Healthy&sober former sober&healthy 90 meetings in 90 days accountability thread
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
(((((HealthyandSober)))))
I went voluntarily into the psych hospital. There was some humiliation, which wasn’t pleasant—but I certainly wasn’t able to put my best foot forward, either. They had to manage me enough to get me calm.
Because I didn’t want to be mishandled or overmedicated, I cooperated and did everything the medical professionals suggested I do.
At first I didn’t accept their diagnosis—but eventually an exercise they led me through opened my eyes to the possibility that that place might have a valuable lesson to teach me.
The medical professionals concluded that I was actually bipolar—which, as I eventually realized, was true. I did so much better with the proper medication. I was not a wacko anymore!
I always thought that society and the people I dealt with were screwed up—but I came to realize that I was the one who didn’t fit into normal society.
As soon as I got help, I did fit. I wish I ‘d have gotten help years sooner, but I was too convinced that my view of the world was perfect!
Did they give you any kind of diagnosis in the hospital?
Might you be willing and able with insurance to see a psychiatrist consistently, preferably one who is a specialist in addictions?
A doctor’s visit would be an environment in which you could be coherent and at your best.
I imagine your time in the hospital was about as sub-optimal as it could be, both for you and the staff.
I know it was like hell for you.
I’m sorry.
Don’t turn your back on professional help, though. It could set you free.
I went voluntarily into the psych hospital. There was some humiliation, which wasn’t pleasant—but I certainly wasn’t able to put my best foot forward, either. They had to manage me enough to get me calm.
Because I didn’t want to be mishandled or overmedicated, I cooperated and did everything the medical professionals suggested I do.
At first I didn’t accept their diagnosis—but eventually an exercise they led me through opened my eyes to the possibility that that place might have a valuable lesson to teach me.
The medical professionals concluded that I was actually bipolar—which, as I eventually realized, was true. I did so much better with the proper medication. I was not a wacko anymore!
I always thought that society and the people I dealt with were screwed up—but I came to realize that I was the one who didn’t fit into normal society.
As soon as I got help, I did fit. I wish I ‘d have gotten help years sooner, but I was too convinced that my view of the world was perfect!
Did they give you any kind of diagnosis in the hospital?
Might you be willing and able with insurance to see a psychiatrist consistently, preferably one who is a specialist in addictions?
A doctor’s visit would be an environment in which you could be coherent and at your best.
I imagine your time in the hospital was about as sub-optimal as it could be, both for you and the staff.
I know it was like hell for you.
I’m sorry.
Don’t turn your back on professional help, though. It could set you free.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 635
I was diagnosed with depression i tried to kill myself in a very graphip manner.
yes i have a referral i think i need to see him i just want some peace
thank you glimmer it means so much to me that you share this with me i don't want to feel so alone or like i am some sort of a weirdo
yes i have a referral i think i need to see him i just want some peace
thank you glimmer it means so much to me that you share this with me i don't want to feel so alone or like i am some sort of a weirdo
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
You’re not a weirdo. It happens to a lot of people.
I was deeply depressed and suicidal when I went in, too.
You have such contagious high spirits when you are confident in yourself! Please stick around! You can get sober again. You got 58 days before—and every time we quit we get stronger and wiser—until we reach the point that we never want to go back to drunken stupors again.
I was deeply depressed and suicidal when I went in, too.
You have such contagious high spirits when you are confident in yourself! Please stick around! You can get sober again. You got 58 days before—and every time we quit we get stronger and wiser—until we reach the point that we never want to go back to drunken stupors again.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
I'm glad you're back and trying HAS.
I know it's hard but if you do everything you can to stay sober then no one has any cause to think about locking you up again, HAS.
You can do this
D
I know it's hard but if you do everything you can to stay sober then no one has any cause to think about locking you up again, HAS.
You can do this
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 635
thank you glimmer and dee,
im so sick i should have never go back no matter what. i understand now when people said your sobriety is the most important thing.
without it I'm back into the black hole depression self loathing i can't do anything right and guilt
i really want to live
im so sick i should have never go back no matter what. i understand now when people said your sobriety is the most important thing.
without it I'm back into the black hole depression self loathing i can't do anything right and guilt
i really want to live
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 635
alcohol has been my friend for so many years i don't know how to process anything
i feel so guilty about my sister she died in 1999 and i have wasted of these years i should have been the one who die not her my life is worthless
i feel so guilty about my sister she died in 1999 and i have wasted of these years i should have been the one who die not her my life is worthless
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Southern US
Posts: 626
H&S - your life is not worthless. You are not worthless. You helped me tonight. I’m newly sober and reading through your thread inspired me to keep going. You were so determined. I want to feel like you felt! I love the idea of an accountability thread. I love the honesty you shared when things got messy. Please hang in there. You can do this, I believe in you.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Even if you can’t see your own worth, your life is of inestimable value.
I believe you are here for a reason.
Perhaps you haven’t discovered what it is yet, but you will.
“Swim upstream” to get sober and clearheaded and eventually every moment will count.
Sobriety adds a huge amount of quality to life.
I believe you are here for a reason.
Perhaps you haven’t discovered what it is yet, but you will.
“Swim upstream” to get sober and clearheaded and eventually every moment will count.
Sobriety adds a huge amount of quality to life.
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,202
Hi Healthyandsober. You know you inspired a lot of people while you were sober. I'm sure that with decent medical support and your own will you can beat this. I really hope to hear from you soon.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 635
Thank you! for al of you, i read somewhere that God said i will have troubles but i wont be overcome. i could not understand that but i do now. i believe in God i believe he will not abandon me in the greatest tribulation of my life.
i will fight i swear i will for me and everyone out there suffering. alcoholism is pain unbearable pain but i can do it because you are with me. i am not alone anymore.
i will fight i swear i will for me and everyone out there suffering. alcoholism is pain unbearable pain but i can do it because you are with me. i am not alone anymore.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
