Checking in, hanging in there
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 666
Checking in, hanging in there
Sometimes I think not being here daily is risky.. I've been having thoughts of "oh, maybe I'm ok"... "I could eventually drink some wine again." But every time I think it, I tell myself it's a lie. I know I can't. That I'd go back to a bottle of wine a night or more.
We just had family visiting where I had quite a few temptations.. a fancy bottle of expensive French white wine brought as gift.. actually handed a glass with someone saying, "Come on, you HAVE to try it! Just a sip! You can have a little!" But I declined.
I also noticed how little everyone else was actually drinking. They had one small glass and that was about it. If this had been last year, after they went to bed, I would've drunk an entire other bottle of wine by myself, woken up feeling sick, ashamed and dreadful.
So, I got through it. Now on 141 days of freedom.. coming up on 5 months.
Just keep powering through, everyone. You will never, ever wake up in the morning and say, "Ugh, I wish I had drunk a bottle of wine last night."
We just had family visiting where I had quite a few temptations.. a fancy bottle of expensive French white wine brought as gift.. actually handed a glass with someone saying, "Come on, you HAVE to try it! Just a sip! You can have a little!" But I declined.
I also noticed how little everyone else was actually drinking. They had one small glass and that was about it. If this had been last year, after they went to bed, I would've drunk an entire other bottle of wine by myself, woken up feeling sick, ashamed and dreadful.
So, I got through it. Now on 141 days of freedom.. coming up on 5 months.
Just keep powering through, everyone. You will never, ever wake up in the morning and say, "Ugh, I wish I had drunk a bottle of wine last night."
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 104
Awesome job! I've also been finding myself in those situations (86 days sober). It's just not worth it because it won't stop at one. The first glass/ sip leads to many. In my mind that "one" isn't worth everything I've accomplished so far in getting sober.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Tea,
That is exactly how I got tempted. I was pushed by my wife's normie and addict friends. I gave in. I slipped and had 1/2 a shot. That was all. Comon...1/2 a shot..that doesn't count..right?
It counts to many. Including me...now.
I came here, and told on myself, rationalizing that it was ok. I got some tough love. I needed it. I didn't like it, but I needed it.
I have a plan now when that happens again. Basically, escalating levels of saying no with trickery as required to throw off those that insist. It could get awkward but...oh well.
Sorry for the drama....it happens to our kind sometimes.
I will try to avoid the...yelling...I am an alcoholic show...unless they pin me down and break out the funnel.
Thanks.
That is exactly how I got tempted. I was pushed by my wife's normie and addict friends. I gave in. I slipped and had 1/2 a shot. That was all. Comon...1/2 a shot..that doesn't count..right?
It counts to many. Including me...now.
I came here, and told on myself, rationalizing that it was ok. I got some tough love. I needed it. I didn't like it, but I needed it.
I have a plan now when that happens again. Basically, escalating levels of saying no with trickery as required to throw off those that insist. It could get awkward but...oh well.
Sorry for the drama....it happens to our kind sometimes.
I will try to avoid the...yelling...I am an alcoholic show...unless they pin me down and break out the funnel.
Thanks.
quat
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
I finally decided to quit , full stop , never again and never change my mind , that's my plan, ( Big Plan in AVRT).
Once I made that decision , I learned how to 'hear' my AV , that little voice and image maker in my head that suggests future consumption. I hear It, but I've stopped 'listening' to It. I recognize it as the voice of the desire for alcohol ( the Beast) and dismiss any thoughts of future drinking, because that runs afoul of my BP.
Once you separate from the AV , hear those thoughts and images as coming from a part of you that is less rational, you can see how 'listening' them would mean acting irrationally.
Having the thoughts is not a sign that anything is amiss , those thoughts are perfectly natural to someone who has consumed/abused/been addicted to alcohol. Having the thoughts of future consumption(AV) isn't what causes the abuse/addiction, Listening to and acting on those thoughts does.
That voice has access to all your own vocabulary , it is a 'part' of you , the beast once born will always remain and 'speak' out from time to time , too bad for It.
IT has to convince YOU to act in order to get ITs stuff, IT is a quadriplegic parasite trying to hijack your higher , more rational self , the part that controls your actions, the part that moves your arm and controls swallowing.
The AV can be 'cunning and persistent' , but It is so easy to spot because It has only one focus, future consumption any thought that would make you decide to bend your elbow and bring a glass to your lips is the AV , if you have decided to quit that action is no longer a choice, You don't drink.
I have found too that parsing the AV helps highlight Its single minded focus . When you hear the AV say " how nice would one drink be right now?" and then you hear "I can't" , that is still AV because in it is the kernel of an implication that there is a choice ie can or can't .
YOU have decided to Quit, YOU don' drink, by choice. The idea that you Can't is the AV smuggling in the idea that you Can , because it is in fact true , you can, the idea that you Can't is a lie , a trick.
