The Past, Present and Future
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
The Past, Present and Future
I can’t do anything about
The Past
What’s done is done. I can’t change it. No sense beating myself up about it or feeling “shame”. I had an illness, partially as a result of my doing, partially due to other things beyond my control. I can’t forget it but I shouldn’t dwell on it when there’s work to be done in
The Present
Living in the "Now", there are things I can do, like not taking a drink, like helping others, particularly if I’m depressed. I find the best way to relieve my depression is to find someone else who’s depressed and try to cheer up him or her. And if someone’s drinking or just had a relapse or “slip” all I can do is say “that sure happened to me”. But I have ro realize that if anyone’s going to get better they should do it for themselves, not for anyone else. And I can’t “fix” it. Shouldn’t try. When I was drinking if anyone tried to “fix” or “cure” me it always made it worse.
The Future
Tomorrow is something I can’t control although I can try to minimize the problems I might encounter in the future by doing what I can do today, Now, in the Present. Like not drinking. No one can really predict the future, particularly in the times in which we live. But we can influence others like our kids, to make life easier for them, avoid some of the mistakes we have made, be open with them about drinking, substance abuse and other things. Helping them in this way will make their future better and that will make me happier, something I have done to make their world a better place.
The Past
What’s done is done. I can’t change it. No sense beating myself up about it or feeling “shame”. I had an illness, partially as a result of my doing, partially due to other things beyond my control. I can’t forget it but I shouldn’t dwell on it when there’s work to be done in
The Present
Living in the "Now", there are things I can do, like not taking a drink, like helping others, particularly if I’m depressed. I find the best way to relieve my depression is to find someone else who’s depressed and try to cheer up him or her. And if someone’s drinking or just had a relapse or “slip” all I can do is say “that sure happened to me”. But I have ro realize that if anyone’s going to get better they should do it for themselves, not for anyone else. And I can’t “fix” it. Shouldn’t try. When I was drinking if anyone tried to “fix” or “cure” me it always made it worse.
The Future
Tomorrow is something I can’t control although I can try to minimize the problems I might encounter in the future by doing what I can do today, Now, in the Present. Like not drinking. No one can really predict the future, particularly in the times in which we live. But we can influence others like our kids, to make life easier for them, avoid some of the mistakes we have made, be open with them about drinking, substance abuse and other things. Helping them in this way will make their future better and that will make me happier, something I have done to make their world a better place.
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 421
The Past was (and still is to an extent) the hardest thing for me to get over and "accept." Rationally, I know I can't change what's happened, and I need to learn from these mistakes, but emotionally it doesn't change how those mistakes make me feel. For me, it's using those feelings as the prime motivator for my sobriety.
The past can't be changed but it shouldn't be forgotten. If used correctly, the past is one heck of a tool.
Living in my "Now." Today it's for me, but it's for my little girl too. It's for my job that I've worked so hard to get. It's for positive interactions with EVERYBODY, whether it's a close friend, or saying Good Morning to a stranger.
My future, for happiness. For a family, the one thing I want for myself more then anything.
Thank you for the post.
The past can't be changed but it shouldn't be forgotten. If used correctly, the past is one heck of a tool.
Living in my "Now." Today it's for me, but it's for my little girl too. It's for my job that I've worked so hard to get. It's for positive interactions with EVERYBODY, whether it's a close friend, or saying Good Morning to a stranger.
My future, for happiness. For a family, the one thing I want for myself more then anything.
Thank you for the post.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 1,518
Thanks for your share on this .
I read Echart Tole book the power of now but cant quite grasp it . I think what he teaches is hard to do living in the now , this moment , "all there is is now" he says I found it impossible .
I read Echart Tole book the power of now but cant quite grasp it . I think what he teaches is hard to do living in the now , this moment , "all there is is now" he says I found it impossible .
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