Blogs


Notices

Really thought I was ready this time

Old 10-25-2017, 05:29 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Mandy73's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 155
Blog Entries: 1
Really thought I was ready this time

Such a disappointing feeling, thought I was ready to do this and failed after 42 days.
Took me all day to bring myself here and admit that.

I'm not ready to give up!
Mandy73 is offline  
The Following 23 Users Say Thank You to Mandy73 For This Useful Post:
2muchpain (10-26-2017), Acheleus (10-29-2017), Anna (10-25-2017), AnvilheadII (10-25-2017), Bob4x4 (10-25-2017), BrightenMeUp (10-25-2017), columbus (10-26-2017), CreativeThinker (10-29-2017), Culture (10-26-2017), D122y (10-26-2017), DangerZone (10-26-2017), DarklingSong (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Ghostlight1 (10-25-2017), Hawkeye13 (10-26-2017), Hevyn (10-25-2017), Horatio48 (10-26-2017), mnjen (10-25-2017), SimplyFree (10-25-2017), SnazzyDresser (10-26-2017), suki44883 (10-25-2017), tomls (10-26-2017), Verdantia (10-26-2017)
Old 10-25-2017, 05:34 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
RIP Sweet Suki
 
suki44883's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 35,094
It isn't a failure unless you don't get up and start again. It's rare that anyone gets it on the first real try. Don't beat yourself up. You can do this! ((((HUGS))))
suki44883 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to suki44883 For This Useful Post:
BrightenMeUp (10-25-2017), Culture (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-25-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-25-2017, 05:45 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 104
You still have 42 days and that's something to be commended. You can do this!
Flinders39 is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Flinders39 For This Useful Post:
BrightenMeUp (10-25-2017), Culture (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-25-2017), SimplyFree (10-25-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-25-2017, 06:25 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 57,602
Mandy, you learned a lot in the 42 days of sobriety, and now you can add to that. Do you know what led you to drink, and if so, maybe you can come up with a plan so that won't happen again? Good for you for coming back.
Anna is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Anna For This Useful Post:
BrightenMeUp (10-25-2017), Culture (10-26-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), SimplyFree (10-25-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-25-2017, 06:34 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Ghostlight1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Good job on 42 days. It took me many attempts to quit. But, that doesn't mean it will for you.
As said, keep trying. There were times I couldn't make it 42 hours, but I never gave up.
Keep your chin up, you can do it.
Ghostlight1 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Ghostlight1 For This Useful Post:
Culture (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), SnazzyDresser (10-26-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-25-2017, 06:36 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Learning to live again
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 47,474
Mandy, maybe it needed to happen this way. It did for me - I was a slow learner. The last time I caved & picked up again was the very last time. It's been almost 10 yrs. I was determined not to let myself down again. You haven't given up - you will do this.
Hevyn is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Hevyn For This Useful Post:
Culture (10-26-2017), DarklingSong (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), SoberVictor (10-26-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-25-2017, 08:44 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
SimplyFree's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,298
It took me a few tries to make it stick....keep going!
SimplyFree is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to SimplyFree For This Useful Post:
Culture (10-26-2017), DarklingSong (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), SnazzyDresser (10-26-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-25-2017, 08:53 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
Bob4x4's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: Canada
Posts: 167
Blog Entries: 1
Originally Posted by Flinders39 View Post
You still have 42 days and that's something to be commended. You can do this!
you have been 98% sober over 43 days. over an entire year this would be 4 days off and 360 days sober.

keep up the good work
Bob4x4 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Bob4x4 For This Useful Post:
ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-25-2017, 09:26 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 202,389
Blog Entries: 1
Many of us faltered a time or two - it's a big task.

Look at what happened and think about what you could add to your plan to
make sure it doesn't happen again?

D

D
Dee74 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
Berrybean (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-26-2017, 05:45 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
 
tomsteve's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by Mandy73 View Post

I'm not ready to give up!
not ready to give up what- drinking or recovery?

i hope its recovery.
tomsteve is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to tomsteve For This Useful Post:
ed2715 (10-29-2017), Gottalife (10-26-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-26-2017, 06:00 AM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 1,283
Mandy,

Congratulations! 42 days - that's terrific. Just get back on the wagon. Now you know how good sobriety can feel. You just need to push past the point where you still want it. 42 is still too close to remember what you liked about it but have momentarily forgotten what you hated. Now you know you can do it. Give yourself the gift of doing it again! You can do this.
Sohard is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Sohard For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-26-2017, 06:15 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
 
Gottalife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Thailand
Posts: 6,594
42 days is exactly double the best I could manage on my own power. Well done. I just skimmed over your posts for that time, and you fought your way through some very difficult and trying situations.