When you decide and commit to the idea that you Don't drink, can and can't don't matter
One either drinks or one does not, do or don't . Can and can't are obfuscations of AV 'logic' , a backdoor , one step removed, circular argument soley focused on the idea of future consumption.
DON'T logic , your logic , is similarly laser-like focused and simply dispenses with the idea that you "can't" , of course you can , but YOU Don't
Once I made that decision , I learned how to 'hear' my AV , that little voice and image maker in my head that suggests future consumption. I hear It, but I've stopped 'listening' to It. I recognize it as the voice of the desire for alcohol ( the Beast) and dismiss any thoughts of future drinking, because that runs afoul of my BP.
Once you separate from the AV , hear those thoughts and images as coming from a part of you that is less rational, you can see how 'listening' them would mean acting irrationally.
Having the thoughts is not a sign that anything is amiss , those thoughts are perfectly natural to someone who has consumed/abused/been addicted to alcohol. Having the thoughts of future consumption(AV) isn't what causes the abuse/addiction, Listening to and acting on those thoughts does.
That voice has access to all your own vocabulary , it is a 'part' of you , the beast once born will always remain and 'speak' out from time to time , too bad for It.
IT has to convince YOU to act in order to get ITs stuff, IT is a quadriplegic parasite trying to hijack your higher , more rational self , the part that controls your actions, the part that moves your arm and controls swallowing.
The AV can be 'cunning and persistent' , but It is so easy to spot because It has only one focus, future consumption any thought that would make you decide to bend your elbow and bring a glass to your lips is the AV , if you have decided to quit that action is no longer a choice, You don't drink.
I have found too that parsing the AV helps highlight Its single minded focus . When you hear the AV say " how nice would one drink be right now?" and then you hear "I can't" , that is still AV because in it is the kernel of an implication that there is a choice ie can or can't .
YOU have decided to Quit, YOU don' drink, by choice. The idea that you Can't is the AV smuggling in the idea that you Can , because it is in fact true , you can, the idea that you Can't is a lie , a trick.
When you decide and commit to the idea that you Don't drink, can and can't don't matter
One either drinks or one does not, do or don't . Can and can't are obfuscations of AV 'logic' , a backdoor , one step removed, circular argument soley focused on the idea of future consumption.
DON'T logic , your logic , is similarly laser-like focused and simply dispenses with the idea that you "can't" , of course you can , but YOU Don't
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 666
Thanks so much, DarklingSong, for remembering. Still waiting on one specialist check next week. <3 Joint pain is still troubling me, but not drinking has reduced the inflammation.
We take good health for granted, and as young people you can brush off how hard we are treating ourselves, but it catches up to you.
Anyone thinking, "oh, I'm young, I can quit later.. I'm doing fine. I bounce back." Don't kid yourselves: There's no free pass.
We take good health for granted, and as young people you can brush off how hard we are treating ourselves, but it catches up to you.
Anyone thinking, "oh, I'm young, I can quit later.. I'm doing fine. I bounce back." Don't kid yourselves: There's no free pass.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
141 - how fantastic, tealily. The 'just have a little' thing - they have no idea what they're asking of us! Or where it might lead. You've grown stronger and more determined - be proud.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 1,246
Originally Posted by tealily 
Thanks so much, DarklingSong, for remembering. Still waiting on one specialist check next week. <3 Joint pain is still troubling me, but not drinking has reduced the inflammation.
We take good health for granted, and as young people you can brush off how hard we are treating ourselves, but it catches up to you.
Anyone thinking, "oh, I'm young, I can quit later.. I'm doing fine. I bounce back." Don't kid yourselves: There's no free pass.
We take good health for granted, and as young people you can brush off how hard we are treating ourselves, but it catches up to you.
Anyone thinking, "oh, I'm young, I can quit later.. I'm doing fine. I bounce back." Don't kid yourselves: There's no free pass.
Sorry to hear about the joint pain, but it sounds like things are going in the right direction health wise. Always good to see your posts.
Good luck with the test next week......
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 4,553
Hi tealily it's lovely to see you again. Even better seeing you're still going strong!
I do know that posting daily helps me tremendously and if I get lazy with it that's when the complacency can creep in. Of course that's just me. I've been a member of SR since April 16 and only since committing to a daily post at least have I drawn the courage and inspiration to put the bottle down and genuinely be happy about it.
You do have a great self awareness which goes a long way. I hope your health issues work out for the best too.
Keep vigilant sweetheart and of course you know where to find us any time xxx
I do know that posting daily helps me tremendously and if I get lazy with it that's when the complacency can creep in. Of course that's just me. I've been a member of SR since April 16 and only since committing to a daily post at least have I drawn the courage and inspiration to put the bottle down and genuinely be happy about it.
You do have a great self awareness which goes a long way. I hope your health issues work out for the best too.
Keep vigilant sweetheart and of course you know where to find us any time xxx
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