanks for the quick reply Tom😀. Yeah, I’ll be working during the day so that won’t be a problem. I’ll then probably pick up some good takeout to eat when I get home followed by some TV, posting on here, shower and bed. Sounds good 👍

joandmelandhan

It's such learned behaviour to latch onto time alone as a drinking opportunity. I did it loads. Thing I do now is to prepare my mind before and take preventative measures. My children stay at their dad's twice a week so I make sure I have nice food in the house, nice drinks (a selection of pop and herbal teas) and petrol in my car. No need for last minute shopping trips then. I take no risks.
You only have one thing to do when your family are away . Stay sober by any means. Your AV will absolutely try every trick in the book:
No one will know
Just this once
You deserve it after being so good......
Blah blah blah. .....
Prepare yourself in every way possible. Treat yourself like an untrustworthy child if you must.
You CAN do it there is no question.
Plus you have SR to support you throughout. Stay close and take care xx

Stronger2017

Thanks for the advice😀 I would but it’s not possible. In a way, I think I’m in a good place to deal with this now so I’d like to try.

Stronger2017

Thanks for taking the time to reply😀 Yeah, the last time was horrible. I had 8 weeks to romanticize the drink and by the end I was going mad with anticipation! I’ll definitely make sure to have nice food and drink in the house. I’m also going to post here on that day.

“You only have one thing to do.” 😆 (very very true)

Stronger2017

Thanks for the reply Chloe😀 I don’t attend AA but I have some numbers of AA people and there’s also the hotline. I will use those options before I take a drink. And, as you say, I could always just show up at a meeting. Thanks again.

SoberLeigh

When my family was away, it was Wine Central at my house. A party for one; it was not a pretty picture and the self-loathing in the morning was awful.

Sounds like you have a good plan in place. You will be so proud of yourself when you pass this test.

We are here for you.

Lean on us.

MetalRose

Clear your home of any alcohol and make a to-do list! If you're busy doing constructive things, you'll be too busy to do destructive things...like drink.

Dee74

Hi stronger - some good suggestions here already.

Some many of us have that 'while the cats away' thing - but think about it.

Drinking is self destruction - we know that.

Any ideas we might drink in a genteel fashion alone in the house for a few days is laughable really.

We no longer want to be 'that person'.

So...don't be

The AV has watched too many teen flicks -the 'party hard cos the parents are away' thing is for kids...and we're not kids any longer.

I sometime do the 'what if' test for my choices - would this choice mortify me if others somehow found out about it?

Make a decision you'll be proud of - even if no one else ever finds out about it

D

Stronger2017

No alcohol in the house. Check.

The list is a great idea. I’ll definitely write out my plan for the day. Thanks for the help😀

Stronger2017

Thanks for the support😀 I always knew this day would come around again. And you’re right, I will be pretty proud of myself if I nail this. TBH last time I planned to keep it a secret but I fessed up to my wife almost immediately. Uncomfortable 😣 and then drinking became the elephant in the room for another 18 months!

I don’t drink anymore. There’s no going back.

MeSoSober

You did so well just by coming here and sharing this.

But yeah, don't stop there. I would heed everyone's advice to have a plan. I had almost an entire year sober in 2014 and when I drank again it was while I was housesitting for my brother. Alone, of course.

It did NOT stop with that "this one time" drinking incident. It never does. It gets worse.

Good on you for coming here. Now come back and tell us your plan in excruciating detail.

Stronger2017

Thanks Dee. I’d hate myself the next day and my family would be disappointed. And, as you said, I’m not a kid anymore.

MythOfSisyphus

Let this 'home alone' time be an opportunity to do something better than drinking! Maybe binge-watch a couple of shows on Netflix? Watch movies til the wee hours? Crank up some tunes and spend the day singing along! Catch up on reading. There are so many ways to pass the time that will enrich you, don't waste the time killing yourself with booze.

ChloeRose63

Don't forget your "play-it-forward-tape"! Just imagine as vividly as possible everything that happens when you pick up that first drink until you stop drinking and start to deal with those sickening withdrawls and the horrible guilt. No one wakes up in the morning thinking, "wow, I should have drank last night."

Maybe you could make a special project for your family while they are gone and surprise them! How about something for Halloween? Google for some creative ideas. I don't know how 'handy' you are so do what you can do! Keep your sense of purpose.

Stronger2017

Cheers for the reply. Yeah, I did want to get this out there as it’s a good record for the future.

Last time, I thought I could go straight back to sobriety or at least control the drinking but I couldn’t. I won’t make the same mistake again.

Thanks again for the support.

Ariesagain

You really, really don’t want to have that elephant move back in, you know that.

Besides, you would have to live with letting yourself down. That never feels good.

You can do this.

P.S. Ice cream is your friend.