The thing that struck me was that there didn't appear to be anything going on that would treat your alcholism however. You almost made it to a counsellor, but not quite. The fact that it took so long, longer than you could actually last on your own, to make some moves about treatment, suggest to me that treating your alcholism does not perhaps have as high a priority as it should.

The great thing is you are still alive and this event can serve as a stepping stone to success, but only if you learn from it and act on what you learn. Most of us here found we had to make sobriety our number one priority. Without it we know there would be nothing else. Like Dee said, perhaps you need to add more to your plan.
Gottalife is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Gottalife For This Useful Post:
Culture (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), tomls (10-26-2017), tomsteve (10-26-2017)
Old 10-26-2017, 06:31 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Guest
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Bethlehem, PA
Posts: 230
Look at it as a learning experience.

Where were you?
What was the reason you felt you needed to drink?
What triggered it?
What can you do to be prepared for this type of situation next time?

If you analyze all these questions it'll help you become sober long term. I did this the last time I relapsed and it has done wonders for me.

Most importantly, don't give up. If you truly wanted to keep drinking you would not have come back here.

Also congrats on 42-days. That is no small achievement. I don't have the statistics but most people who got sober fell on their face trying at least once so don't think you can't quit alcohol because of this relapse... If so many others can get sober permanently then you can too! Plenty of people have done it and we are all here to help you.
DangerZone is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to DangerZone For This Useful Post:
Culture (10-26-2017), Dee74 (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-26-2017, 06:35 AM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Member
 
Hawkeye13's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 10,327
You got 42 days
That's a great base

Learn from it, modify the holes in your sobriety plan,
and jump right back on the wagon

Nothing is lost unless you choose it to be
You can do this!
Hawkeye13 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Hawkeye13 For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (10-26-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-26-2017, 05:14 PM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Learning to live again
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 47,474
Mandy, how's it going today? I was thinking of you.
Hevyn is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Hevyn For This Useful Post:
ed2715 (10-29-2017), Gottalife (10-26-2017), Mandy73 (10-29-2017), tomls (10-26-2017)
Old 10-29-2017, 07:32 PM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Mandy73's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 155
Blog Entries: 1
I'm back, ty for thinking of me Hevyn. I'm ready to take this challenge on again. I was dealing with some very heavy emotional distress. I was weak. I need to learn better ways to cope in those times.
I see my Dr on Tuesday. He is my first step towards adjusting my recovery plan and making it a priority.
We had a sudden death in the family. My sisters boyfriend, he was only 17. Also my son had major surgery this week. Amongst other stresses.
I know how people say you can always find excuses to drink...I think I was just very new to sobriety and hit with several serious blows in a very short period of time.
I'm hoping to learn how to handle life's chaos without drinking.
Been having a very hard time. Feeling fragile. I drank yesterday and today I just feel gross. Not in a hangover way just ...gross.
Day 1 down. My journey begins again.

If anyone has newbie recovery advice during high stress situations I'm listening.

Thank you for your continued encouragement you are all very kind.
Mandy73 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Mandy73 For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (10-29-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Hevyn (10-30-2017)
Old 10-29-2017, 07:47 PM
  # 17 (permalink)  
quat
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,775
The best advice I ever got was 'No Matter What' , to end an addiction to alcohol one must decide to never drink again , NMW. It's not newbie centric, abstinence is the cure.
Learning about AVRT showed me how stop talking myself into trying to deny that simple truth. Great threads on those ideas here on SR in the Secular Connections forum.
Sorry to hear about your family's loss and I hope you son is continuing to heal, don't let your AV manipulate you into using those unfortunate situations as boozing sessions.
Being present and clearheaded for them will make you feel bettter in the long run, yeah? That wine witch, the AV , doesn't consider your happiness or well being , IT only wants the booze.
dwtbd is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to dwtbd For This Useful Post:
Acheleus (10-29-2017), ed2715 (10-29-2017), Fusion (10-31-2017), Mandy73 (10-30-2017)
Old 10-29-2017, 07:50 PM
  # 18 (permalink)  
Member
 
Acheleus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,920
I relapsed after nine months and I had to commit myself to staying sober. In my opinion you really have to do whatever it takes to make your life peaceful enough for you to devote yourself to long-term sobriety. I'm over two years sober now and it gets much better. Sometimes it is a bumpy ride and you have to hold on to other people and resources.
Acheleus is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Acheleus For This Useful Post:
ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-30-2017)
Old 10-29-2017, 08:37 PM
  # 19 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 202,389
Blog Entries: 1
I'm sorry for the stress Mandy but I think this is the time when you need support.

I've leant on this site at times and it's helped me get through - and stay sober.

D
Dee74 is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
ed2715 (10-29-2017), Mandy73 (10-30-2017)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:48 AM.